Hellobee

Although I never planned to SAHM, maternity leave showed me quite clearly that it definitely wasn’t for me. My husband was home with me for 10 weeks because he is a teacher, and as soon as he went back to work I knew I could never stay home long term. I just don’t know how people do it.

I never planned on being a sahm and while the adjustment back to work was hard (being away from A), it more than confirmed my initial thoughts that I’m a better mom for working. But there are of course days, where I think “what if?”

I think it’s human nature to wonder about the other side, but you know best and I trust that you’ll 110% acclimate with your decision to be a SAHM! :) <3 him, cutie pie~

I loooooved my maternity leave, but working became my new normal. If I still had daycare and could be a SAHM too, I’d be all over it! I don’t really think either side of the fence is easier though. But I do think the happiest SAHMs have some help at least once a week.

As a not-by-choice-SAHM, I agree that it’s really rough. Some women seem cut out for it. I’m just not one of them! However, circumstances have conspired to keep in this role for longer than I ever would have desired, so I try my best to look on the bright side and cherish all the time I have with LO. Some days that’s easy, some days it’s not. Such is life, I suppose.

DH is a WAHD because his job has always allowed him to work from home. I work a full time office job, so I knew I would be going back. At the end of my pregnancy just thinking about leaving my baby was enough to send me into panicked tears. But in reality, working makes me a better mom. That and lots of kids don’t have the time with their dads the way that DS does. I’m grateful for that.

This was the hardest decision I had to make! I also absolutely LOVE my co-workers and office environment but at the same time, the thought of someone else getting to spend more time with my little one than I would – just broke my heart. So ultimately I decided to be a SAHM and while it has its challenges – I just try to keep a positive attitude. I even googled – how to be a stay at home mom!

I had always planned on being a SAHM once we had 2 kids but after my maternity leave experience, I’m not sure I’m cut out for it either. I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that both our families are far away and we don’t have any friends with kids that live nearby. The days were just so monotonous and lonely. If I would have had someone to have playdates with or someone to baby-sit when I needed a break, it might not have been as bad. So- I think it sometimes depends on your situation and the support you have. I think SAHM is one of the hardest jobs on Earth- I have a lot of respect for them!

I was also forced to be a SAHM by our circumstances and I feel confident I would be a happier person if I had a job. It’s a hard job and some days feel like they never end. BUT, then you get the beautiful times when you get to be the first person to watch your LO reach a new milestone, you get to take them places and enjoy life experiences with them.

I don’t think that I will ever regret the time I have spent at home with LO, but I do think that I will go back to working sooner rather than later.

It is a really hard choice for me, but I’m working two days a week. The hardest part of SAHM of an infant is the lack of adult interaction and boredom. I probably will do it with #2 though.

I don’t think I could do it alone. I would need some kind of child care so that I could have a break or else it is a job that you never get a break from.

i’m a stay at home wife – soon to be stay at home mom i guess – and it was an EASY decision to make. When I got married, my husband was living in a different city and the plan was to have me move in with him. Which meant, i’d have to quit my job, which i GLADLY did (i was in IBD and hated every minute of it). When I moved to his place, we made a decision to move to a completely different state in a few months – (PA to TX) so there was no point in me finding another job at that time. It’s been almost 2 years since we moved to texas and i’m still a stay at homer.
I know a lot of people judge me and my family HATES that i’m not pursuing a career – or even higher education for myself. But honestly, we do well financially without me working, so I have the liberty to pursue a passion versus just a job (which for 5 years, that’s what i did. i had a job that i did blindly to get paid). Unfortunately, i haven’t figured out what my passion is!!

Now, we have a baby on the way, and my husband thinks that it’s not the best idea for me to go back to work next year or even school (which is what i’ve been contemplating). We’d have to find day care, and doggie day care, which means that in the end, any additional income I make would just go towards paying for all the other expenses we’d incur. Also, I really want to be very very involved with my child for the first 3 years, and going back to work (or school) would take that away from me… so it’s a matter of just finding the best of both worlds i guess.

In the mean time, i volunteer for a nonprofit organization, mainly doing work from home, so it’s kind of like i “work from home”.

I do agree though – there are days that when I feel nuts from the lack of human interaction (new in town = no friends!)

