At Scribble’s six month appointment, he was sitting pretty at the 50th percentile in height and weight. I had become smug about nursing; we were on an easy schedule and my supply was as good as ever. I had given away all the unopened formula samples and was confident I’d make it to my goal to exclusively breastfeed until I introduce cow’s milk at 1 year. Seeing his stats just reinforced my smugness. Tra la la!
In month seven, things got complicated! I got my period for the first time since my pre-pregnancy days and my supply seemed to dip: I didn’t feel overfull anymore, my pre-pregnancy bras were starting to fit better, and Scribble seemed less interested in nursing. I tried occasionally to pump and could produce only drops. I had read that I couldn’t accurately gauge my supply using these indicators, so I carried on. We introduced solids the BLW way; since we started with finger foods, I was committing to trust my body to provide the bulk of his nourishment.
Scribble didn’t have a seven month appointment, so instead I weighed him at home, using the super-accurate method that I know all moms have tried before: weighing myself (ugh!), then picking him up, weighing us together, and subtracting my weight from ours combined. I knew this was a bad idea, so when the scale said he hadn’t gained a thing, I just assumed it was a sign that I needed to stop being so obsessive. Fast-forward to his eight month birthday, which was also appointment-free. I was consumed with fears about his growth and was “weighing” him all the time. The scale never budged. So I took him to the lactation consultant’s office for a free weigh-in. When I got there, the scale confirmed my suspicions: no gain. I booked an appointment with our family doctor for the very next day, fearing that they would advise me to dump BLW, push rice cereal, and supplement with formula.
The next day, Scribble weighed in. He hadn’t lost any weight, and he had grown a half an inch, but he hadn’t gained an ounce in two months. The NP I saw was concerned. The practice takes a contemporary approach to solids, so she didn’t mention anything about rice cereal or purees. But she did tell me to start supplementing with formula, ideally by pumping for every meal, then mixing in formula until I had a six ounce bottle to give him. There was no talk of increasing my supply.
I recoiled at the suggestion. At eight months, Scribble is still emotionally attached to nursing. From December to February he wouldn’t touch a bottle, and even then he would only take one occasionally, and only from someone other than me. I felt that pumping exclusively was a one-way-ticket to exclusive formula feeding: my supply would take a hit if I only pumped, and I would probably get sick of doing both at the same time. I told her that wasn’t an option for me, and she advised me to offer a two ounce bottle of formula after every nursing session. She told me that she expected him to gain at least a pound by his next appointment! I had my marching orders.
I felt so much guilt. I was convinced that sleep training and allowing Scribble to sleep through the night had caused my cycle to start and my supply to dwindle. The NP had thrown phrases around like “healthy brain development” and “necessary calories.” Had I actually harmed my baby by doing what I thought was right? Was I one of those crazy hippie parents who accidentally starves their child by keeping them on an aggressive diet regimen?
My experience with undersupply forced me to confront the extent to which breastfeeding had become a part of my identity. Somewhere along the way I had gone from having a casual, practical attitude toward breastfeeding to having an extreme attachment to it. I started to wonder what sort of mother I would be if I didn’t nurse. What would be the basis of our bond? I decided to be a stay-at-home mother so that I would be available for every crisis; why had I devoted myself wholly to being an at-home parent just so that I could shrink back from this challenge?
On the other hand, I was just starting to dig myself out of the hole of new parenthood. For example, the hubs and I had started planning a daytrip away for my birthday and I was saving up milk– one or two ounces at a time– for Scribble to drink while we were gone. We had weddings and graduations to attend. How could I possibly make enough milk to supplement him six times a day, while also saving up for these times when nursing would be impossible or inconvenient?
I took a nap and thought things through. When I woke up, the choice felt obvious: I would try my best to hold off on formula and take it ounce by ounce. I had held onto my 1 year EBF goal for eight months, and to throw it away for a few hours alone with the husband, or the convenience of not having to nurse at a wedding reception, felt silly. I had come through oversupply, and I just wasn’t ready to give in. I wanted to believe what I had heard so many times: that the vast majority of women who want to breastfeed can do so if they make it a priority.
So I called my lactation consultant, who calmed me down, balked at the recommendations of the NP, then suggested I offer Scribble higher fat solids and pump in the middle of the night to provide Scribble with a supplement feed. I gave myself a week to try this experiment: if he didn’t gain four ounces in one week (the necessary amount to get him to his 1 month 1 pound goal) I decided it would be reckless to continue. I set up a pumping station in my living room, borrowed an infant scale from a good friend, and bought a bottle rack. I took fenugreek, drank water like mad, and pumpedpumpedpumped.
I’ve been doing this for two weeks now, and he’s already gained a whole pound!
