Hellobee

I was a breastfeeding mama for fifteen months, and I find the subject so miraculous and fascinating! Even though my breastfeeding journey doesn’t really involve anything that was extraordinarily amazing or difficult, I just wanted to share my personal experiences on some of the different areas of breastfeeding and what worked for me.

Latch – Leading up to Mini Pbj’s birth, I had read all kinds of stories, many from moms here on Hellobee, who struggled with latching, and I was so anxious that it might be an issue for us. Mini Pbj was born naturally and I was so happy that we were able to start breastfeeding just moments after she was born. From that first latch Mini Pbj seemed to have it under control! However, a few hours after she was born her doctor came in to inform us that she was tongue tied and needed to have that fixed in order to prevent any issues with latching in the future. I remember being so nervous for her, but they assured me she would be fine; and she was. Assuming the procedure did its job, we never had any struggles with latching throughout our 15 month journey.

Pumping – Since I would be returning to work, I knew that I would have to pump at home and at work to be able to provide milk for Mini Pbj. I used the Medela Pump In Style, and that thing worked like a charm the entire time. I definitely put it through its paces! I started pumping almost immediately after coming home from the hospital, I think 4 days to be exact. When my milk came in, Mini Pbj was only nursing about 20 minutes on one side before falling off or asleep…or both. So I decided to pump for 20 minutes on the other side while she was nursing. I guess I was trying to avoid being “lopsided” or getting too full in between feedings, but I contribute that process to helping me develop my gigantic stockpile so quickly. During maternity leave I would pump during most of the feedings, at least 4 times a day. I was getting 4-5 oz. at every session. Once I went back to work, I would pump twice while at work for 20 minutes each time, and then once in the morning before work, and once in evenings before bed. I kept up with this schedule for 6 months before I decided to start cutting out some pumping sessions. Obviously I was getting tired of lugging all the equipment back and forth from work, but I also had been able to create a stockpile large enough to last Mini Pbj until she was a year old. By last I mean that I had enough milk to send to grandma’s house each day for six months. I didn’t use my stockpile when I was at home since we still continued to nurse. I didn’t follow any particular schedule or plan to drop pumping sessions, I just started by taking them down from 20 minutes to 10 minutes, and then out completely. It was probably over a period of two weeks. During that time I did experience some fullness and some milk “let downs” at the time when I would be pumping, but overall it wasn’t too bad.

Storage – At its largest, my freezer stockpile was over 200 (8oz) bags, which definitely wouldn’t have fit in my regular freezer! We were fortunate enough to have a large freezer in our garage that was basically filled entirely with breastmilk! I used the breastmilk storage bags from Lansinoh, and would flash freeze them laying down flat, and then store them inside of baby wipe boxes inside the freezer. I give tons of credit to Mr. Pbj for this entire process…because let me tell you, it was a process! He did a wonderful job of dating, freezing, and organizing the milk bags in chronological order, and making sure we used them in the correct order! I couldn’t have done this without him!

Other Issues – Although I avoided latch issues, towards the end of my breastfeeding journey, I did run into some troubles with clogged milk ducts. Those were sooooo painful! I remember googling all sorts of remedies on how fix them, but the ones that usually worked the best for me were warm washcloths, massaging, and nursing on the clogged breast. I was also fortunate enough that I never experienced any nipple cracking/bleeding. They got quite chapped in the beginning, but using lanolin really seemed to help.

Time Span/Why I stopped – My initial goal for breastfeeding was to make it until Mini Pbj was a year old. I figured by that point she would be old enough and I would be ready to quit. However, when Mini Pbj’s first birthday came around, I wasn’t ready to give it up. I was enjoying our nursing sessions and the bonding time we had during them. It was a calming and special time that I couldn’t let go of just yet. I was able to drop the mid-afternoon session by 13 months, and at 14 months I dropped the morning session, but I just couldn’t give up our last nighttime feeding. I loved being able to rock in the chair and nurse Mini Pbj to sleep every night. She looked so sweet and innocent falling asleep on me like that and I loved it. I had just started to entertain the idea of keeping the bedtime session for a few more months, when the unexpected happened. Mr Pbj won a trip through work; one that he needed me to go on. It was for 3 days. I was crushed. I knew that I couldn’t maintain my small supply while I was gone without pumping and I didn’t really want to start that again. So about a week before the trip, over a few days and several puddles of tears, I dropped our nighttime session. It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. Much harder than I ever expected it to be.

Motherhood is funny like that though; you think you have a plan until everything changes. You end up doing things you thought you wouldn’t and vice versa. I had no intentions of being a extended breastfeeding mama, but when it came down to it, that’s what I wanted to be. I didn’t think I would be so sensitive to questions from others about when I was going to quit, but I was. Looking back on the entire 15 months I don’t really have too much to complain about. I was able to nurse Mini Pbj, pump, build a stockpile, and wean, all without major issues. It was a wonderful experience that I wouldn’t trade for anything. It was painful at times, and required more effort and will power than I had anticipated, but it was worth every moment. Every second of clenched teeth, every tear, every milk spot on my shirt, every washed pump part, and every 3 am. feeding. I would do it all over again. Actually, that’s probably what I’m most looking forward to whenever a Mini Pbj #2 comes along.

What was breastfeeding like for you? Your favorite or least favorite part??