Hellobee

Dear Baby Y,

I usually keep your monthly updates a little more informative and a little less personal, but I couldn’t resist writing directly to you on your first birthday. Yep, your first birthday. Wow.

This might win me Worst Blogger of the Year Award, but we didn’t throw you an elaborate party. There will be plenty of time for parties when you’re older and really will look forward to them. We did have a quiet celebration with your grandparents a week ago, and you had your first taste of cake. (Your dad didn’t want you to have any, but I put my foot down. You’re welcome, buddy.)

Mmmmm … cake.

Your personality is emerging more and more every day.  For the most part, you’re still my mellow little guy. You’ve become quite the snuggle bunny, too, which I love. However, the toddler in you is starting to emerge – if you’re hungry or tired and a toy doesn’t bend to your will, sometimes you’ll scream and fling it across the room. Also, you don’t hesitate to let me know when I’m taking too long to prepare a meal for you. For the record, “too long” is pretty much any period of time over 30 seconds.

Speaking of food, you continue to amaze us with your freakish appetite. You have no problem polishing off adult-size plates of most anything we give you. Sometimes we have to scatter pieces of food all over your high-chair tray so that you don’t try to shove so much into your mouth at once. Your favorite foods are bananas, blueberries, cantaloupe, tofu, steamed carrots, cheese, chicken, and good ol’ Cheerios. You happily dine out with us and don’t disturb other patrons … as long as we don’t run out of food, that is.

Taking a class at the local baby gym … you were the only non-walker!

We still nurse three times a day: When you wake up, before your afternoon nap, and before bedtime. I recently stopped nursing you mid-morning in our first official step toward weaning. Thankfully, you haven’t seemed to mind all that much – I’m sure the fact that you inhale table food helps.

You sleep about 11 hours a night. Usually you wake up once, and I never know when that will be – sometimes it’s only a few hours after going to bed, sometimes it’s 1 a.m., sometimes it’s 5 a.m. Every once in a while, I can soothe you back to sleep without nursing, but it’s rare. The other night I let you cry, because we both know you do not need those calories, but you got so worked up that I gave in. You still take a reliable morning nap, but if I let you sleep for more than an hour, you’ll fight your afternoon nap. Then I have to resort to driving you around while you snooze so you aren’t a terror at bedtime.

Happy in the BOB on a recent walk around the neighborhood. You always cross your legs so nicely.

You aren’t walking yet, and you don’t seem terribly interested in it since you can crawl so fast. (In fact, you’ve recently figured out that if you put your head down when you crawl, you’ll be more aerodynamic!) But you can stand for short periods on your own, and I know that will turn into a step or two sooner or later. While part of me is in no rush, I’m looking forward to how much more you’ll be able to do, like actually enjoy the playgrounds and splash pads in our new city. It’s also funny to see kids who are so much smaller than you already walking – most of them are older, but because you’re such a big guy, no one would ever know it.

You’ve got a two-word vocabulary right now: “Dada” (which you use on both Papa Y and me) and sometimes “ball.” You understand an awful lot, though. The other night I asked you if you wanted to take a bath, and without missing a beat, you took off for the bathroom door, grinning from ear to ear. I can ask you to find certain toys or give your stuffed kiwi a hug. You’ll even fetch specific books. I finally taught you to wave, but it’s spotty – you most enjoy doing it when I wave to you in the mirror in the car.

Cheesin’ it up during playtime at the mall.

You’ve become a voracious reader, which I love. We sit on the floor of your nursery while you fish books from their storage bins and hurl them at me. (I’m trying to teach you that you don’t actually have to throw them … all in good time, I suppose.) You sit and listen pretty well, though you do try to speed things up sometimes by turning the pages yourself. Your favorite books include “Don’t Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus” or any other “Pigeon” book, “Biscuit’s Pet and Play Halloween” (you like feeling the soft kitty) “Dear Zoo” (you like finding the animals under the flaps) and, funnily enough, “Goodnight iPad,” a parody of “Goodnight Moon” that I got your dad for Father’s Day.

I’ve had a little bit of a rough time adjusting to full-time motherhood, but you should know that it’s not because I don’t love you to pieces. I’m so grateful that I’ve been around for most of your first year. But I do miss interacting with adults and feeling challenged in a professional role, so I’ve been considering going back to work. Ultimately, even if I don’t get quite as much time with you, it might make me a better, happier mom who won’t take any moment with you for granted. We’ll see. All I know is that I have to be honest with myself, and that teaching you to do the same is a very valuable lesson.

Just one year ago, you were a brand new, tiny, sleepy creature. Today you’re an energetic, affectionate 1-year-old – and a living, breathing example of how fast time flies. It’s so true what they say: The days are long, but the years are short … and there’s no pause button to be found.

I love you like crazy, buddy.

– Mama

Then and now.