Growing up, our family would unwrap our gifts on Christmas Eve after we’d gone to mass and shared a meal with some close family friends. We would take turns unwrapping things, thanking the gift giver, commenting on other gifts, explaining the thought behind what we’d purchased. My mother always let us unwrap all of the gifts, but we couldn’t play with them right away. On Christmas day, we could play with a few of the toys, but after the two or three selected toys of the day, my brother and I could only open one new toy a day. Her theory behind this was that we would appreciate each of the gifts more if we could only open one each day.

After we had kids, I explained this idea to Mr. Dolphin and he looked at me like I had just told him that we weren’t going to have Christmas. For him, Christmas was a huge free-for-all, and he and his brother tore into their presents and opened everything at once.

Despite the differences in our upbringing, I thought that Mr. Dolphin and I had agreed to let Lion unwrap all of his gifts on Christmas day, but not play with them. I remember saying, “I want him to unwrap everything, but not open them” and Mr. Dolphin agreeing. Apparently, this was not clear to Mr. Dolphin who was still confused about how a child could possibly unwrap a gift but not play with it right away. Sure enough, Lion wanted to open every single present the minute it was unwrapped. He also wanted to tell our parents how much Lion loved the new toys when we called them that evening.

I don’t necessarily think that it has to be just a single present each day, but I do agree with my mom that the kids don’t need to open or play with every single gift on Christmas day. I want them to get enjoyment out of their gifts and, let’s face it, sometimes the novelty of a new toy is part of what provides the pleasure. Why not spread that out over the days after Christmas instead of all on Christmas day itself? I also find that holidays can be a bit overstimulating, so any efforts to reduce the general activity of Christmas is nice. With so many grandparents, some of whom go overboard with the gifts (one set of grandparents sent nine presents to the boys), it seems like overkill to play with all the toys in one day.

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Lion’s first Christmas resulted in way too much stuff! Mr. Dolphin and I each purchased one small gift for Lion, but with four sets of grandparents plus aunts, uncles and friends, this four-month-old ended up with so many gifts.

There are so many different approaches. I learned that one of my friends lets his child open up some of the toys, but keeps most of them in reserve, slowly doling them out over the following weeks or months. Another family I know only lets their child play with the gifts from Santa on Christmas, while the rest can only be played with after the thank you notes are written. I really like both of these approaches, too!

We’re not sure what the solution is (and we only have a few more days to figure it out), but it will probably be something in between one gift a day and carte blanche to open everything at once. I would also like to hold at least a couple of gifts in reserve for snow days or long weekends.

What is your approach to when your kids get to open up and play with their gifts?