I’m a little nervous writing this post because it isn’t filled with fun facts or even book recommendations. We really struggled on how to sleep train Chloe, and did not agree in approach or method. Papa Jumper is a fan of the Ferber Method, and I’m a fan of the “I will not let my kid cry so I’ll do whatever it takes, no matter how long it takes” method. In the end, I agreed to let Papa Jumper sleep train Chloe IF and only if he bent the rules and took cues from Chloe.
Neither of us read any books on sleep training, so the idea and concept was completely foreign to us. When Chloe was first born, I followed her lead and let her nap when she was tired. She started sleeping through the night (which is defined as 5-6 straight hours of sleep) around six weeks old. Her excellent nighttime sleep stopped somewhere around 5-6 months. I think it was a combination of separation anxiety (Papa Jumper was out of the country for two weeks) and sleep regression. Her disrupted night time sleep continued as she began to teethe. We found ourselves getting up 3-4 times a night with our 12 month old. It felt like we were back in the newborn days, and we were exhausted. Chloe has always been an awful napper so I wasn’t getting any kind of break or rest.
with a face this adorable, it’s hard to be angry that you’re so tired!
At her twelve month well visit, our pediatrician said it was time to introduce whole milk and wean Chloe from the bottle. All I could think of was, “Crap. How the hell am I supposed to get her to sleep now?!” and let me tell you, it took us nearly two months to figure out a game plan. Chloe and her bottle are BFFs. She has always taken a bottle to go to sleep and I didn’t see anything wrong with this until the pediatrician told me otherwise. Oops. It took me a few weeks to wean her from the morning bottle. She absolutely will not go to sleep without her bottle so we cheat and let her have a bottle with water in it, instead of milk. Her bottle is like a security blanket. Sometimes she’ll take a few sucks from the bottle, then actually snuggle with it to fall asleep! Breaking this habit is harder than we thought.
Our pediatrician recommended the Ferber Method to us. The Ferber method recommends introducing a soothing nighttime routine then putting the baby to bed sleepy but awake, and allowing baby to soothe himself to sleep while checking them in increments. This instantly made me nervous because my kid is *never* sleepy but awake. She goes from 500mph to lying down and dozing off with her bottle only. How were we supposed to pull this off? I’m also not a fan of letting my kid cry herself to sleep.
Papa Jumper had a 5-day weekend over Thanksgiving, so we finally decided to give this a try. Night one was awful. We let Chloe take her bottle as usual, then put her in her crib. As soon as she laid down, she started screaming… and I started crying. My gut reaction was to reach in for my baby, but I let Papa Jumper take the lead. He let Chloe cry for 5 minutes, then went in to soothe her. He went in every 5 minutes for an hour, before she finally fell asleep. I will admit: We argued furiously the next morning over this so-called method. Hearing my child cry made me heart break into a million pieces and all I did was worry that she was scared and lonely and maybe even afraid of the dark.
The second night, Papa Jumper put her in her crib after we finished our bedtime routine. This time, he sat in the rocker beside her crib, and stayed there until she fell asleep. She seemed relaxed and comforted knowing her papa was right beside her, so this time it took 10 minutes. He has done the same thing every night for the last two weeks, and Baby Jumper has been falling asleep without shedding a single tear AND without a bottle. Papa Jumper went out of town yesterday for a two-day business trip. Last night was my first night doing our new bedtime routine solo, and we both worried that him not being home (and taking charge of bed time) would really mess up Chloe’s routine. I’m ridiculously excited to say that it didn’t. She fell asleep as soon as I put her in her crib and she slept 10 glorious hours last night.
Once we figured out what “method” worked best for our child, everything else fell into place. Her sleeping better at night has even translated into nice, long afternoon naps. She’s taken a three hour long nap every day for the last two weeks. It’s unbelievable!
Did you sleep train your child? Did you follow a particular method or figure things out as you went along?
Hellobee Series: Sleep Training part 8 of 10
1. Sleep Training Books by Guides2. When to Sleep Train by Mrs. Bee
3. Does When You Sleep Train Help Determine Success? by Mrs. Bee
4. Sleep Training Noelle: Part I by Mrs. High Heels
5. Sleep Training Noelle: Part II by Mrs. High Heels
6. Rubies’ Sleep Training Story by sleep
7. Sleep Training Part 1 – How We Night Trained by Mrs. Bee
8. Sleep Training by Mrs. Jump Rope
9. The Whens, Whys and Hows of Our Sleep Training Process by Mrs. Pen
10. Sleep at 8 months by Mrs. Hopscotch
Hellobee Series: Mrs. Jump Rope part 6 of 7
1. PCOS, Clomid and our journey toward parenthood Part 1 by Mrs. Jump Rope2. PCOS, Clomid and our journey toward parenthood PT 2 by Mrs. Jump Rope
3. PCOS, Clomid and our journey toward parenthood pt 3 by Mrs. Jump Rope
4. Made With Love Newborn Photos by Mrs. Jump Rope
5. first birthday photoshoot by Mrs. Jump Rope
6. Sleep Training by Mrs. Jump Rope
7. Resentment and Jealousy by Mrs. Jump Rope
hostess / papaya / 11525 posts
That’s wonderful that you were able to find a way to get her to sleep that worked for both of you (in the end). I refuse to do CIO and so does my husband so….we’ll see what happens as our lo gets older!
