As I recently shared, now that I’m almost 36 weeks pregnant, labor and delivery is really weighing on my mind. This is my third baby and my first two birth stories could not be more different from one another! With my first I was induced, followed by a C-section under general anesthesia. With my second, I had a fast unmedicated vaginal birth. Because of this, I know all too well that every baby and every pregnancy are different and a lot of what happens during birth is really not in our control.
That said, I know I will feel a lot better (and worry less) if I try to organize all the thoughts swirling in my mind. So I decided to make a birth plan.
I know birth plans get a bad rap for being inflexible, unrealistic, and even neurotic. But I think a simple birth plan can be a great way to really figure out what you are worried about, what you really want, and what is realistic. At the same time, I think any birth plan needs to be taken for what it is: a somewhat idealistic plan based on a ton of unknown factors. Which means there has to be a lot of flexibility because you really can’t know ahead of time what is going to be in the best interest of you or your child.
I didn’t make a birth plan before either of my previous labors and in all honesty, I’m probably not going to print this out and take it to the hospital with me, though I will be discussing my preferences with my doctor beforehand. More than anything I just want to organize my thoughts and wishes so I can go in feeling prepared.
With that said, this is my simple, flexible plan for baby #3:
- If at all possible, I would prefer a vaginal delivery. I feel more strongly about this than anything else. If a C-section is medically necessary, then I am ok with that – the most important thing by far is that I end up with a healthy baby, regardless of how he is born. However, I do think C-sections are often suggested in situations where they are not medically necessary, particularly when labor is taking too long or ‘failing to progress’. Before agreeing to a C-section, I want a clear explanation of why it is needed.
- If I do need a C-section, I prefer to have a spinal block rather than an epidural. I had an epidural during my first C-section and ended up needed general anesthesia because it was not working effectively. This meant I wasn’t even awake for my baby’s birth and also made recovery much slower.
- If I give birth vaginally, I want to try to give birth without an epidural. But if the pain isn’t manageable or this turns into a very long labor, I will definitely reconsider.
- I don’t want to induce labor or use any other special interventions to start labor unless it is necessary for the health of the baby or to prevent the need for a C-section. I believe my body and my baby know when they are ready better than anyone else.
And really that is it. This may seem overly short and sweet, but this will be my third time giving birth in the same hospital. I am familiar with a lot of their policies like encouraging all mothers to breastfeed and keeping newborns in the room with their parents, so I know I don’t need to request those things.
I also trust my doctor and the labor and delivery staff. I know my body very well and I know what kind of birth I would prefer, but I also know that I am not a doctor. While I have given birth twice, they have assisted women giving birth hundreds and hundreds of times. There is so much they know about the process and the potential complications that I don’t know (and don’t really want to know.) That doesn’t mean I won’t advocate for my own wishes and needs, but I also understand that in the end we are all working together to make sure that whatever birth looks like, my baby and I are both headed home afterwards healthy and happy.
Did you have a birth plan? And if so, did your birth go according to the plan? Do you feel like having a plan in place beforehand made a difference?
apricot / 400 posts
I think your birth plan sounds great! I had a birth plan both times and it was immensely helpful. Like you, I wanted a medication-free vaginal delivery, if at all possible. Since the nurses knew I didn’t want pain medication, it was never offered (which made it easier to stick with my goal). Also, since my doctor knew I wanted a medication-free birth, he gave me options when pitocin became medically necessary, like going on for an hour, and then off for an hour. Good luck!
apricot / 308 posts
I had a very flexible birth plan, I went in knowing my body has control but sometimes things don’t work out the way we want. I ended up with a 10hour pitocin induced labor (due to low fluids) even got to pushing when babes heart rate dropped to 53. Everything was discussed with myself (or my husband) and it was agreed that an epidural to rest would be helpful. After 2 hours of rest, I pushed for another 5 hours and he would not come down. It was discussed again with me that I had two options: try the vacuum ONE TIME then emergency c section or go ahead and complete a unplanned c section. I opted to go for the unplanned as my husband would not be allowed in if it was an emergency. I cried, it wasn’t what I wanted but with babes heart rate dropping so much it wasn’t worth the risk. In the end I’m glad I was flexible because his cord was wrapped around his neck twice, he was sunny side up, and his fists we’re by his eyes.
I think it’s okay to want a certain birth, but you also need to be willing to go with what life is handing you. A friend wasn’t willing to and ended up with a c section as well and has struggled with it since birth (4 years ago). I think myself with the “go with the flow attitude” saved me from the guilt that I would’ve had.
wonderful pea / 17279 posts
I had two birthplans and infant care instructions for the nurses. My initial plan was for an unmedicated birth. When I agreed to a schedule cesarean I updated the birthplan to reflect the changed circumstance. There’s definitely information and best practices that no matter how you deliver you can have preferences and some control in your treatment.
pomelo / 5524 posts
I had a birth plan for #1. It all went out the window when he got stuck in the birth canal and I developed a fever after 2 hours of pushing. At that point, I knew C-section was imminent. He ended up in the NICU due to having a fever as well (caused by my fever) as well as having respiratory issues from having meconium in his lungs.
With my second, I opted for a planned C-section. Given the small size of LO1, there wasn’t much of a chance of me having a baby naturally, and I thought it was the best choice for me given my high risk. So RCS was my birth plan, and it couldn’t have turned out more beautifully. It was so much more calm than LO1’s birth, and I enjoyed it much more.
blogger / cherry / 222 posts
@poppygirl15: That is awesome that your doctor and nurses really worked with you. I will have to remember that tip about the pitocin just in case.
blogger / cherry / 222 posts
@mrsmacSLP: I completely agree with this! I think it important to trust our bodies and know what we want but also know that a lot of factors just aren’t in our control. And I think that helps ease the guilt a lot of people feel later.
blogger / cherry / 222 posts
@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: Yes, definitely!
blogger / cherry / 222 posts
@2PeasinaPod: That is good to hear. As much as I don’t want another C-section, I’ve heard that the whole process including the recovery can be so much better the second time. Especially if it is scheduled and doesn’t follow an induction.