Supplementing has not been easy. At first Scribble resisted the bottle and I had to feed my milk to him in a medicine dropper. Over time he has become more comfortable. I am never able to get the ten ounces I need; I usually get between 5 and 8. But Scribble’s weight gain has been so fantastic that I’m not concerned. I just give him whatever I can make and chart his weight daily.
As for solids, I didn’t introduce any more. I knew that breastmilk contains more calories than most solid foods, and I feel more than ever that Scribble needs to get the majority of his calories from my milk, because more nursing would mean an increased supply for me. So we continue with BLW, and we only do two meals a day. But I do try to make those meals count by offering dense foods: meat, oatmeal, veggies roasted in olive oil, and tons of avocado.
Although I hate having to pump twice a day, it has been a beneficial experience for me. Now that Scribble has met his one pound goal and I’m producing more, I am working on a freezer stash. This weekend we had to travel to a wedding and I pumped while we drove to our destination. I nursed him as usual but saved his supplement bottle to give him during the ceremony as a distraction! I gave him a bottle when we were out running errands and he held it himself! For someone who nurses 99% of the time, this was a revelation. But tonight, when a freak boil water advisory was issued for my small town, I was thankful that I don’t require water to prepare formula. I truly have the best of both worlds.
Scribble has gained so much so quickly that I wonder if he was not poised for a growth spurt anyway. Maybe all this supplementing and feeding is really unnecessary. If that is the case, I am glad at least that I did not throw my goal of EBF away on something that was a simple case of bad growth spurt timing.
My experience with undersupply has stripped me of my nursing -mama pride and restored in me a genuine sympathy for all women who encounter difficulty breastfeeding. I can now say with confidence that nursing is one of the hardest things I’ve ever done! And I know that, had Scribble not gained any weight, I would have offered formula. In fact, I still may have to eventually if his weight gain slows again. And that’s ok!
But my experience has also taught me not to give up on a goal prematurely. It also strengthened my resolve to challenge the recommendations of health professionals if their advice is draconian and illogical! More than that, this experience solidified my belief that breastfeeding is possible for most mothers, although sometimes it requires flexibility. Having dealt with both under and oversupply, I want to tell other women facing these challenges that it is ok to fight for every ounce!
Have you dealt with undersupply?
blogger / eggplant / 11551 posts
This was a great read – you are a fantastic mama to power through even in the face of adversity! I struggled with oversupply for the first 2-months, and still have some oversupply though I think it’s starting to even out… so I completely relate to the overconfidence about having plenty of milk mentality. It’s good to be reminded that ANYTHING can happen, and to not take my milk supply for granted! I hope I can be as strong as you if I encounter undersupply issues and keep going…
blogger / pomegranate / 3201 posts
Awesome job, mama! Good for you for working through the difficulties.
pomegranate / 3414 posts
Very encouraging. I suffered under supply with DD and supplemented with formula but only in her daycare bottles; we nursed exclusively at home. I tried fenugreek and MMP with no real result. I initially stressed about it and felt like a failure but then came to terms with it and she nursed for 14 months.
DS is 8 months old and I haven’t experienced low supply yet but I’ve been taking fengreek/blessed thistle or MMPSB since I went back to work. I’ve rethought what is adequate in terms of how much I pump and while I love to have extra ounces I am just happy having enough for the next days bottles. I also know that not being able to EBF will not make me a failure as a mom.
pomegranate / 3225 posts
Great post! Like you, I thought I had it all figured out, until I got sick and a cold seriously diminished my supply. I have brought it up with more milk plus, but sheesh, stressful!
grapefruit / 4120 posts
Way to go!! I am so happy you were able to make this work
nectarine / 2964 posts
Kudos. My road was similar to you so it hurts me reading your story. I had an oversupply in the beginning, LO and I both loved nursing/breastfeeding and I don’t mind BFing anywhere. I was so confident we could make it to 1 year and beyond!
We had a great nursing relationship up until 3 months when we introduced the bottle (me returning to work). He then started having nursing strike issues in 4+ months. We also started battling weight gain issues. He dropped on the chart, from 95% to 25% (on weight), between 3-9 months. We saw specialists, nutritionists, lactation consultants, tried adding formula powder into my breast milk, adding oil into purees and feeding avocado. In general, he is just not a big fan of eating, regardless of bottle, nursing, or solids. I wrote a renowned doctor in breastfeeding and he suspected it was a drop in my supply and LO was no longer interested because milk doesn’t come flushing out. I was a wreck for that half year. I was at wits ends.
