Miss H is a big girl now and preparing to visit grandma and grandpa all on her own for 5 nights! This is huge! And, of course fills me with a weird mix of excitement, anxiety and sadness. For starters, while Mr. H has left her for multi-day work trips, I have never left her overnight. Ever. I put her to bed almost every night and wake her up every morning! Over the past 15 months I’ve either slept with a baby by my side or a monitor (blaring white noise) by my head.
All grown up and ready to travel on her own!
So, as the trip gets nearer, here is what we’re doing to prep for it:
One-on-One Grandparent Time
My parents came up to visit recently, primarily to give Miss H the chance to spend some more time with them before her visit. While they were here, Mr. H and I went out to lunch so that Miss H had some great time with her grandparents without mom and dad hanging around! It also gave them the opportunity to see how much she has grown and changed since their last visit (and how fast she’s gotten!). The visit was a great success and will hopefully make the transition a little bit easier.
Detailed Schedule & Food List
We’ve provided my parents with a very detailed daily schedule for Miss H, along with a full list of everything she likes to eat (which is a lot!). And, fortunately, there really isn’t anything she doesn’t like or has a bad reaction to. We’ve also included how we prep her food and provided some basic recipes for food that they can make in preparation for her visit. We also detailed out examples of breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks so they have a feel for how big her meals are.
Streamlined Where We Could
To make sure the visit is easier for everyone, we’ve found opportunities to streamline certain elements of Miss H’s life. We will have them use disposable diapers instead of cloth (no extra laundry for them!). Individual outfits will be packed in Ziploc bags and labeled so they can simply grab a bag for the day and don’t have to worry about what matches what. All other items will be packed strategically so that utensils/places/sippy cups are packed together in one bag and tooth brush/toothpaste/shampoo/etc will be in another bag. We’ve also been able to transition Miss H to one mid-day nap successfully (our goal by this trip) and transitioned her completely off of a bottle!
Strategic “Hand Off”
Because my parents live 3+ hours away, it’s easiest to find a mid-way point to meet them. Fortunately there is an IKEA along the way, so we will be meeting there. It works out incredibly well because on a weekday morning, it will not be busy and we can easily let Miss H run around the store while she warms up to my parents again. We can easily give her a snack there and change her diaper – IKEA is such a family friendly place. And we will be able to time it out so that when they leave with her, it will be right around her nap time so (fingers crossed!) she’ll nap the rest of the journey.
Keep Myself Busy
The day after Miss H goes to my parents’ house, Mr. H and I will be catching a flight. I’m already planning about 27 projects to do around the house before we leave! I won’t lie — I’m nervous about what it will be like to be in a baby-free house overnight – it will feel so empty! And strange to not be tip-toeing around. One of my biggest projects will be painting – many of the doors in our house need a fresh coat of paint. I plan to stay busy busy busy tackling a bunch of projects that I can’t easily do with Miss H in the house!
I know all of this prep work and planning may not make it easy on the day, but at the very least it helps me feel like I have some control over the situation. The trip Mr. H and I are taking is not one I necessarily needed to go on (it’s a work trip for him), but I put myself in this position because I knew that it would be important for all of us. There always had to be a first time Miss H went somewhere for a few days without us, and I knew there would be a first time where I would leave her for a few days. While it might have been nice to separate these two “firsts,” the opportunity didn’t arise so we’ll be doing both at the same time! But I’m excited for my parents to have some much time with her, and I’m secretly excited for all of the sleep and relaxation I’ll have during those few days! I’m daydreaming about all of the books I’ll be able to read.
I’m excited to share a “Part 2” after we’ve actually taken the trip – how both of our trips went, and how it felt to not have a baby in my arms for a few days (sniffle!).
If you’ve left your LO before, how did it go? Was it harder than you thought it would be?
persimmon / 1178 posts
I am stalking this because I am actually considering leaving my LO one night a week for my job. She will be happy and safe with her dad but I cannot imagine being separated for a whole day and night! I know it is time- she s 15 months and like you said, the first time apart has to happen at some point. Sniff.
