One of the joys of having two children is watching their bond grow over time. I believe it’s so important to help foster a good relationship between siblings right from the start. I haven’t had to deal with much conflict between the girls just yet because Baby Pizza is 10 months old and only in recent months became much more vocal and opinionated. Still, creating positive interactions early on can only help the relationship to grow beautifully. Here are some things that have been helpful for us  so far!

Avoid frustrating situations before they arise.

Baby Pizza is often found playing with toys that are inappropriate for her, like Lil’ Pizza’s Magnatiles. Before Baby Pizza gets too engrossed in something that Lil’ Pizza is playing with (and can easily destroy), I will ask Lil’ Pizza to help me find toys for her little sister. She likes that she knows how to select good and appropriate toys for Baby Pizza.

20150911_112927
Lil’ Pizza was so proud of all the toys she found to surround Baby Pizza.

Allow opportunities for bonding to happen naturally.  

Lil’ Pizza has enjoyed singing to Baby Pizza before I put her down in the crib. It doesn’t always work in my favor because Baby Pizza often gets too excited when Lil’ Pizza is in the room. However, when Lil’ Pizza initiates something that she wants to do for Baby Pizza, I try to allow for such moments to happen and then praise her for being the best sister.

ADVERTISEMENT

 Try not to blame the baby.

If I am out with the girls and want to go home soon to nap Baby Pizza, I will phrase it in a way that doesn’t sound like I am putting the blame on Baby Pizza. Instead of saying something like, “Baby Pizza is getting tired and we need to go home for her to nap,” I will instead say, “Lil’ Pizza, it’s time for us to get going so that I can start making lunch.” I don’t want Lil’ Pizza to resent Baby Pizza and think she is the one taking away Lil’ Pizza’s fun.  At the same time, there are situations where I want them to understand that they need to stop what they are doing because of the other sibling (this goes both ways).

Have them enjoy a shared activity.

It’s nice to engage in activities that a 10 month old and a 3 year old can enjoy together! The other day, they had a lot of fun riding on swings at the same time. Baby Pizza and Lil’ Pizza enjoy their time together hearing stories, rolling around, playing in the pretend kitchen, and playing hide and seek (with a bit of help from me of course).

sisters
Big Pizza requested that they be mermaids together  |  Baby Pizza loved going down the slide with her big sister.

Talk about how much the baby loves and admires their older sibling.

Lil’ Pizza is always asking what Baby Pizza is thinking. She will ask me what Baby Pizza is thinking after she gives her a toy to play with or if we had to take a toy away from her. Lil’ Pizza actually asks me this question about almost everyone she knows, but when she is asking me about Baby Pizza, I always say something along the lines of how much Baby Pizza loves Lil’ Pizza or how she feels lucky to have such an awesome sister. Lil’ Pizza often then stands proudly with a huge grin. She loves being a big sister to Baby Pizza!

Talk about the ways they are great siblings to each other.

I try to praise Lil’ Pizza for being an awesome sister when she is being extra sweet to Baby Pizza. Today, Lil’ Pizza started to feed Baby Pizza some puff snacks to stop her from crying.  Even Baby Pizza likes to initiate sweet moments with her sister like laying down really close to her sister.

20160217_183907

What are some ways that you have helped to foster a positive relationship between siblings?