When I found out I was having a boy, I knew I was in trouble.
Boys are notorious for bumps, bruises, and frequent trips to the emergency room. They’re known for being rowdy, active, and a little bit reckless. I assumed it just came with the territory. I’m sure girl moms deal with quite a bit of this too, but I’ll be honest – I don’t remember a single trip to the emergency room as a kid for an accident or crazy decision I made, but my husband’s list is pretty long. Mentally, I’ve worked to prepare myself for crazy accidents in the future and unexpected trips to the ER, even though I know they’ll be awful in the moment and nothing can truly prepare me. But what I was really not prepared for? A trip to the emergency room due to sickness.
Hands down, it was the most terrifying night of my life so far.
Jackson got a double ear infection a few weeks ago. One of them was ruptured, he was miserable, and we were all in survival mode. He was spending a few days at home with various family members since Mr. Garland and I couldn’t take off work. But one afternoon when I got home and he woke up from his nap, I noticed that he was burning up. I took his temperature – 104.8. It was high, but it’s been that high before (after his 12-month shots) so I tried what we did last time, since our doctor had said not to take him in unless it stayed that high for about an hour. I gave him some Tylenol, stripped him down to his diaper, took my shirt off, and snuggled with him on the couch for some skin-to-skin time. I also tried to encourage water and/or milk, and even did a quick sponge bath (which is what helped break his fever the last time around). About 45 minutes later I took his temperature again…105.5.
In the moment, I was totally calm. I knew we had to take him in, so I had Mr. Garland call the after-hours line at our pediatrician to see if we needed to go to the ER or if an urgent care clinic would suffice. I tossed some pajamas on Jackson and got us all out the door with minimal panic. But on the inside? I was absolutely freaking out. The nurse line recommended the emergency room so a few minutes later we found ourselves checking in. I had no idea what to expect and it was all a bit overwhelming. Here’s a quick list of all of the tests/procedures that happened while we were there:
– They took his temperature, checked vitals, etc.
– They took a swab sample from each of his nostrils (he had a cold on top of everything else, so they got a good sample!).
– They did an x-ray of his chest.
– They took a vial of blood to do a culture.
– They gave him a dose of Motrin to knock the fever out (I had given him Tylenol before leaving the house, but it hadn’t been effective at all).
Prepping him for the blood sample – the swaddle idea was genius! Kept him nice and calm…and immobile!
At the time, they didn’t explain much about why they were doing what they were doing. I was curious, but it didn’t bother me not to know why they needed the various tests because it was clear they were trying to work quickly and efficiently to get him the care he needed. Once things had calmed down and I could tell the situation wasn’t as urgent anymore, I began to ask more questions about why they ran those particular tests. Here’s what I learned:
– The swab from his nose was to check for flu and RSV. He was negative for both.
– The x-ray was to check for pneumonia. Also negative.
– The blood sample was to send off to see if the current antibiotic he was on (for his ear infection) had possibly caused a secondary infection. They also checked there at the hospital for other potential issues with part of the blood sample (I can’t remember exactly what) but all of those tests came back negative.
In the end, the Motrin began to do its thing about 45 minutes after they gave it to him. They sent us home with strict instructions to keep him on Tylenol/Motrin every four hours and monitor his temperature. They said they would call if the blood culture revealed that his medicine was a problem (it wasn’t), and to keep him on it for now.
He continued to run a fever for a few more days, but it never got that high again. It was another week before he was back to normal, and it was our first major sickness as parents. It was horrible, terrifying, and utterly exhausting. I will say, though, that I learned a lot about myself and about how to handle these types of situations. Here are my top five tips for dealing with your first big illness or ER trip as a parent:
1. Don’t be afraid to ask questions. I’m a big believer in trusting that the doctors know what they’re doing (after all, I have no idea when it comes to medical care!) but if at any point you don’t feel right about something or don’t understand something, ask! I don’t ask many questions until the end of trips because I tend to let the doctors do their thing in the moment, but make sure all of your questions are answered before you leave – you’ll feel much better!
2. You may be surprised at how calm you are. It’s a good thing! I was shocked at how level-headed and calm I remained throughout the whole thing, even though I was petrified on the inside. I haven’t been in many emergency situations before, so I wasn’t sure how I’d manage it. It was almost as if all of my emotions and needs went on hold until I knew Jackson was okay. My mom offered to bring me up some food to the ER, but I told her there was no way I could eat. I didn’t even think about food until we were on our way home and I suddenly got hit with some very intense hunger pangs!
3. Embrace the snuggles! Now that Jackson has become a wiggly toddler, we don’t get cuddles very often anymore. Except when he’s sick. I don’t think he left my arms the entire night we went to the ER, and he was constantly snuggled up to me, keeping himself as close as possible. It’s hard to find the bright spots in awful nights like that, but I did what I could to enjoy the extra love I was getting, and I continued to cherish the extra cuddles I got throughout his illness. Being sick isn’t any fun, but cuddles sure are!
