You’d think that because I already have one child, I would have a better handle on sleep with my second, but unfortunately that hasn’t been the case. Sienna is almost 11 months and still doesn’t sleep through the night. In fact only in the last 2 weeks has she gone from 4-5 wake-ups at night to 1. I’m kind of afraid to actually say that out loud because it’s been an off and on pattern with her no matter what I do. Every time I think I’ve figured out her sleep patterns, she does a 360 on me and I feel like a complete failure in the sleep department. Meanwhile Mavrick was sleeping through the night at 8 weeks.
Sienna on the other hand, has been a completely different story. She is one crappy sleeper. I tried co-sleeping, sleep training, giving her more food closer to bedtime… but she was up every night just as I was putting my head down on the pillow to sleep. I tried CIO on several occasions and it failed every time. Maybe I just didn’t let her fully cry it out enough because I was afraid she would wake her brother up, and who wants 2 kids up at 1am in the morning. And even though I told myself co-sleeping wasn’t something we would do, when your child doesn’t sleep and you are exhausted, you put everything you said you would or would not do aside. Co-sleeping became my best friend until we decided to break the pattern at 8 months because I needed more rest when I went back to work.
I was scared to stop co-sleeping because I had a feeling I would be up often. But it wasn’t as bad as I thought. I slowly reduced the number of times I would bring her to bed with me. She had been sleeping in her crib and then I would bring her into my bed when she would wake up around 1-2am. To break the pattern, I put her back in her crib when she woke up and let her cry it out instead of bringing her into our bed. But if she got up again, I would bring her to bed with me. Eventually I went from co-sleeping from 1am – 7am, to bringing her into my bed at increasingly later times – 3am, 4am then 5am. It only took about a week to transition her back to her crib full-time, but that didn’t result in less wake-ups.
Now that she started daycare, she’s actually been sleeping much better. She went from 4-5 wake ups at night to 1 or 2. I think the fact that she doesn’t sleep as much in the daytime anymore was the main reason for the improvement. Sienna was a heavy day napper, taking anywhere from 3-4 naps a day, but cutting her naps back to 2 a day helped her sleep better at night. To be honest I was just so overwhelmed with fatigue, that it seemed like nothing I did helped. Looking back now though, I realize I tried everything BUT try to reduce her naps.
Two children from the same parents, raised the same way were completely different in the sleep department. That makes me wonder how much of it is what we did, and how much depends on whether your child is a naturally good or bad sleeper.
What do you think was the key in your child becoming a good sleeper? And do you have two kids on opposites of the sleep spectrum like I do?
pomegranate / 3414 posts
This is my life. DD started sleeping 7PM-6AM at about 12 weeks. DS is currently 8m and is getting up 2-3 times a night.
pomelo / 5178 posts
It’s funny how two kids who share so much can be so different.
Both of kids were really terrible sleepers for the first year and then, like magic, started sleeping infinitely better around one year. I have no idea why; they just finally decided it was time to get some sleep!
coconut / 8305 posts
I sleep trained G. He was always a decent sleeper, but I did have to “re-train” after sickness or routine interruptions like when we went out of town. We co-slept off & own through toddler hood and from around 5 to current he sleeps in his bed, has no issue with bed time, and only occasionally wakes up.
With P, at 13 months, we co-sleep and co-bed with a sidecar setup. She goes to sleep fine on her own for naps & bedtime and when she wakes/stirs through the night she nurses. No sleep training here. I feel much different about infant sleep now than I did when G was little (I was MUCH younger & took to the need of sleep training from my mom & MIL). Now I see her wakings as normal so I don’t think she’s a “bad” or “good” sleeper. I know that through the years she find her groove & I’m sure like G, leave the need to co-bed entirely.
grapefruit / 4923 posts
my friend had twins and said even though she did the same things with both of them, they were very different sleepers. it taught her how much of it was not in her control.
blogger / persimmon / 1398 posts
My son is a horrible sleeper. Things have been much, much better since I started following his lead… and finally (finally!) at almost five, things are almost “good.” He’s either sleeping mostly through the night, or just bringing himself into our room and sneaking in our bed. Now that I’m getting some decent sleep, I may actually address the problem. Rather than just survive.
squash / 13764 posts
Can I ask how you reduced her naps from 3 to 2? I feel like LO also might be sleeping too much during the day, but he seems like he really NEEDS his 3 naps, or else he is just so so tired. But his night sleep is crap.