A few weeks ago, I attended a speaker session for mamas-to-be that focused on infant sleep and safety for newborns. Janeen Hayward of NYC & Chicago-based parenting resource Swellbeing was the speaker, and she offered many insights on an issue that I think terrifies most new moms, and basically helped answer the question: WILL I EVER SLEEP AGAIN?
The answer: yes. And your baby can too.
Here’s the important stuff to know:
- SIDS risk is greatest between 8-16 weeks, during winter months
- A firm mattress (preferably organic), air circulation, swaddle, pacifiers and sleep sacks will all reduce the risk of SIDS
- No bumpers, blankets or toys in the crib!
- The American Pediatric Association recommends sharing a room (not a bed) with your baby until 6 months
- Babies should always sleep on their back until they can roll over on their own, usually 3-4 months
- The temperature in the room should be between 68-72 degrees. Watch for sweating or flushed cheeks to determine if baby is too warm
- Swaddle your baby until 3-4 months. A swaddle will make the baby feel secure and remind him of the womb, and will decrease the chances that the baby will move and startle himself awake.
- Babies should be dressed in a onesie, pajamas and a swaddle (3 layers), each made of breathable cotton fabric
- White noise is essential, and must be played continuously throughout the night in case the baby wakes up. This will help him self-soothe back to sleep.
- Keep room as dark as possible (use blackout shades if you need to)
Infant sleep associations:
- The less the baby associates movement, feedings and other external stimuli with sleep the better. The sooner they disassociate these things with sleep, the sooner they will sleep through the night. This includes rocking, nursing, putting the baby in a swing or stroller, walking around, etc.
- Baby should be put in crib or bassinet drowsy but not asleep. Always try to let the baby fall asleep lying flat (not in your arms) even for naps, so he will being to associate that feeling with dozing off.
- Help baby differentiate between day and night by programming their body clock. Keep room pitch black at night, but allow some natural sunlight to shine through during the day. Develop a nighttime routine before bed, and a shorter routine before naptime.
Other fun facts:
- During the first 12 weeks, you can’t do anything wrong. Focus on bonding with the baby and developing a eat/sleep schedule of 2-3 hour rotations.
- 12-16 weeks is a big developmental stage for the baby, so begin developing sleep routines at this time.
- At 16 weeks, babies can sleep 11-12 hours without a feeding.
- Newborns can only be awake 45 minutes – 2 hours at a time. If they’re awake for too long, their body will produce cortisol which keeps them awake longer and sends them into the “I’m fussy and exhausted and can’t fall asleep” stage. Avoid this by watching the baby’s cues (eye rubbing, dazed off look) and keeping track of the time.
- Babies will often go to sleep easier for others (meaning not their mama) because you are their comfort, food and entertainment. To them, everyone else is boring!
I found all of this fascinating… but also kept in mind that all babies are different and will need different things to develop a healthy sleep pattern, as I’m sure all new moms who have gone through this can attest! Nonetheless, this is a great starting off point for the first 3-4 months.
What were some of the biggest lessons you’ve learned about infant sleep?
hostess / cantaloupe / 7356 posts
- Consistency is key with whatever you do – bedtime, routines, nap times, etc. Babies thrive on routine!
- Some babies just don’t sleep 11-12 hours overnight. My son never has. Even when he goes without a feeding, he is wide awake and ready to go after 10 hours of sleep.
- You can’t control everything. Sometimes babies nap and sleep poorly for no apparent reason.
- The 30 minute nap sucks. My son napped for 30 minutes from 4 months – 5.5 months regardless of what I did.
GOLD / pomegranate / 3695 posts
I find it comforting that I can’t do anything wrong during the first 12 weeks!
apricot / 315 posts
“At 16 weeks, babies can sleep 11-12 hours without a feeding.”
Yes, and I am capable of going 3 weeks without a feeding…My point being just because they can doesn’t mean they will!
My dd was sleeping for 6-8hr stretches, I was happy with that, then she was sick and hospitalized and has since gone back to waking every 2.5-4 hours. I try to soothe her a bit so falls back to sleep without feeding but it just doesn’t work. Inevitably, I end up just nursing her so we can both go back to sleep.
apricot / 386 posts
I’m obviously not a doctor or expert but I disagree with the comment about blackout shades and white noise being essential. How will your baby ever learn to sleep anywhere but in their own room with complete darkness and noise? This can make it impossible to travel with a small one if they are used to all these things.