We ended breastfeeding at 8.5 months (LO dumped me) and pumping at 10 months when I realized there is no point to hang on anymore. However after 1 years old and after the cow’s milk, everything seems to be sorted out by itself and he eats like a cow now. He is still at 25% for weight and 50% for height, but I am not concerned anymore because at least he’s growing with the chart.
Best wishes to you and I hope you will figure this all out soon!
grapefruit / 4441 posts
Great post! I applaud your dedication. It is so hard (confusing and stressful!) to know what to do when struggling with supply. I think I would have freaked if LO hadn’t gained in 2 months… I’m glad you were able to approach things calmly and hang in there long enough to get your supply up!
I have really been struggling with supply since going back to work. I actually think my supply is fine, but I have a hard time pumping enough. I have zero milk in reserve, so if I ever drop a bottle, I may have to miss work or give her formula. I am trying really hard to build some reserve, but it’s tough… I’m pumping after she goes to bed and sometimes in the morning just to get enough for her bottles (in addition to 3x at work).
There was a 3 week period when my LO only gained 9 oz total and that worried me. While I was on maternity leave, she’d been gaining ~8oz per week. I didn’t want her to be going hungry at daycare… in the beginning the daycare workers said she seemed hungry, but I brushed it off because she was gaining 6-7oz a week… but when she was only gaining 3 per week, I started to worry. I started pumping even more and upped the amount I was sending her. She is now gaining 5-6 oz per week, which is in the normal range for 5 months.
I am fighting to get her to double her birth weight by 6 months… she was 16 lbs 5 oz today and needs to be 17 lbs 8 oz in 3 weeks. She might not quite make it, but hopefully she’ll be close.
She started out 95th percentile for weight and 99th for height… at 4 mo she was 54th percentile for weight and 99th for height. I am hoping to keep her weight around the 50th percentile, but we’ll see…
At 6 mo I plan to introduce solids… any recs on what to start with? I need to read the BLW stuff… I’m not very familiar with it.
pomelo / 5628 posts
I think the smartest thing that you did here is to stimulate your breasts more frequently. I think there are a lot of misconceptions about supply and pumping out there. It’s true that a baby is more efficient, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t empty your breasts by pumping….you just have to pump longer and “help” with compressions. I’m glad your supply increased and that you have a bit more flexibility!
grapefruit / 4669 posts
Yaaay for a problem solved! I don’t know what I would have done if a doc/NP gave me advice like that, but it sounds like following your gut and talking to a LC worked out well. I am 10 weeks in and BFing is definitely not easy! But I think I might be a little prideful about it since we haven’t had any real problems. I keep telling myself not to be; you never know what can happen down the road!
guest
It bothers me so much to see so many pediatricians get so caught up in the numbers- specifically the weight of your child. Is your child thriving? Do you as a mother feel like your child is eating enough? Then forget the scale! And forget those damn percentages! So many moms are told their babies need to gain a certain amount and it causes them so much anxiety- especially in the early months when we’re already so hormonal thinking everything we’re doing is wrong. I can tell my baby is doing well without needing a scale. Let’s just trust our guts more! I’m glad you stuck with it!
squash / 13764 posts
This really hits home, because we have struggled with a similar issue! LO dropped from the 40th to the 25th percentile from 2-4 months, and was 8th percentile at 6 months. months 4, 5, and 6 were consumed with my worrying about his weight, trying to get him to nurse more often, buying an infant scale, and starting solids earlier than expected to try to bump his weight gain. I’ve also started supplementing with a bottle of pumped milk (challenging because he also hates the bottle!).
however, based on what I’ve read, it’s actually VERY VERY normal for breastfed babies to slow way down on weight gain after 6 months. I’m a little surprised that everyone was so quick to say that you had an undersupply….if your LO seemed satisfied and was obviously still growing up in height, I would guess that he was just becoming more active and burning off more calories. At the same time, I totally understand the fear that LO is not getting enough to eat and is starving and unhappy. Here’s a great chart from kellymom that shows that weight gain for BF babies can be on the lower end and still be normal! http://kellymom.com/bf/normal/weight-gain/
blogger / nectarine / 2010 posts
Good job!! As you know, Little M too is a slow gainer. He dropped to around the 5th percentile between 6-9 months and has remained there. From 6-11ish months I only gave him one meal of solids a day (albeit a huge one that just kept getting bigger and bigger!) and upped the breastfeeding too to keep his weight up. You’re doing a great job!
coffee bean / 32 posts
This is EXACTLY what I have just gone through with my 9mo! Like you, I had an oversupply for much of his first several months. Around 8 months, he completely lost interest in nursing (he is just too busy for mama!) and started dropping feeds like crazy. He was always on the smaller side anyway so I really started to worry. We bought a baby scale to start measuring every feed and track his weight. I was glued to the pump and felt so distressed every time he rejected me. Occasionally I would pump what I could and offer it to him in a bottle, but I didn’t want to get him too hooked on bottles; I was already worried he was weaning early.
