To My Sweet James:

This week you turned five.  I look at you and I am amazed at the little boy you have become.  There is no more toddler left at all.  You are a full blown little kid.  We had a great couple of weeks celebrating your birthday with you.  You really ended up milking your birthday this year.  You had a cake at your birthday party (2 weeks ago), some cake the day before your birthday with our family dinner, a fun cupcake dessert at a dinner on your actual birthday while we were driving to San Francisco, and then your Aunt gave you a cake while we were visiting with her.  I think that’s a pretty lucky little guy.  Not many people get four birthday cakes and songs.  You loved every minute of it.  You laughed and sang along with us, then asked us to sing again.

Your smile is still infectious.  It always has been.  Since you were a baby, you have had the biggest and cutest dimples.  I love seeing your smile and hearing your laugh.  I think part of that is because you are a very serious little guy.  You are very thoughtful and quiet but then once you get started with your brothers, your laugh just fills the room.  When you get the giggles the rest of us can’t help but laugh along with you.


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You are a caring and honest person.  Your preschool teachers are amazed at how sensitive and empathetic you are to your friends.  You still like to tease and you and your brothers really go at it sometimes, but if someone is hurt or sad I can see it in your face that you truly hurt for that person and that is a beautiful part of your heart that shines through.

We decided to put you in a second year of preschool this year and pulled you from the district’s Transitional Kindergarten Program.  We thought it was a better fit for you and you have been thriving and learning in your new school.  You and your brothers are in the same class and the way you have handled the transitions makes me so proud of you.


Every day I see how you have grown and what you are learning.  In the last several months you have learned to spell and write your name.  It was a big accomplishment that brought tears to my eyes.  I have so much hope and love for you that every time you meet a goal, I am overcome with pride and joy.  You have almost mastered the two wheeler with no training wheels, but I think that is going to take a little more practice.  I know you can do it. We just have to build up your confidence.

We have had some rough days, you and I.  I think we are both very similar: quiet and stubborn.  Sometimes it feels like we are two bulls with our horns locked.  But I think in the quiet moments after a fit or tantrum, we have the chance to really connect and try to understand each other.  In those times when we get to talk about what happened and apologize (even mommy has to apologize sometimes) for our actions, I really feel like I can connect with you.  When you hug me and say I love you mommy, my heart just explodes.


To my oldest son, you are the one that started this whole crazy family we have.  You were the first to steal my heart away and call me mommy.  Every day is an adventure and I am looking forward to seeing what life with a five year old is like.

Love always,

Your momma