Apparently, I have a few parenting phrases I use often because BeBe echoes the words back to me before I can finish saying them. I truly sound like a mom of a big kid. But, I stand by my phrases because they work! So, ha! Here are my mom phrases or “momisms” as we call them around here.
“Asked and Answered” When BeBe was in preschool she asked “why” questions all day long because she was curious. Now when she asks the same why question repeatedly, it’s because she’s not happy with the answer. Like when she asks why can’t we eat ice cream for dinner? BeBe would pepper me with questions like this until I lost my patience. We both disliked those exchanges. Finally, we talked about how once she understands the reason we made a decision, she should not keep asking why. If she wants to raise a new point, that’s ok, otherwise it’s rude. If she falls back into peppering me with why questions like why I can’t wear a sundress in January, and I’ve already given a response. I just say, “asked and answered,” and she understands she needs to stop asking, or really explain her point if she thinks we don’t understand.
“Three Things!” Here’s a typical scenario when I have to pull out this mom phrase. I’m in the middle of a project and BeBe insists she can’t find something, like shin guards for soccer. In her mind it is something she needs right then, which means I have to stop what I’m doing to find it. Predictably, the item is exactly where I said it would be, but she didn’t look carefully. It makes me crazy! Now when BeBe asks for something, she first has to tell me three things she moved to find it. She usually finds the item when she does move three things searching for it. She has also learned that if I find the shin guards in the exact spot I told her they would be, just underneath soccer socks, I’m not helping her look next time. Also, if we are late to soccer practice, she has to tell the coach why. The phrase is definitely working.
“Mom’s off the clock,” Ok, I stole this phrase from a close relative who’s a mom and I love it. Eight o’clock is bedtime in our house. (Although, we are probably going to push that back later for BeBe soon). Once I’m done helping the kids with homework, baths, books, or whatever they need for the evening, I’m off the clock. If I know one or both of the kids is truly not tired, fine. They can read to themselves or each other, get their own cup of water, play quietly with toys, or play Legos while my husband and I relax in the other room. But they know momma is not doing anything for them unless they are sick or hurt to the point of needing an ER visit, because “Mom’s off the clock!”
blogger / pomegranate / 3044 posts
Love the three things idea – my boys are so bad at finding things! Will try it out
squash / 13208 posts
I told my 9 year old I was off duty one night and he rolled his eyes and said “Moms are never off duty”
Got that right kid
pear / 1998 posts
I should use “three things” with my husband! When he can’t find something I usually say sarcastically, “did you look with your eyes?” It’s almost always where it is supposed to be and if it’s not, it’s under something or very close to where it should be.
wonderful kiwi / 23653 posts
Haha I love it! Mine are younger, I find myself saying a lot of “use your words” for my 3 yr old and just a lot of “no” to my 1 year old haha!
wonderful pea / 17279 posts
These are great MOMisms. I love the discipline underlying them. At my parenting stage I am all “use your words” and “uh-oh is not on purpose” and having LO clean up intentional accidents himself.
clementine / 830 posts
ha! love these. “asked and answered” makes me laugh because this is an objection i use all the time when defending depositions.
blogger / eggplant / 11551 posts
These are great!! I am definitely going to start using these – the “asked and answered” is genius – the gazillion why’s can get tiresome!
clementine / 874 posts
I am so grateful DS hasn’t learned why yet, but now I’m prepared! Thanks for sharing!
blogger / nectarine / 2043 posts
Can you do a follow-up post on how to train kids to respect “Mom’s off the clock” thing, cuz for mine those words or anything even resembling “mom needs a minute” is the start of needing all the things immediately.
nectarine / 2460 posts
I love these! Short and to the point. I’m definitely going to try these out!!
persimmon / 1310 posts
I can’t wait until my kids are old enough that “mom’s off the clock” might work!
grapefruit / 4089 posts
These are great!
pomelo / 5621 posts
Mom’s off the clock, this is great! I’m going to use this.
grapefruit / 4455 posts
@Iced Tea: meeee too.
blogger / apricot / 431 posts
I’m definitely gonna start saying these phrases!
blogger / kiwi / 626 posts
My new favorite is “Lets Play Quiet Time” because LeLe never stops talking. Good lord, it is like her stream of consciousness all day every day. Love her, but just be quiet!
blogger / cherry / 174 posts
@Mrs. Carrot: We focus a lot on positive parenting, however, I’m also big on the idea of no empty threats. So if I tell the kids quiet/bedtime or no T.V in the morning, they know I’m not playing around and it usually works. My little guy is just now 3 so it’s just starting to work for him, but BeBe knows that if I say it, I mean it. But, I choose my battles carefully.
blogger / cherry / 174 posts
@nwm: That’s hilarious! I had no idea that was a legal term, but it works!
nectarine / 2821 posts
@TemperanceBrennan: exactly what I was thinking!