ETA: GAH – her EYES are so lovely!!
GOLD / pear / 1655 posts
Holy cutest kid ever… Seriously!
blogger / nectarine / 2042 posts
I’m glad you guys found a method that works for Chloe! And, seriously, she is just ridiculously adorable. Oh my!
olive / 67 posts
Her eyes and those lashes….oh my. Looks like Papa Jumper will Be busy fending off the boys in the near future.
Oh..and so glad you found a sleeping method that worked…yay!!!
persimmon / 1462 posts
We’re working on finding a good balance for our family. I’m not at all opposed to CIO after DDs horrendous sleep regression but lately her cries are worse than before. So we go in, like you, very five minutes or so. Wed Better stop bottle weaning for sleep now! Ahhh
GOLD / nectarine / 2331 posts
She’s adorable! So happy to hear you ALL are getting better sleep!
GOLD / nectarine / 2553 posts
She is SO adorable… those lashes!!
hostess / papaya / 10062 posts
She is so cute!
GOLD / persimmon / 1389 posts
In pretty much every family I know who has done some kind of sleep training, it has fallen on the dad to take charge while mom takes a walk or otherwise gets out of the house (or at the very least tries to be somewhere where she can’t hear the crying). At least among my friends, it’s the only way to keep the moms from running in and putting an end to the entire process :)
GOLD / pomegranate / 3695 posts
I’m so glad you got such great results with this method! And Chloe is so adorable…
blogger / pomegranate / 3135 posts
Chloe is tooo cute – I love her eyes! Papa Jumper seems like a great dad – glad you guys found a compromise that worked for you guys and that you’re all getting some better sleep these days. :) We sleep trained early on… and even though it was hard, it seemed to work out well in the long run because Noelle is a great sleeper now.
blogger / persimmon / 1194 posts
She is so adorable! At different points with M we’ve done a little sleep training. We started early with his naps during the 4m sleep regression. We introduced a lovey and let him cry a few minutes. But, night time wasn’t really an issue. He went through separation anxiety periods around 8m when he’d have trouble. We mostly used ferber at these periods, but not totally. When I’d sooth him, I’d pick him up and rock him for a couple minutes. It just worked for us. It really seems like “sleep training” is something that gets revisited periodically in our house and only for a night or two and rarely with more than a few minutes of crying. Maybe I’m just laid back about it, but it always seems like a non-issue, we just let him cry for a few minutes, he plays with toys and figures it out. If not, one of us rocks him for a little bit, then puts him down and he conks out. I think I’m just a big softie, really. I’m always like, “he buddy, you just want to hang out with mummy a little longer?” It’s totally going to backfire on me!
apricot / 315 posts
She is too cute, love her beautiful long eyelashes!
persimmon / 1282 posts
We’re sleep training round 2 and it’s been a mess. I’m hoping things get better for my own sanity. Glad to hear things are better with your LO! i do have a question. My LO still gets all hysterical even if my DH is there. He just wants me. Any tips on getting your baby to sooth with Daddy?
olive / 54 posts
THOSE EYES! Wow!!
olive / 82 posts
We nap trained first, and it came down to DH being the tough guy because I’m the softy. There was a moment when we had just put PB down in his crib for a nap and he was crying loudly… and I was just outside his bedroom door, feeling miserable and paralyzed. DH told me to just leave the house and go run all the errands I had been planning to do that day, so I reluctantly left. I still remember moping around Costco, thinking “my poor baby is all alone and crying… my poor little baby…”
Meanwhile, PB had cried for about 4 more minutes after I left, and then zonked out for a nice long nap. DH was right – I just needed to get out of the house. The kid is still (mostly) a good napper now.
Your daughter is ridiculously cute!
blogger / cantaloupe / 5108 posts
Oh yay! so glad it worked out. I’m still not sure what will work with sienna, because if i let her cry, she just cries more and then chokes on her own saliva. :|
blogger / apricot / 455 posts
OK, she’s just adorable! And those pigtails?! Gaugh!
We sleep trained here using the Sleep Sense method, where you progressively work your way out of the room. So you start next to the crib, then after a few days you move the chair farther away. You repeat that cycle until you are out of the room and then out of sight. We refused to do cry-it-out since we are adoptive parents and that’s pretty highly frowned upon. (For obvious reasons) It worked well, but we still to this day struggle with wake-ups and early rising. (As in, “Let’s discuss things now Mama!”) Oh well. Someday I will sleep again.