I’m a SAHM and it can be challenging at times. The first few months with a newborn/baby was oh so new and, despite being sleep deprived, the experience was wonderful. I didn’t want to think about going back to work and so I didn’t!

Now that LO is a toddler, he is more mobile (meaning I can take him to the zoo, museum, have lunch with him, go to the park, etc) but he is also more needy in a verbal way. He always wants mommy by his side and that is the challenging part. I’m working on ways to keep both him and I busy (like signing up for museum memberships, getting together with other SAHM’s I know, and doing an errand everyday).

Some days fly by. Others go at a snails pace. But all in all, I am happy to be where I am and lucky that I can see my son “growing.” We’ll see what happens when he starts school…maybe this mommy won’t want to go back to work even then!

I often think about whether I made the right decision to be a SAHM. I have a graduate degree and worked for 6 years before my LO was born. I do miss the adult interaction and using that side of my brain, but I also LOVE being at home with my LO. I really enjoy the fact that I pretty much get to witness all her firsts. I do get help though. She’s in day care twice a week, and I plan at least one play date a week. This has helped keep me sane. Being at home has also allowed me to evaluate other possibilities that I could do to perhaps work part-time in the future.

I was a SAHM mom for the first 18 months and it was no doubt the hardest thing I’ve ever done. It comes with a ton of happy moments but like people have mentioned, there is no such thing as a break, even when there’s a physical break (ie when baby is napping), mentally we are still fully engaged. It’s exhausting.

At 18 months, I went back to work full time, which was also exhausting in it’s own right having to work a full day and then come home to cook, chores, and tend to a toddler.

Currently, I’m working part-time and it’s honestly the best of both worlds. LO gets social interaction at daycare, I get a mommy break and social interaction at work, and I still have quality time with LO when I pick her up from half-day daycare.

At first I thought I could never be a SAHM and really believed that someone else would be better at taking care of my kid than me. After he grew out of the “will only nap when I hold him” phase and I could actually get things done during the day, I thought I could swing staying home. I ended up going back to work and I have some jealousy towards the nanny that she is the one that gets to take him to the park and story time and have fun with him and my hours with him are so limited. I wish I had a part-time option which I think would be the perfect scenario.

I worked part-time when my first was born, and then became a full-time SAHM when my second was born 15 months later. I do love it, but there are some really hard days! I’ve tried to explain it to my husband but sometimes he has difficulty understanding. He finally is understanding that in a way, it’s just like any other job – you have days you love & feel really fulfilled, and days that stink (maybe literally!) and make you want to quit. But there really are many more days that I love, most of the time!

I aganoized over my decision to leave a career I adored. It was the right decision for what we want out of our family and our life but I struggle everyday with the loss of self identity.

I quit my job shortly before we got married, planning on finding something new after we got back from our honeymoon. But we found out we were pregnant right away, so we decided I should just stay at home from that point on as I had intended to be a SAHM whenever a baby came along.

Some days are hard. I do miss the camaraderie of other adults throughout the day. But then there are definitely things I don’t miss and am happy to do without!

I think whether you stay at home, work part or full time, all will have difficult days, but each person has to find what works best for them and their family. There is no one ‘right’ or ‘perfect’ way of doing things.

(I’m happy to be a SAHM, by the way.) :)

I never planed on being a SAHM but was laid off while on maternity leave (grant funded position and the grant wasn’t renewed). I have been at home with LO for 7+ months now, and there are still days when I question whether or not I want to do this full time. I absolutely love being with LO, but I also miss the social interaction and the mental challenges that I had when I was working. I’ve found that I have to participate in a lot of activities outside of the house (moms groups, playdates) to keep us both busy :)

Some times I find being a SAHM really exhausting and not always fun. But I literally could not fathom the idea of someone else spending all that time with my girl. I would be heartbroken to miss out on it. I’d love to work a few afternoons a week, but that’s it. I could never miss all of that time with my baby.

Thanks for sharing this. I really want to be a SAHM one day, but worry at times that I won’t be good at it!

At first when I left my job I was a little sad but I have not regretted the decision to stay at home with my kids. The first day that I was alone with my three boys I nearly had a panic attack. I thought there was no way I could parent all three all by myself all day. The more I did it the more confidence I gained. As learned their schedules and I made it trough more days on my own it really turned out ok. I have been out of the work force for 4.5 years now.

