One of Lorelei’s very favorite activities these days is helping out in the kitchen. She’s like most toddlers: she has an eye for the real and has zero time for anything an actual cook wouldn’t do. And she knows all about what goes on in the kitchen. After all, she’s had a front-row seat for years. When she was smaller, she loved to be on my back in a wrap, watching me cook and investigating kitchen tools like whisks, smelling spices, and touching ingredients. I tried to talk my way through the process to help her feel at home. What were we doing now? Now I was going to peel some garlic. The papery skin coming cleanly away from a clove to reveal the smooth skin underneath. Chopping or smashing the cloves released a smell that promised a savory treat. Butter would be melting nearby in a pan, and the garlic would soon be added to sizzle and lend flavor whatever was coming next.

Now that she is swiftly coming up on her third birthday, Lorelei is more capable than that baby in the wrap. More capable of being a help, and also, oddly enough, more capable of getting in the way. Ellie and Lorelei have both never been particularly easy kids. It’s okay–we make them that way (apparently); and most of the time we’re rewarded with the ensuing hilarity, creativity, and energy that they have in spades. Ellie was never particularly interested in doing much in the kitchen, but she loved to watch. Lorelei is more of a human tornado. She still can’t really be trusted on her own for more than, well, however long we have before she would have something set on fire, taken apart, jumped off of, climbed, or destroyed. So, seconds? Maybe? Which means that putting her to work during cooking time benefits everyone. As I mentioned in my Capable Toddler post, when Lorelei has real work to do she really rises to the occasion. So my challenge every day is finding ways to include her in the process that are real enough to keep her hanging out rather than running off to pursue fresh mayhem.

Here are some tips and tricks to help you and your smallest sous chef–or chefs, should you be so lucky–make the most out of your time together in the kitchen.

Tall Containers for Mixing and Whisking

The first time I gave Lorelei a whisk and some ingredients I was combining for a marinade, I ended up with a large and expensive puddle all over the counter and a sad and frustrated toddler. Not quite what I had in mind. The biggest issue was that her hand-eye coordination and fine-motor skills were still developing. So she spilled. Often. Enter the measuring cup. We happened to have one that was tall, but also had a generous diameter. This way the ingredients wouldn’t slosh out if she gave a good, enthusiastic whisk, and were also easy for her to get at. Ours is a heavy glass. To make things safer, you can set the measuring cup on something non-skid, or you can use a plastic container. No need to buy anything new: I bet you have some sort of bowl or container with dimensions that would be perfect for this use. Just make sure that it’s over-sized for whatever ingredients are going in.

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Ramekins or Pinch Bowls with Pre-Measured Ingredients

Back to that pesky still-developing coordination: I’m a little fussy about my food. I like to follow recipes. My grandma who just throws whatever in a pan and calls it good drives me batty. Her food is delicious, but unlikely to taste the same twice. And forget about anyone else being able to duplicate one of her creations by pinning down some sort of a recipe (if you guessed that I was a goody-two-shoes rule follower in school, bonus points to you). Sometimes I let Lorelei measure things out herself using a measuring spoon, but quite often I will pre-measure spices or other ingredients into a small “pinch bowl” like this one, and then allow her to add them to the food however she wants. Sometimes she will sprinkle it in, other times she will dump. Sometimes she’ll ask for a measuring spoon so she can add it in one scoop at a time. Again, you don’t need a special tool here–feel free to use any container you have on hand. I like something that isn’t breakable so there’s even one less worry, but I think the odds are fairly high that your toddler is more careful than my own.

Break Eggs into a Bowl First

I give Mr. T full credit for this one. One of his personal specialties in the kitchen is a delicious egg sandwich. One morning I came downstairs to see Lorelei helping him make breakfast. On the counter was a bowl, and he broke an egg into it. Then Lorelei dumped the egg into the skillet. My small and well-rested mind was blown. She always wanted to help with eggs, and every single time I felt brave enough to let her try, she exploded them everywhere like some bizarre form of poultry-based Rorschach test. This allowed her to help in a way that she still found satisfying, but didn’t exponentially increase our household salmonella risk.

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Ballad of the Butter Knife

A butter knife and a banana or other easy to slice ingredient? Hours of fun. There is just something about a knife that screams out big and makes them an exciting new tool for a toddler or preschooler to investigate. There are ways to safely involve smaller children in this enticing aspect of food prep. I really like the ideas and tools from this post, but you can always just use or modify things you already have on hand. We use butter knives because I read this post when Lorelei with a wavy cutter would have been an ER visit waiting to happen, and then forgot about it until she was fairly knife-safe as long as an adult was around. More’s the pity for us, because I sort of want one now.

DIY

Sometimes, I just give Lorelei some of the tools and ingredients I’m using and let her do it herself. She loves to shape dough, so I will give her an appropriately sized hunk and let her make a roll or her own pizza. Sometimes I give a little help or guidance, but mostly she just has fun watching me and copying. These sorts of parallel tasks are pretty fun and companionable, and might just be one of my favorites in the kitchen. We spread mustard onto bread together, cut out cookies, sprinkle coarse sugar on muffins, and dollop out dumplings.

Come Clean

Take advantage of that natural desire to be more grown-up, and get some help with the cleanup. Lorelei is an old pro at helping load the dishwasher, and I give her things that belong in the bottom that aren’t too breakable. You know your child best, so take into account where she is in her development. If knives or breakable items are still a safety risk, save those for after your helper is finished. Anything plastic, spoons, spatulas, and the like are great for starting out. Pre-rinsing, which I am always more than happy to out-source, is a real favorite for most kids, too. Sometimes we even hand-wash a few things just for fun. It’s seriously amazing what can pass for fun when you are still young enough to not know any better.

Obviously this isn’t an exhaustive list: I may be special, but I’m not that special. So help me out, and share your best cooking tips. You can never have too many.