Hellobee

In the United States, November is recognized as “National Adoption Month.” The particular focus of this month is the adoption of children currently in the foster care system. Clearly, we did not adopt our boys through the foster care system. But that doesn’t mean that we don’t enjoy marking this month as a reason to celebrate all adoptive families, and each unique journey.

That said, I was planning to stay a little quieter than normal on the subject this year. Mostly because I’m still coming to terms with our last process. While one day I know I will see the journey to Pint-Sized Picasso as perfect and rewarding, I’m currently still working through the bitterness that I feel about the process and all the changes. (And who knows, maybe I will never be over it!) Plus, while an adoptive family… we are an international adoptive family. I hadn’t figured out how to speak to such an important topic, as someone who hasn’t actually “been there, done that [exactly].” I was struggling to find my voice on the subject.

Then—unprompted—Mini Michelangelo asked me about it. We were digging through a bin of fabric looking for the perfect piece of fabric for a project. He pulled out a length of fabric and said, “This would make a great pillowcase!” I must have looked at him funny because he followed it up with, “You know for the kids in the pictures!” And then I must have really looked confused because he rolled his eyes, and said in that I-am-six-and-am-clearly-smarter-than-my-mother voice, “The ones who need homes?!?!”

The photos in the mall and the children’s museum of children in foster care that I make sure to slow down and appreciate. The children waiting for their forever families. And the pillowcases? Those are part of a local program to gift children in foster care with something that is truly theirs. Last year, Mini and I made some to donate. With all of the last minute, holiday travel to Korea for court… I had forgotten all about that. But he hadn’t.

So we talked about adoption, and foster care, and the significance of National Adoption Month. And it reminded me that it’s always worth mentioning. Or in this case, blogging about. It’s not too early to start conversations, even if it’s just a comment or two mixed into every day topics. It can be shown through the simplest of actions. It’s about slowing down and appreciating the photos hanging in your mall. Or taking a moment to check out the AdoptUSKids site. Maybe now is the time to check out ABC Family’s show, “The Fosters” that you have heard so much about! (And if you haven’t heard about it… check.it.out. It’s a wonderful portrayal of some of the issues we adoptive families face.)

Foster care and adoption is not for everyone. It really, really isn’t. But… knowledge and education is.

Yes, I have a lot of mixed emotions on the process and our adoption journey. Some of them are very negative. Yet, when someone says “adoption,” the feeling that leaps to the front of my mind [in flashing neon letters, if you will] is “THANKFUL.” I am so very, very grateful for the role adoption has played in my life. Words can not express the feeling that wells up in my chest when I think about how my boys would not be my boys without adoption. It’s National Adoption Month. And it’s November. I absolutely cannot think of a better month for the country to acknowledge and celebrate adoption.

If you want to read more:

• Hellobee has a series on “National Adoption Month” where you can read posts from a bunch of us on our experiences.
• There is a ton of information on the Child Welfare site, the National Council for Adoption site, and—of course—the AdoptUSKids site.
• There is a fabulous site for National Adoption Day (November 22nd!) … I especially like how clearly they convey both the facts and the myths about the foster care system, and the children currently in it.