One of my closest friends is a WOHM and she can’t figure out how I do it. I can’t figure out how she does it. We are each doing what works best for our families and ourselves. I think if you want to be a SAHM you need to give it some time. It takes awhile to get into the grove of being Mom 24/7. Try it out for a bit. if you end up wanting to go back to work you always can.

While pregnant with my first, I thought I would go back to work. But while I was still in the delivery room right after I had him and held him for the first time, I knew I could not go back to work. While on maternity leave we figured out our finances and cut things back, then when I went back in to work to help with some reports before my leave was up I told my boss I wouldn’t be returning.
I did end up working part time (mostly from home) for a while when we only had one child, but I didn’t like it because every spare moment when he was napping or entertaining himself I would have to work.
I have never regretted staying home, but it is hard some days and I feel like the day is never-ending. But I have never really thought that I would rather be at work somewhere. Even on days where I get down I still don’t want to leave my boys for a whole day.
The loneliness is the hardest part, but I have recently joined a couple mom’s groups that have many activities scheduled. I feel a hundred times better than I did before, when the days felt like they dragged on and on.

I will be a SAHM shortly (DD is 3.5 months, I went back to work, but am miserable bc my job is so stressful and requires so much outside of business hours)…I know from maternity leave that it’s definitely not easy… And the vision I have of what it entails- Me, dressed super cute, holding my iced green tea from SB and pushing my daughter, also dressed super cute, around the sunny park in her super cute Uppa Baby Vista- that only happens 2% of the time. Usually, we never make it to the park bc it takes 47 hours to get us both ready to get out the door, and even if we are both super cute, DD will have a blowout all the way up her back the minute we get to where we’re going. I should dress her in rags and I know she’d never have a blowout again! I digress…In summary, I know it ain’t easy, but it’s going to beat the HELL out of the rat race that is slowly eating away at my soul!

Your title made me laugh… It’s exactly how I felt the first few months! I stayed at home for the first 18 months for a variety of reasons… Then switched to WAHM with part-time child care. This is my current situation, and while I have my bad days/weeks… It honestly is my dream situation. I’m lucky that my career allows for this, because it allows me to have my time, feed my soul… But also allows me to do the other really important job in my life… Mama! I do think that as you get through the next couple of months, it will become more obvious what is right for YOU.

I am at FT WOHM and it is the best fit for our family for now. My mat leave was hard, lonely and tiring, but i miss LO when i am at work. I did want to say, though, that i have been home with her 2 days in the last 2 weeks due to sickness, and it is a lot more fun for me to be home with a 15 month old than a 5 week old! (She diidnt have a lot of symptoms, so it was more daycare excclusion).) I still have a ton of respect for thosevwho do it full time!

I have always planned on being a SAHM and absolutely love it. For ME personally in OUR situation I have never once thought of my job as hard or regretted our decision. I don’t miss working and can’t imagine going back. I have a lot of interaction with others via walks in the neighborhood, trips to the grocery store, trips to the nursing home where we visit/take care of my grandma twice a week, church, bible study, etc. we are so busy that we are hardly ever home for a full day.

I’m currently a sahm to our 6 month old. As is normal for most people we know here in Australia, I’ve taken 12 months of leave, planning to return part-time after that. But I’m not sure I’ll last that long and may go back earlier if circumstances, especially child care, permit. I have been lucky to have lots of help, to have met some other great sahms, etc, and most days I love it. But I miss the adult interaction, the unpredictable days, and especially the mental challenges.

DS is 2 and I am so glad I never quit my job. I don’t know if I could ever be a SAHM. My parents are my life-saver who have taken care of DS for the past 2 years. DS is now going to go to pre-school full days and I feel like the timing is right for him for school. If we have a #2, I may have to transition into being a SAHM…I am probably going to need a ton of support!

I’ve been a SAHM for the last four months, mostly because my income wouldn’t even cover daycare. It’s definitely harder than I expected…the loneliness gets to me, as well as the frequent feeling that I need a second pair of hands! Plus, I don’t always feel like DH “gets” it: he gets to LEAVE his job every day!
On the other hand, I feel SOOOOO unbelievably lucky to be with them each day. I get to see their milestones, parent them exactly the way I want, and bond with them constantly.
Would I rather be a WOHM? Maybe. But in the meantime, I’m trying to soak up every minute!