I hope you have a really good time and that this ‘first time’ goes as well as possible!
blogger / grapefruit / 4836 posts
Thanks for sharing! We are leaving little lion with my parents for 3 days while we are at a destination wedding, and I am a little nervous too! We will be staying in the same area, but we are both in the wedding and will be so busy with preparations, he will have a lot more fun playing with grandma and grandpa
I hope it all goes well for miss h!
hostess / wonderful persimmon / 25556 posts
I hope you enjoy your trip and your alone time without Miss H. I think you are very brave!!
hostess / eggplant / 11068 posts
Ooooh! Can’t wait to hear how it goes! This post is encouraging!
pomegranate / 3768 posts
can’t wait to read part II!
pear / 1837 posts
We left LO overnight with my parents for one night when he was 12 months and for 3 nights when he was about 16 months… when he was about 18 months my parents moved to be close to us and he started spending the night there a couple times a month, and most recently spent a week and a half with my parents at age 27 months.
He has never had any issues, and it has always gone really well. He definitely gets some leeway on rules when he’s there- he hasn’t used a pacifier at home in well over a year, but he gets one when he’s away from home, and my mom will usually hang out in the room with him till he falls asleep rather than letting him fuss at all. They also let him watch some TV, which he almost never gets to do at home, and while he still generally eats pretty healthfully there, he gets more treats than he would with us. He seems to have a pretty good understanding of the fact that the rules are different at our house and at the grandparents’ house, so we haven’t found it difficult for him to transition back to our rules after a few days with the grandparents. It might help that he’s already used to the fact that daycare does things differently than we do at home.
GOLD / wonderful coconut / 33402 posts
We are already planning on leaving R for the first overnight in November at my parents, while we go celebrate our anniversary. They want to do it before, but I am not ready. Then two weekends later I am going away, 2 hours away, for the weekend with girlfriends. I don’t know that I am going to be ready to leave her all weekend.
grape / 99 posts
At 15mo LO went to stay with my parents for 11 days 12hrs away while we packed and moved. I was nervous but knew my parents would have no problem. It turned out great. We all came back refreshed (and in a new house). My parents are moving closer in 2mo and planning to take both kids 27mo and 3mo 1 weekend a month for the whole weekend if we want. When the littlest turns 1 next year, they want to take them for a week so we can go away for our 5yr anniversary.
GOLD / nectarine / 2884 posts
So excited for you!
We are hoping to take a weekend trip this fall. I can’t wait to read your update so I can see how all your preparations go!
blogger / pomelo / 5361 posts
Eek, I’m totally nervous about the first overnight stay, much less several nights. I’ve been telling myself it will probably be much harder on me than the boys or our parents! Hope it is a resounding success for all of you!
grapefruit / 4817 posts
We just took our first overnight last Friday (he’s 16 months), and it was really hard for me. I have a music festival coming up in September that I’m going 2 nights for, and I’m already stressing about it. I can’t imagine 5 days, at this point. Good luck!
bananas / 9973 posts
Excited to read Part II! DH is already talking about leaving the baby overnight (and wanted to for our anniversary a couple of weeks ago), but I am surprisingly NOT as ready as I thought I would be pre-baby. In fact, the more time I am a mother, the more scared and nervous I am at the thought of leaving her. Your posts are encouraging!
blogger / apricot / 366 posts
@lizzywiz: I know, it’s always hard having that time away! Even when they are with their other parent, it’s had not being the one there!
@Mrs. Lion: At least you’ll be plenty occupied with the wedding!
@Smurfette: Aww, good luck! I’m sure it will go well
But I agree, it is hard to even think about missing time with them!
@LaurenEC: 11 days – go you!! That’s a long stretch of time but it’s great to hear it went well. And I can imagine how much easier it was to pick and move!
@Mrs. Sketchbook: Do it!!
@BananaPancakes: Aww I’m sure your next trip will go well! It is hard to do though but good to have some downtime!
@shopaholic: It is weird to think about how much things change after you’re a mom – it’s not as easy to leave them as you’d think pre-baby
hostess / wonderful honeydew / 32460 posts
Exciting! Hope you have fun and hope she does well!