We never sleep trained but we were trying to limit his nighttime feedings until this happened. To compensate for his missed feeds during the day, I would nurse whenever he would take it, which was right before sleep and throughout the night. I refused to let him wean and pumped to keep my supply decent.
Yesterday was our 9-month checkup and I was shocked to see he had actually jumped up on his curve! As much work as it was, I think truly feeding on demand helped. I also think they just become very efficient nursers and he was taking on more milk than I realized despite his sparse feedings. Lastly, we are doing BLW too and I guess those solids really helped bulk him up!
I was so happy to read that you didn’t give in and supplement with formula. It’s been a tough journey but your story, and mine, and so many others, prove to me that (with some exceptions, of course) if you REALLY want to breastfeed, you will make it work.
persimmon / 1116 posts
I LOVE this post!! I am not a Momma yet, but I really want to BF one day and this encourages me so much!! I love reading stories where Momma’s stick to their intuition and do what they have to do when it comes to things like this, even if its hard for a while. You are a great mother, and congrats on powering through!!
blogger / pomegranate / 3300 posts
Great post. I had some supply issues at the beginning with my twins and did have to supplement. The scariest thing is to have the doctors tell you they aren’t gaining enough! Good job sticking to your intuition and getting his weight up.
guest
Thanks for this post. I am pumping at work as we speak! I am 3 months PP with major oversupply and what you describe is my nightmare scenario. I have a huge freezer stash (about 70oz, so I have some wiggle room if something like this were to happen but I hope it doesn’t. Similac sent us a huge box of samples and I gave them all away because I am very committed to breastfeeding to at least one year. My little one was in the 90th percentile for height and weight last we checked, we don’t plan to sleep train, and I BF on demand day or night if I am around…so I hope we can make it. I admire you for powering through!
GOLD / nectarine / 2884 posts
@Mrs. High Heels: Thank you! Oversupply was a total NIGHTMARE. I hope you start to even out soon! I did block feeding but now that I’ve gone through oversupply I kinda wish I had just pumped….!
@purrpletulips: I’m at the same place right now too! 8 months is so close to the finish line you know! Just taking it one day at a time is more than good enough!
@sloaneandpuffy: Thanks!
@78h2o: I think the only reason I was able to not stress about it is because I had become so defensive about BFing; I knew his weight wouldn’t gain as drastically after 6 months as it had before then. Where I live FF is still the norm and I had to develop a hard shell to handle the constant questions! As for BLW, I heartily recommend it. Scribble has spoon-fed himself since day one…I honestly can’t imagine what it would be like to try to teach a child that is used to being fed how to feed themselves…it sounds like such a struggle! I will say, Scrib was really interested in self-feeding from the get-go, which made it easier. We progressed from loaded spoon to mesh feeder to big pieces of food and now to small pieces. I still do purees in addition to whole foods, but I spread them on toast or mix them into chunky oatmeal that he can pick up or eat on a spoon. I love it! Makes my life so much easier; I can go to a restaurant and feed him what we’re having no problem.
@Mrs Green Grass: Thank you! I think pumping has been a real boon for me as well!
@Mrs. Stroller: He’s been on a little bit of a nursing strike the past 24 hrs. (learning to crawl), so today I only did solids at “brunch.” I think I’ll stick with that until his interest in nursing comes back! It is so annoying to feel pressured to provide 3 meals of solids a day when it really isn’t necessary. But everyone looks at you like you’re crazy if you don’t!
GOLD / nectarine / 2884 posts
@hilsy85: Isn’t it annoying how peds don’t even have the most up-to-date weight charts? Honestly people!!
@AccordingtoLara: You are so right about truly feeding on demand. When he was a newborn, my first thought was ALWAYS to nurse Scribble. As he got older and I got obsessed with providing him sleep, I usually defaulted to putting him down for a nap (we always nursed first though). This got us onto a schedule of eat/nap/play/repeat that was good, but it didn’t give me the flexibility to nurse whenever. I’m getting back to that point now! Scribble seems pretty attached to STTN though; we tried to ST him for 3 months and nothing ever stuck and then around 7 months he just started STTN and so far hasn’t looked back. Knock on wood! So instead I pump at night!
@citymouse: You’ll do great! I think the thing is, you have to make it a priority in your life. It is a goal for me, just like training for a marathon might be for someone else. So it takes priority over other luxuries or even other goals I have.
@camille: best of luck! I really think my period coming back did a lot of damage to my supply. Although when I O, my oversupply is back– strange!
@Emily: I totally agree!