Nannies, nanny-shares, government day care, au pairs – when you live in a large metro area (particularly DC), the options for childcare are endless and choosing is a real, well, choice. When I was heading back to work, we chose a small at-home daycare between our house and the public transit I take to work every day. It was a decision we made very quickly, after only touring one other small daycare, but it has worked out so beautifully that I am often amazed at our luck. We have found countless benefits to Will spending the majority of his days at someone’s home with a small group of other children – many we didn’t know to expect when we first spent time researching child care options. There are, of course, a few drawbacks, which are beginning to be more important to me as time goes on.

I’m at a place where I’m evaluating our experience, and I thought I’d share my reflections with you all, in case your considering a small, at home daycare. Share your thoughts and experiences with me in the comments, too!

Quick Summary of our At-home Daycare

Will spends his days at a home with three caregivers, three other toddlers (he is the oldest, and the age ranges are 13 months to 19 months), a few preschool aged children who hang out part-time/after school only, plus the main caregiver/homeowner’s children, as she homeschools. Her kids are now 3, 8, 11, and 15, I think. Will is incredibly close to the 3 year old girl and 8 year old boy, one of the preschoolers, and views them as older siblings.

Benefits of a Small/ At-home Daycare

1) Strong Personal Relationship from Newborn to Toddler and Beyond – Will has had the same three women caring for him since his very first foray in childcare. Rather than moving from room to room as he has grown and meeting new adults, he has seen the same faces day in and day out for nearly eighteen months. They recognize every new development – from new words and sentences he is forming, to his hair length and new shoes. The bond he has with these women is deep, and he actively gives them hugs and kisses each morning and evening – proof, to me, that he has affection for them.

2) A Second Voice of Reason – Since Will has the same three women in his life, they often spend as much time caring for him as I do, and have suggestions for his development and growth. (Plus, they have YEARS of parenting experience under their belt and between the three of them, raised something like 15 children.) Will’s napping schedules and habits nearly always formed at daycare and passed to us, which was amazing because we learned what they did to form good habits and copied them at home. When I’ve questions or concerns about new occurrences in Will’s behavior or health, their advice has been invaluable.

3) Intimate Group of Friends – Will has a few built in best friends at daycare, and they haven’t changed nearly at all since he began going to his daycare. These kids have become his siblings, and they act as such (if I have to see Will walk in to daycare just to steal another toddler boy nearly exactly his age/height’s toy!). This is likely true of many daycares, I’d think!

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4) Learning and Growing from Watching – From this group of friends – many older than him, and few younger – I am 100% convinced that he has learned so many skills that pushed his development. He has had more words than I could have expected at his age, he walked somewhat early, and I’d guess his love of music and tendency to sing are because he mimics the kids he spends time with day in and day out. I also believe he has shown an ability to listen to directions and show kindness because of daycare. I often hear his older preschool friends telling him to ‘go here’ and ‘do this’ and he loves to learn what they mean and follow directions. He sees them be kind to each other – apologize when needed, cover each other with blankets at nap time, and the like – and displays the same behavior.

5) Cost – For us, by far, at home daycare is the most cost effective. Full transparency: we pay $1000/month for all day, year round daycare. Our caregivers take two weeks paid vacation – one week over the winter holidays and another mid summer.

6) Nutrition – As our daycare is part of the national program that provides food to schools, Will has two snacks and lunch covered (plus breakfast, if we’d want it) by daycare. The best part is that lunch is always homemade – and often, we’re told, Will steals his second family’s personal food, which is usually a yummy Thai or Filipino dish. Snacks are usually fruit, yoghurt and crackers. Unsurprisingly, Will LOVES rice dishes, food with lots of flavor (kid won’t eat chicken unless it’s basically covered in some kind of spice!), and fruit.

7) Flexibility – Despite having firm opening/closing hours, we’ve had the ability to bring Will early the few times it’s been absolutely necessary, and when I’m running late, I’m not given any grief.

8) A Second Family 0 No three people know Will’s temperament, personality, and areas for growth (besides Mr. Milk and I – though sometimes, they know even better!). We’ve been lucky enough to spend time together with Will’s second family on weekends, at birthday parties, social gatherings and the like.

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Will practicing his standing and walking in early days, outside with his daycare family.

Drawbacks of a Small/ At-home Daycare:

1) Verbal Information – Of course, no situation is perfect. One of the more frustrating aspects of our at home daycare is the lack of physical/written reports at the end of each day. During Will’s first year, they kept a diligent hourly record of naps, eating and pooping, but there is no standard ‘Daily Record’ sheet with anecdotes, notes about how time was spent or how he ate or slept. Mr. M and I typically ask how the day was and get some information about how he ate and slept, but nothing beyond that. Sometimes I wish I had something that more formally captured his daily routines and deviances from them.

As a side note to this, there is also no streaming video or the like, as some care places offer. Sometimes I’d love to be able to quickly check in to see how Will is on my lunch hour.

2) Shorter Hours – While some at home daycares have more traditional hours (7 AM to 6 PM, say), our daycare’s hours are 8AM-5PM. This makes work tricky, since my commute is 75 minutes and subject to public transit delays. The flexibility makes this doable, but because it’s someone’s home, and not a larger place with shifts/hours, the times are more stringent and specific.

3) Social Opportunities – As much as I love the consistency in Will’s caregivers, part of the value of a larger center where children meet new caregivers each year or so is that they learn to adjust, grow, adapt to new people. That’s definitely a reason to enjoy larger care centers, or varying up nannies every few years!

So, what are your thoughts? What do you love and not so love about your childcare situation?