We’ve basically been living out of our diaper bag these days! Here’s what’s in there:
Think about the last time your child did something you felt required some sort of “disciplining.” What did you do? Did you give a time out? Did you talk it through, discussing what happened and what your child could do differently next time? Did you give a swat on the hand, or on the bottom? Employ a ‘natural consequence’? Now imagine that you are the parent of a challenging child and that these instances happen many, many times each day. How much energy and attention do you suppose you’d be giving to negative behaviors?
I always thought that I would be a natural consequences and discussion type of parent. Ellie doesn’t want to wear her jacket? She’ll be cold. Ellie doesn’t want to put her bike in the garage when she’s done playing with it? It might get backed over by a tractor. Depending on what her behavior is, we might also do some role playing or talk about ways to handle it: “I saw how frustrated you were when Tommy took the toy you were playing with! What do you think you could do next time instead of hitting?”
With Ellie, these methods seemed to backfire. Natural consequences? They were almost so novel to her that she would deliberately do things to see what would happen next. Talking? Holy cow did that ever just piss her off royally and add fuel to the fire. The more we would talk and try to calm her down by being understanding and empathetic, the more angry and hysterical she would become. It certainly didn’t seem to encourage her to employ any of the strategies we were so carefully trying to instill. We switched to time outs. She discovered really quick that there was nothing to keep her in the chair, and we decided that any method that relied on physical power-plays was dangerous; it would only work as long as she was physically small enough for us to dominate her, and it showed that the bigger person won simply by virtue of having larger muscles. We thought that was the wrong message to send. We moved to 123 Magic. Same result.
In my previous post about preparing for a sibling, reader Sparkles mentioned how she set up a basket of things for her older daughter to play with while she was nursing. It never occurred to me that I had a toddler who would need to be occupied during this time, and I really liked this idea.
When I had Drake we lived in a one level condo and I preferred nursing in the bedroom on the bed. I could stretch my feet out and have the TV running to keep me entertained (Drake would nurse for hours sometimes), as well as have the option of shutting the door to keep the pets out if I didn’t want them coming so close to the baby. In our current home, our bedroom is upstairs and Drake’s playroom is downstairs in the family room. Since I think I would still prefer the option of laying on the bed to nurse as well as keeping the pets out, I would need to keep Drake in the room with me so I could still supervise him and nurse Chocolate baby.
After reading Sparkles’ suggestions I have started creating my own nursing basket of things kept in our bedroom solely for the purpose of occupying Drake when we are there. I plan on telling him that these toys stay only in mommy and daddy’s room and that they are special for when mommy feeds the baby. Sparkles recommends quiet toys which makes sense, and for the most part I have stuck with that idea. Here are the things I have set aside for now:
I was inspired by Caroline’s post to create a DIY gift for my husband for Father’s Day. I thought a keychain was the perfect idea because it wouldn’t clutter up our house (as DIYs often do!) and it is sufficiently masculine. I wanted, however, for the baby to get involved and unfortunately he’s too little to do any detail work!
I had seen air-dry clay thumbprint pendants floating around on Pinterest, but I wanted something sturdier since keys tend to get tossed around, and something that looked a little more finished and professional since my husband would carry it with him all the time. I came up with a polymer clay pendant nestled inside a bezel. I loved the result, and my husband loved his handmade present (pun intended!). You could use this same DIY to make a necklace, a fob, or a holiday or window ornament.
Dear Elliot & Finn,
Today is our last day at home together before I return to work. Tomorrow, I will send you off into the world at 14-weeks old; though I realize 14 weeks is far longer than many mothers have with their babies, it is far earlier than I would wish to have you in the care of others. In a perfect world, little boys, I would stay with you every day to laugh and play and snuggle and learn and cry, just like we’ve done for the last three months. I would give almost anything for the gift of being with you, but I hope someday you will realize that mommies and daddies often have to do things they don’t want to do because they know it will be best for their family.
Before I send you out into this great big world, I have a few wishes and wisdoms for you.
I had pinned the most darling bear mirror when pregnant with my daughter, having aims of creating a subtle woodland-themed nursery for her. No longer available, I set about trying to easily recreate the bear mirror, finally settling on cork as a substitute for wood (I haven’t ventured much beyond straight cuts with my jigsaw!)
I love how it turned out and hope you do too. I provided a template below for the bear shape, but since cork can be easily cut and manipulated, the options for different animal and shape silhouettes is nearly endless.
We have an L shaped couch, and Chloe had been cruising along the couch for a few weeks. She let go of the couch on the day she turned 7 months and took exactly two steps from one side of the couch to the other (from the couch side to the chaise). I nearly had a heart attack.
She was hooked. She kept doing this for weeks, and would let go of whatever she was cruising along to see how many steps she could take. She was much closer to 9-10 months before she was walking unassisted and closer to 11 months before she was running.
We had one walker, but she didn’t use it as one. She is a daredevil and was happier cruising and seeing what she could let go of and how far she could walk on her own.
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