Olivia is now 6 months old, and I’m getting kind of tired of getting out of the shower and not recognizing the body I’m in.  In my head I’m not still 15 pounds overweight, but when I get a glance at myself in the mirror, I’m rudely reminded that I am.

I recently cleaned out my closet because I was sick of trying on clothes that didn’t fit, and it was just getting depressing.  It was a great purge of clothing. I gave away a lot of things that I knew I didn’t really want to wear even when and if I lost the weight.  The rest I put in a big garbage bag and shoved it to the back of my closet for a later date.

When I had my first two kids, I was in my early 20′s.  I didn’t do anything different with my third pregnancy, but somehow I didn’t gain as much weight with the first two and then the weight came off quickly.  But now I’m 10 years older and my body just isn’t acting the same way.  The weight really doesn’t want to come off.  I’ve tried everything I know to lose it this time – I eat healthy and I exercise as much as I can.  I am realizing that there are really two main differences with this baby than with my first two — I’m older and I didn’t get to nurse this time.

I haven’t given up hope that I’ll lose the weight, but I’m trying to embrace this new body for now.  This weight I’ve gained has brought me the best gift possible, my daughter Olivia.  So instead of bemoaning my limited wardrobe, I’m trying to think positively and rejoice in the blessing of my beautiful baby.

For now I’m trying a few things to move this weight along.  I’m staying away from carbs, and for the first time in my life I’m weighing myself daily.  I’ve actually never even owned a scale, and have always based my weight on how my clothes fit.  But since none of my clothes fit, I needed another plan.  So far this has been helping because at Christmas I needed to lose 30 lbs., and four months later I only need to lose 15 lbs.  I’m doing what I can with three kids and a busy life.  I don’t want my weight to be my focus right now because it’s hard to find that balance between taking care of yourself and taking care of your family.

Did you feel like you were living in someone else’s body after having a baby? I’d love to know how you’re taking the baby weight off because doesn’t there seem to be a lot of pressure to look like you never had a baby immediately after you leave the hospital?