4. Keep the comfort items close. Maybe a no-brainer, but it was an absolute life saver for us to have Jackson’s lovey with us at the emergency room. He wouldn’t let it leave his sight, and I think it was a very major source of comfort for him while we were there. Throughout most of the time he was sick, he refused to put it back in his crib upon waking up, and it was constantly tucked under his chin or hanging off of his shoulder. Normally we don’t let him carry that or the pacifier around the house, but all the rules get broken when you’re sick! I’m so glad we remembered to grab his blanket as we were rushing out the door, and the visit would have been much more stressful without it.
5. Look for ways your partner can feel needed. Mr. Garland is very helpful in these types of situations, but it was hard on him while Jackson was sick and wanted nothing to do with anyone but me. I think it’s pretty standard for kids to become clingy to their moms when they aren’t feeling well, but that doesn’t make it any easier on the dads! I looked for little ways that Mr. Garland could help with Jackson or feel needed by him, even when Jackson was clinging to me. Things like having him give Jackson his sippy cup of milk or bringing him the pacifier made it more likely that Jackson would want to go to him, then he could sneak in a few snuggles. It’s not easy not to feel needed when your kid is sick, so I did anything I could to help the situation.
I’m so glad this whole ordeal is behind us and I hope we don’t have another trip to the emergency room for a very long time.
What was your child’s first big illness like? Anyone else take an ER trip lately?
blogger / clementine / 750 posts
So glad he was/is okay! Being in the ER as a parent when your child is the patient is terrifying. I intend on sharing our run-in with the hospital soon, but in the meantime, your second point rang true for me. I was absolutely shocked that I wasn’t freaked out. I mean, I was, but instead of balling like a baby I just stood there and took it all in, and even managed to ask a couple questions without completely losing it.
kiwi / 511 posts
Lately no, but I have had 2.75 visits for our not quite 3 year old and 1 visit for our not quite 4 year old. I have to say I agree I was relatively calm for most of the visits the first was the worst.
Our first was during a snow storm of epic proportions, my in-laws met us at the ER to take out oldest home with them and do the car seat transfer. By the time we left ER there was a statewide ban on driving which we didn’t know about until we left and were at home with a sick baby. It was comforting in one way to be home but yet not since we knew that if we needed to go back it was an ambulance trip. The ER doc was actually a pediatric specialist so it was reassuring on one level that he was perfectly fine sending us home but still a bit nerve wracking. Number 2 was an ER away from home in July complete with chest X-ray no pneumonia just then, but two days later we were driving through the night (roughly 2 hour shifts driving constant rotation for me and DH) with a baby that had a 104 degree fever. That was treated with alternating Tylenol and Motrin, plus a stop at a truck stop for a midnight nebulizer treatment. About 2 hours after we arrived home a friend came to watch our oldest (we had been gone for a week so no food in the house) and we went to the pedi, and at this point he had developed pneumonia. So the .50 time in the ER was a direct observation on the children’s ward because of a fever spike in the pedi’s office, we didn’t actually stay in the ER but were just ushered through it since our pedi called ahead. And the .25 time was when h slipped out of his cast post surgery so we were just going back to the ER because it was a Sunday for a new cast.
For the oldest it was an attack of the croup, we had already tried the standing outside in the cold, and a nebulizer but that didn’t seem to be working. He was so freaked out and was having trouble calming down. But by the time I had him in the car and 2/3rds of the way to the ER he was perfectly fine and I almost turned around to go home. We continued on and they gave him another nebulizer treatment so he had two probably within 2 hours of each other and then we were on our way home. I was pretty calm for this one.
blogger / pear / 1964 posts
Good tips! As a boy Mama I’m also expecting to be a frequent flyer — DH certainly had his fair share of visits growing up.
We were in the ER with Luigi at around the three week mark to check for pyloric stenosis, and it was a scary experience. I, too, noticed there wasn’t a lot of communication as to what they were doing. They’d run some test, and then leave, and we’d sit there for an hour not really knowing what came next. Happily, they sent us home with no problems identified, but it’s an experience I’m not anxious to repeat again.
blogger / nectarine / 2043 posts
Thankfully we haven’t had to experience this due to illness yet, but our first ER visit was when Baby C fell back/head first after trying to reach a high shelf a few months ago . Thankfully nothing was wrong, but she was throwing up continuously after the fall so we decided to play it safe. We definitely have a daredevil on our hands, so I have a feeling this won’t be the last visit. It’s definitely amazing how calm you find yourself in a moment of crisis, though. That laser focus on just making sure your kid is OK is all that you think about.