That said, I think there is a ton of great information in this article!
guest
Good tips. My baby is 6 months and I feel like we’re good with sleep. The only thing I questioned was three layers to sleep in! Really? We live in Texas and my baby was born in the summer, so we just used a diaper and swaddle. But even now that its cool, I can’t imagine three layers. I’ve heard you should dress them how you would like to be dressed. If you’re wearing jammies, using a sheet and blanket, maybe three layers is the way to go? We get hot!
GOLD / persimmon / 1038 posts
thanks for all the great info!
hostess / cantaloupe / 7356 posts
Oh yeah, the 3 layers? Definitely not in the summer. My LO slept in a onesie and swaddle all summer long. In September, it was just sleeper and sleep sack. In October added the onesie underneath and sometimes the fleece sleeper.
blogger / apricot / 455 posts
This is a great post! I think that what @winniebee said,
” You can’t control everything. Sometimes babies nap and sleep poorly for no apparent reason.” is SUCH an important point.
blogger / nectarine / 2042 posts
Very informative! Favoriting this for future reference!
blogger / persimmon / 1195 posts
Another SIDS reducing tip is to have a fan in the room to keep the air moving. You don’t want it blowing on them, but just moving the air around keeps from getting stale.
Also, I think that a lot of people follow these “rules” for bed time well, but when it comes to naps, slack a bit. I have a friend whose baby died of SIDS at 10 weeks after he fell asleep on their bed in the morning. She’d nursed him and he fell asleep and she went to take a shower.
In re: rocking to sleep, I’ve got a rock star sleeper and I always rock him to sleep. Sometimes I’ll put him down drowsy, but the kid just falls asleep in my arms.
blogger / pomegranate / 3157 posts
I didn’t know that the risk for SIDS is increased in winter – why is that? Both my babies will have been born in the winter, but Cali winters aren’t too bad, thankfully!
cherry / 124 posts
I also have to agree with @winniebee and @Mrs. Paintbrush: babies (and toddlers) are individuals just like us adults. Some are good sleepers, some are not. With your first child, you think everything they are and everything they do (be it “good” or “bad”) is because of you, and then you do everything the same with your second, and it all turns out differently.
Our first baby woke up once a night to nurse from 5ish weeks old and then stopped by himself at 10 months old and has been sleeping through the night since then. But he was a terrible napper. He never really slept longer than 40 minutes until he was probably 8-9 months and didn’t consistently take proper longish naps until much much later.
So when Baby #2 was on his way, I was super confident about nights (since obviously I had done EVERYTHING right and was pretty much the champion of night sleep) but determined to get naps under control from the start with our second child.
Turns out, they are just different. Baby #2 falls asleep on his own (something our first took ages to master), but still wakes to nurse, often several times a night, at 18 weeks old. And despite doing everything completely by the book (Baby Whisperer style), naps are still a huge challenge for us. Just goes to show…
apricot / 310 posts
That SIDS stuff scares me so much I can barely function. I need to go cry…
nectarine / 2257 posts
The sleep “experts” always make me laugh. Yes, they have some good advice, but they make it sound like you just need to follow their advice, and your baby will nap and sleep through the night according to the textbook. In my experience, that is so not what actually happens. Every baby is different, and trying to enforce all of these rules can make you a little crazy. I became a much happier mama once I realized that some of my daughter’s sleep issues were simply related to her personality and not to my failing as a mother by not following all of the rules of the sleep experts.
GOLD / pear / 1772 posts
Wow , three layers and continuous white noise? I had no idea.
GOLD / pear / 1772 posts
@Mrs. Stroller: omg… This scares me so much. I have done the same!
pea / 6 posts
What the heck, three layers? A onesie, pajamas, and a swaddle? My baby roasts when there are that many layers and we live in ‘cooler’ Seattle. Our house is kept at 70 degrees now.
apricot / 377 posts
@mewtill: +1
pear / 1878 posts
There is a lot of stuff here presented as absolute and final. Most of it isn’t. Most 16 week old babies will not go through the night without being fed, regardless of whether or not they ‘can’. Most babies do not need three layers, even in the winter. Some babies hate white noise. Lots of people successfully rock their babies to sleep, and prefer it that way. Most of these things are only applicable to some babies, some of the time.
pear / 1878 posts
@Mrs. High Heels: At least part of it is because people drastically overdress their children (three layers would have been far too much for my daughter) and they die from the heat. As with everything, follow your instincts first.
GOLD / cantaloupe / 5011 posts
I find it really overwhelming that they recommend sleeping in the same room as the baby for the first 6 months.