When we conceived the second time, we were shocked at how quickly it happened. To be honest, we were a little terrified and had a few “what did we do?” conversations after we first found out. It took us over a year and two rounds of clomid to conceive Liam, so we just figured it would take at least a few months of trying the second time around. When the due date was changed from March 21st to March 28th, we really started to panic, as Liam’s birthday is March 30th. Then, we started to get excited. Joint birthday parties, here we come! They’ll be two years apart and grow to be the best of friends! The first year will be hard, but it will be worth it when they can play together!
Then, we lost the pregnancy. Suddenly I realized just how excited I was and how much I wanted to be pregnant and give Liam a sibling.
Since I didn’t know what was day one of my cycle after the miscarriage, it was hard to begin charting, but I made a guess and started taking my BBT every morning and logging it in fertility friend. I also had a couple of blood tests, at the recommendation of my doctor, to make sure the hcg level was dropping at a normal rate (which it was).
I started my next cycle a little less than a month after the miscarriage, and I thought that I was back on track. I continued charting and used OPKs this time, which I thought were positive last weekend. Then, AF started on only day 14 of my cycle. I was very upset. To top it off, the next day several popular bloggers announced their pregnancies and they are all due in April. I had a rough morning thinking about how we probably would have known the sex of our baby by now. Instead, I was stressing about charting and my cycles were all over the place. I decided to call my OBGYN to see if I could come in to talk to him about everything and I thought, while I was there, I’d ask if I could do clomid again at some point. Well, much to my surprise, he prescribed me clomid right away and told me I could start taking it this cycle!
It was amazing how much that changed my mood and perspective. It might not work right away, but at least I feel like we have a better chance of getting pregnant sooner rather than later. It might work and we might lose the pregnancy again, which would be awful, but that’s the risk we take when we choose to try for another baby. It might work too well and we could end up with multiples. That would be very, very difficult, but I know that whatever happens, we will do the best we can with the hand we are dealt.
One of the first things I do when starting a new cycle of TTC is to check to see what my due date would be if we conceived. If it happens this cycle, I’d be due around July 8th, 2014. It’s not ideal timing work wise for me because I’d deliver on summer break and probably be expected to return to work at the beginning of the new school year, but at this point, I don’t care about perfect timing. Hopefully we can save some money and work something out so I can take some more time off of work at the beginning of the school year. Or maybe I won’t conceive this cycle and the circumstances will change again. If I’ve learned anything from TTC and parenthood, it’s impossible to control everything and sometimes you just have to go with the flow.
Wish us luck as our journey to baby #2 continues!