pomegranate / 3032 posts
We had to take my LO in when she was 4 months old. She had been sick with a stomach bug and had thrown up 3 times in like 18 hours and wasn’t nursing or taking pedialite. I had been checking in with her ped’s nurses line all day and when I called around 4pm, to report she hadn’t had a wet diaper in about 5 hours the told me to head straight into the ER for fluids, they called ahead and were waiting for us (and i literally live up the street from our hospital). I was in such a frenzy leaving our house that i forgot the pacifer and a blanket. The hardest part was being by myself (hubs was on his way from work) and then watching them IV her. Once they got her iv’d and she got some fluids you could really see her perk up and her color returned. The Dr. definitely made the right call in sending me in.
pomegranate / 3565 posts
No ER visits yet, but with two boys I’m expecting it will happen at some point. When DS1 was 2 months old, he was admitted to the hospital because of RSV. You are right about the being calm thing. I thought I would have been a mess, but I wasn’t. Maybe as moms, nature gives us the strength to stay calm for our babies so they aren’t scared.
cherry / 108 posts
No ER. But a few sick days with high fever. The first time was very sad to watch her not be herself because she was feeling so crappy. I’m glad your boy is okay. And I’m impressed by your calm demeanor through it all! I’m a big believer in the Magic of Motrin. I always use Motrin! I used Tylenol only once so far for my daughter when her fever wouldn’t break. It’s also amazing for those wonderful period cramps each month
blogger / nectarine / 2600 posts
Oh no glad he is ok. Drake had an ER visit right before he was one when we got hit from the side (his side of the car) He was ok as I was sure he was because the hit didnt touch him but still it was scary and upsetting. Its not a fun experience for sure
pomegranate / 3053 posts
So glad he is okay after such a high fever. How scary! Ours was when our then 3-year-old was playing around while walking down our stairs and slipped and went tumbling 3/4 of a floor down and slammed his forehead on the hardwood floor. I’m glad it wasn’t anything harder! He cried immediately (good sign, usually) and then came to me for snuggles and examination and then a few minutes later started yawning (uh oh!). I immediately called the nurses line (it was during the daytime) and they first said take him there and then changed their minds once I mentioned about the yawning b/c it might be a concussion. As soon as we got there he wanted to sit in the stroller so we did that and then 5 minutes after we checked into the ER he was playing with the wall toys in the kids waiting area. He did have a mild concussion and then a black eye that formed within 2 hours of the incident and it lasted FOREVER. I’d say 3-4 months! Even if he hit his forehead the trauma caused a huge bruise around his entire eye. He looked like someone punched him really hard on his eye. Another time was when he slammed his knee onto marbled floor and was limping for a couple of days. This time it wasn’t a visit to the ER but I was tempted at the time b/c he would not stop limping and was complaining it hurt. I’m sure this isn’t the end of it and he has a younger brother whose gotten a black eye from falling onto a bookshelf (by accident). Eeek…
blogger / pear / 1563 posts
So glad he’s ok! That must have been scary!
We went to Urgent Care when Little P was 9 months old because he threw up in his sleep, and since he was sleeping on his back it was very scary! ER trips are no fun!
pear / 1622 posts
We haven’t been to the ER yet. Thanks for the helpful post! I am happy Jackson is feeling better!
blogger / pomegranate / 3044 posts
Poor bubba! Glad he’s ok.
blogger / wonderful cherry / 21616 posts
Poor baby!! So scary with a temp that high. I hope he doesn’t get ear infections frequently – they’re rough!
We had to bring our son to the ER once for croup when he was having wheezy breathing – he turned out to be just fine!
blogger / apricot / 367 posts
Oh no hope he is feeling better and never has to go back to the ER! My daughter who is 3 just went to the ER for dehydration a couple weeks ago and I hope we never have to go back too!
blogger / apricot / 378 posts
@Mrs.Maven: Oh my goodness, how stressful to deal with ER trips during a snowstorm!
wonderful pomelo / 30692 posts
So glad he’s okay!! I totally agree with how calm you can be on the outside when you are FREAKING OUT on the inside. Xander has, unfortunately, been to the ER too many times to count because of his milk allergy and asthma. And his last trip to the ER ended up in a 3 night stay in the hospital! I couldn’t believe how calm I was during that. I guess because we had been to the ER so many times, I just felt completely confident that the doctors were going to take good care of him and he was going to be fine.
blogger / apricot / 310 posts
So grateful he is ok!
Also, this post totally prompted me to go and buy the A&A loveys I was on the fence about – I figure Will may eventually need a true comfort object and he hasn’t taken to his Jellycat (Rhino!) but loves to rub his little hand on his sleep sack. A blanket might work! So thanks for that tangible idea from this scary experience. Sending love to your little guy!
blogger / cherry / 247 posts
how scary! sooooo good for you to feel empowered to ask questions and get answers that made sense to you. i love that. glad he’s okay now, even if you never understood what root cause was
GOLD / wonderful pea / 17697 posts
Twice we’ve had to take E in to the ER for what was double ear infections that spiked scary high fevers…the first time it hit 105.9, and in the aftermath I was amazed at how calm I was about it once I had made the decision to bring him in. I cried later, once he was home and asleep