Hellobee

A few weeks ago, Scribble and I both started back to school!  I work part time as an instructor at a local junior college, and this semester I am teaching two classes. Additionally, this year I started back to graduate school, and am taking classes part-time, and soon will begin interning in a middle school.  Our transition from home to school has been full of fits and starts!

Up until now, Scribble has been at home with me all day.  I worked at night when my husband was available to stay with him.  But this semester my college needed daytime instructors.  We had come to rely on the money I made, plus I really enjoyed teaching and appreciated the structure it brought to our schedule.  Scribble would be two when the semester started. Two sounded like an ideal age to introduce Scribble to a more structured environment. We decided that Scribble would go twice a week for half the day.

Finding childcare in my rural community was a little bit of a challenge!  There are only two daycare centers in our town, and one has a long waiting list, so we really only had one option. It was pretty basic, lacking the many bells and whistles I had heard about from our friends in the city. I had to check my wish-list with regards to activities, staff education, and the menu. However, the staff were extremely kind and accommodating, and we felt Scribble would be very well cared-for there. After taking care of Scribble full-time for two years, I was used to having full control over what he ate, his toys, his media exposure, and his interaction with other children.  I decided to take a leap of faith with the hope that my fears were just the unfounded anxieties of a first-time mom.

Then, much to our surprise, we heard through the grapevine that a Montessori daycare– the first and only one within 25 miles– was being built in our county, about fifteen minutes from home. The school is publicly funded. We visited the school while it was under construction, and enrolled him that day. It was a real thrill to see such a beautiful school in our area. What a resource this place will be to our community!

Around the time I scheduled my classes to teach next spring, I started toying with the idea of going back to school myself. Over the summer I worked on my application, studied for and took my entrance exam, and was accepted. The program is a hybrid of online coursework and in-person internship hours.

The summer ended and we began preparing for a busy fall. I called the Montessori school to let them know our start date, and found out that the school would not be open in time for Scribble to start there! This made me pretty anxious, because I didn’t want to start Scribble at the first daycare, then transition him to a new place soon afterward. I thought about hiring a part-time, temporary nanny, but it can be difficult to find someone willing to drive to my house, since we are a little remote. I thought about asking family and friends to fill in, but decided it would be too stressful to have such an erratic schedule.

We eventually decided it would be easiest to put Scribble in the original daycare so he would have a consistent environment.  I have a long commute and must be at work at 8 AM.  So we decided Dad would handle drop-offs. At the time I was really anxious about Scribble starting school, and having Dad do drop off has really helped me manage my anxiety.

For the first week, Scribble did really well at daycare. He didn’t even cry! Meanwhile, I was basking in the happy glow of having returned to work and school (and the occasional Starbucks study session). This balance is really perfect for me.
Once he realized our new routine, though, Scribble started to act out. He cries at drop-off and has more tantrums at home. A few weeks before Scribble started daycare, he entered a very clingy phase, and school has only exacerbated his anxiety. His sleep also took a major hit. Surprisingly he naps fine at daycare, but has difficulty settling down at home. This summer we had to transition to a toddler bed early, after Scribble learned how to climb out of his crib. He sleeps on a floor bed now, and wants me to lay with him on my days off. He has also started waking up early because he wants to climb into our bed. Honestly, all of this sounds like the behavior of a typical two year old, so I’m not sure how much of it can be attributed to starting school. But naturally, I do feel some guilt about returning to work and to my studies. I enjoy it so much, and feel it makes me a more engaged mom. But I hate that my son is having such a hard time adjusting to all these big changes.

To manage this, we’ve basically put ourselves on house arrest, and are living the way we did when Scribble was an infant. If Scribble isn’t in school, we are at home or nearby. I try to do errands and schedule appointment for my workdays, and we’ve started saying no to travel opportunities, and family and social obligations. My work schedule requires me to be an early riser, which in turn has meant that we all get in bed earlier and wake earlier. We are hoping that in a month we’ll start to see an improvement in Scribble’s behavior, and can start being more flexible with our schedule. In a few weeks he will begin going to school four days a week, which might also help him to feel more comfortable there.

This week, Scribble’s Montessori school opened!  I was anxious about starting him at a new school all over again.  He had only just started to bond with the staff at his last school when we pulled him out.  The new school is beautiful and the staff are so attentive and professional, but it still hurt my heart to leave him there on the first day.  But when I picked him up, his teacher told me he did very well!  We are enjoying the structure of the Montessori environment and hope it will be a good fit for him for years to come.

As far as my classes go, I am really only able to take each day on its own terms.  I try to keep up with the work I have scheduled for the week, and I let anxieties about future projects go.  I will admit I’ve seen a marked improvement in my work ethic since I started back.  I am able to use my time between classes to get a lot of my work done, and a little studying as well.  The rest I do at night, or on weekends. Each week presents new challenges!  I used to procrastinate, but now I don’t have that luxury!  Plus, these days I appreciate work and school so much more than I did before, and know how much everyone in my family is doing to help make this happen for me.  That provides me with a lot of motivation!

Any bees out there juggling parenthood and school?  I would love to hear about your daily routine and strategies for managing stress!