Hellobee

Last time I wrote about the loss of our dog and how our children dealt with it.  After dealing with the death and loss, we decided it would be a good idea to get another dog.  I know most people think I am crazy.  Four kids and two dogs is a lot, but Mr. Train and I felt that it would be the best thing for our kids and our other dog if we looked for another pet.  Both Mr. Train and I have had dogs all of our lives and we felt confident we could make a good choice for our family.  We wanted to find a great companion for our other dog and our kids, and we wanted to find it at a local shelter rather than a breeder or pet store.

I know a lot of couples have their fur babies first and have to worry about bringing a baby home.  Everyone worries about socializing their dogs and getting them ready to accept a new baby, but what about socializing our kids to get them ready for a new pet?  As adults, we make choices about the pets we bring into our home like are we home enough for a puppy or active dog, or do we have enough space for a large breed or should we stay with a small to medium dog?  With kids all the same concerns apply, but we also have to take into account the safety and well-being of our children.  So here was the process Mr. Train and I went through to find a new dog for our family from a shelter.

1. What size dog?

I think before getting into breeds it’s most important to think size.  Within every size range there are dogs that tend to be labeled as good with children, so it is best to consider what life with that pet might look like.  Things I consider when thinking about size of dogs is space for them, the power and strength the dog have, and how big they would be compared to my kids.

I knew that we wanted a medium to large breed dog.  We wanted to stay away from the small breeds and giant breeds because of how our kids interact with animals.  The kids wanted to be involved in the care of our new dog and I didn’t want to make that more difficult by having a dog that would outweigh them by 150 pounds… sorry Great Danes (a breed I have always wanted to have).  I also know my kids are pretty rough and tumble so I didn’t want a small or toy breed because I was afraid my kids would hurt the dog accidentally… sorry pugs and Shih Tzus but my kids would squash you.

2. What activity level can we handle?

Some dog breeds are inherently more active and can, in fact, be troublesome if they are not given proper exercise.  Some dogs require several brisk and long walks a day or they may start to exhibit unruly behavior.  Huskies are notorious for being high energy and many end up in shelters because their owners cannot provide the exercise they need.  My kids are very active and can definitely handle playing with a dog, but realistically we could not do more than one walk a day.

3. What breed?

I think this can be the most fun part about selecting a pet.  That might be because I love the history of dog breeds and the science behind their evolution (but that’s just the nerd in me talking).  I think it is also one of the most important parts.  The ASPCA’s book Complete Guide to Dogs is so helpful when looking at breeds.  Not only does it give you a ton of information about bringing a pet into your home and training suggestions, but it goes over some basics of most of the breeds.  For each breed it has a set of simple symbols to tell you if the dog has special exercise needs, is high energy in doors, needs special grooming, is a good watch dog or is good with kids.  I think it’s important to know some of the breed standards for behavior, health and size, and average life span.  Every dog is an individual and should be considered as such, but there are trends within a breed and it’s good to be prepared for that.

Since we were getting a dog from a shelter, we needed to not only look at our desired breeds but also take into account the ones we didn’t want. One breed we absolutely cannot have is pit bulls or pit mixes.  I know most people think it’s because of their reputation, but that is not why they were off our list.  It was simply because our homeowner’s insurance does not allow them.  It is something to consider if you are or will soon be a home owner.  Some of the other breeds that are not allowed or might cause your premiums to go up with certain insurance agencies are Chows, Doberman Pinschers, German Shepherds, Rottweilers, and Huskies.  I also personally didn’t want to deal with the skin allergies or respiratory issues that can come with breeds like bulldogs, sharpeis, or other short nosed breeds.  So after some debate, Mr. Train and I decided to look for labs or golden retrievers.

4. What age?

Shelters usually place their dogs into the following categories; puppy (0-1 year), young (1-3 years), adult (3+ years), and senior (last 25% of the average life span for the breed).  Each age group comes with its pros and cons that should be considered.  Puppies are adorable but need a lot of training.  Young dogs are past their puppy teeth, still have puppy energy and possibly might be trained.  Adult dogs tend to be slightly less energetic and less likely to chew. A lot of them are already house trained and it would just be a matter of training them to a new home.  Senior dogs are usually less active and may come with some health issues that begin in the later years for dogs, but they could still be a great companion for several years.

I knew I did not want a puppy, although I could have gone with slightly less than a year.  I just wanted a dog that was past its puppy teeth stage which is usually around 8 months.  Those teeth are sharp and puppies like to play without knowing how hard they bite.  It’s just not the best match for toddlers and babies.  I didn’t want an adult or senior dog because we just went through the loss of a pet and I wanted whatever dog we picked to be with us for a long time.  So we decided to try and find a young dog, maybe around the one year mark.

1. Decide when to involve the kids

My children are all under five and we just dealt with the heartache that comes with the loss of a pet.  I wanted them to feel like they were a part of the process, but I didn’t want them getting their hopes up and not having it work.  We decided to look at nearby shelters, narrow down some possibilities, meet the dog first and then involve the kids.  I wanted to be as careful as I could before I brought the kids in to meet a dog.  I think older children could be involved more because they would be mature enough to understand the limitations of shelter dogs.  It’s hard for kids to understand that not all dogs are a perfect match for our family.

2. Start online.

I found that most shelters in my area had their own web site, listed some dogs on craigslist, or were a part of a larger dog listing service.  This allowed me to get an idea for what was out there all from the comfort of my home and while my kids were in bed. We used petfinder.com.  It’s a site that advertises for over 13,000 shelters and rescue groups in US, Mexico and Canada.  It uses your zip code and you can search for shelters or individual animals.  The one thing I would recommend is to not get your heart too set on an animal you see online.  Their information could be incomplete or not up to date, but it is definitely a good starting point.

3. Visit the shelter

If a shelter has listed its animals online, you can go in and inquire about that exact animal or you can explain your preferences to them.  At this point I think it’s so important to feel comfortable with the people working there.  Get a feel for whether they want to just get rid of dogs or whether they are truly interested in helping connect pets with the perfect family.  If they talk to you about every animal they have, most likely they are not taking all of your needs into consideration.  The employees should have some knowledge of the dogs they have and a general idea of personality.  They may have to look at the tags on the dogs’ cages to be reminded, but they should have an idea ahead of time.  It is also important to remember decisions about breed and age that have already been made.  There are a lot of cute dogs in those shelters and I am the type of person who wants to bring them all home. (They had some 8 week old puppies that seriously tested my resolve to have a young dog rather than a puppy.)

Mr. Train and I went into a shelter and told them we wanted a large breed like a lab or retriever that was older than 8 months, good with other dogs and good with kids.  We went in thinking that there may not be any dogs that fit the bill, but maybe we could keep our application on record in case one came up.  Out of 100+ dogs they recommended 3 to us.  Although it wasn’t a lot to choose from, it made me comfortable knowing they were really taking my needs into consideration.  They took us around the facility and showed us the three and asked if we wanted to interact with any of them.  We picked a two year old shepherd/lab/possibly weimaraner mix. He was perfect.  He was mellow but still had a little puppy pep.  He wasn’t too big and at 2 years old he won’t get any taller, maybe just fill out a little as he ages.  He played gently and walked nicely with us, but he hadn’t passed the whole test yet.   He had to meet the rest of the family.

Please stay tuned for Part II and how to introduce your kids to a new dog, and bringing a new dog home.

Quick snap shot after meeting “Jake.” Please excuse my appearance — I wasn’t planning on being in pictures.

Have you ever brought a new pet into your home after having kids?  What were some choices you made in selecting a pet?