When my husband and I thought about moving back to the west coast from New York, we said our dream location was this area called “West LA.” It’s walk friendly, has beautiful streets with beautiful homes (that we’ll never be able to afford but can appreciate as we walk by), and it’s near the beach. I love the hustle and bustle of the city! Even being able to hear other people’s pots and pans clanking during dinner time makes me feel like I’m part of a community.
I grew up in the suburbs and was pretty confident that I never wanted the suburban experience for my children. Of course, I may change my mind entirely after a while! After all, LO is merely 16 months old. Living in the city is tough – but that’s exactly why I love it. I remember how my jaw would drop as I would see very young kids taking public transportation with their friends with no adult supervision. How did anyone teach them how to do things? Was this just normal for them? When I look at those young kids, I have flashbacks of when I was too timid to order a pizza in the 9th grade. (True story.) Los Angeles gets a bad rap because of the terrible traffic and… honestly, I think that’s it! It is often stated that if you could get anywhere where you wanted in a timely manner, Los Angeles might be the most perfect city in the world. I agree!
If you can get past the bad traffic, here are some reasons why raising your kids in Los Angeles could be a great thing:
Street Smarts
I would love Baby Pencil to have the skills to “figure things out” when things don’t pan out exactly the way you want it to. This happens almost everyday! I want him to be able to think quickly on his feet and problem solve. This could mean anything from understanding which direction is east and west, to controlling your anger when someone cuts you off, to knowing how to deal with an unstable homeless person. How do you know when it’s getting too dangerous and when do you know to step in? How do you know if you’re being scammed by a con artist? I want to raise him to be tough and capable. I say this because I was the complete opposite! I was so naive to the point where if someone approached me or asked me a question I didn’t understand, I would want to cry or barf. I was extremely sheltered and had no idea how to deal with some “normal” everyday situations. Given, I was the youngest in my family and was often treated like “the baby.” I’m not sure if this is just a personality issue, but I know that most of my suburban friends grew up very similarly until they went to college or decided to live in a large city.
Weather
California has some of the best weather in the US with sunshine most of the year. Sure you can live in different parts of Southern California that get extremely hot, dry weather when everyone wants to trek to the beach (or we call it “the westside”). My parents travel all the way to me from 45 miles east just because it feels 10-15 degrees cooler! The closer you get to the ocean, the cooler and breezier it gets. When you walk around the 3rd Street Promenade in Santa Monica, you can smell the salty water in the air!
Walking along the pier on a cool, breezy Saturday afternoon in Santa Monica.
Activities for the family
There are so many things to do around us that people from other countries come to do! The Getty Museum and Rodeo Drive are both just minutes away. LACMA, The Grove and the Tar Pits are a hop, skip and a jump away. And of course, Malibu, Venice and Santa Monica beaches have endless miles of things to do. All these places are great for children and families. My family and I recently spent an entire day just lounging and picnicking at the Getty. There’s tons of concerts, street events, random parades and great hiking trails along some of the most famous mountains, like the Runyon Canyon or Mulholland Drive trails. (You can often spot celebrities here… just an extra perk!)
No entrance fee at the Getty, just parking fees. There is a family room for fun activities for the kids!
These daddies are carrying babies in those huge backpacks! They even have a shade hood for blocking out the sun.
The end of the Rodeo Drive strip in Beverly Hills.
Everyday things to do
There are so many things to do, just outside my door. Very much like NYC, LA can be pretty walk friendly. You just have to know where (and when) to go. Because I see the local cobbler store or the pet store so often, I usually walk in because it’s just right there. I just DO more, because it’s so easy to get there. I’m definitely an “up and at ’em” type of person and I love being out of the house. Baby Pencil sees me interacting and greeting the same people. The 7-11 staff know him so well that they come out behind the counter and play with him! They have seen me through all the stages, from pregnancy until now. I go inside local stores about 2-3 times a week just to grab a drink or something. It’s not uncommon to accidentally run into a street parade, festival or a block party that has been an annual tradition for years.
Here’s a random parade that I ran into just walking by. I think it is from a Japanese or religious tradition, but all the people who decided to learn this dance were from all different ethnic backgrounds and ages.
We stumbled upon a FREE huge community picnic at a beautiful park! Free hot dogs, burgers, cookies and activities for the kids.
Ambition
If you live in a large city, chances are that thousands of the most ambitious and courageous people from all over the world have challenged themselves to make it big in your city. And you’re living with them! Lots of people in my community came from random parts of the world with very little in their pocket. They are so wide-eyed, talented and bustling with ambition. I was introducing myself to one girl I’ve never met before and after I asked what she’s doing in Los Angeles, she said, “I want to become rich and famous!” We both laughed because it was so honest, but that really was her reason for moving here. I would love Baby Pencil to grow up around that kind of atmosphere and have him grow up thinking that dreaming big and aiming high is normal!
Diversity
Just like Bee mentioned her post, I love how diverse the people are in the city in ethnic backgrounds, religion and age. People typically speak more than 1 language fluently. If you live in California, you most likely speak a little bit of Spanish! I always chuckle at the memories of getting my hair done at a Korean salon and the Hispanic hair washer speaking to me in perfect FLUENT Korean, but I had no idea what she was saying because I do not speak Korean. I was trying to speak to her in Spanish, but I realized later we both could have spoken English! It was a very confusing moment for us both. People are also pretty open in discussing their sexuality, religious ideas and political stance. It is very interesting to hear and observe people around me who believe in something else – it can get controversial, but most of the time, it is just really educational!
Besides cultural and belief diversity, there is also the personality diversity. There are people in my life that are straight up just awkward acquaintances. Call it social awkwardness or just not being raised in the same standards, it’s definitely not very free flowing and comfortable conversations when we talk to each other. But that’s ok! We don’t have to get along on every level to be friends. Because of convenience and some source of common ground, I find myself friends with people who are extremely different from me. It really helps you understand how to be open minded, ask questions, be courteous, not judge others and just plain and simple become more accepting of other people. I would love for Baby Pencil to also experience this while growing up and not only befriend people who are exactly like him. It’s totally okay to have a variety of people in your life!
Recognizing the world for what it is
We live in an area where there are homeless people. We have our Starbucks homeless man, whom we also see at our local mall. Then we have our 7-11 homeless man. Baby Pencil is very aware of them and sometimes they say hello to him. Even from an early age, I want him to be exposed to such things. The world is not a perfect place. There is always stinky garbage piling up, daily inconveniences, and rude behavior all around us. We accept these things but we also have to be careful as we walk around certain areas. It’s just as normal as any part of our day. In the future, I would love to take him to trips around the world to help serve truly poor people. I hope that this contrast will help him appreciate that he has a home, food and a bed to sleep in at night. But most of all, I want him to see brokenness because it really does something in your heart that cannot be taught. Life lessons and character development!
I’m not going to lie, it’s pretty tough to live in Los Angeles. I’ve been in so many hit and runs, seen physical fights, been infuriated by rude people, been “had” by scams, and been asked to join cults. Sometimes I feel like I’m walking in a land mine of weirdos and psychos. But there are many times when I’m in conversation with total strangers who are so different from me, and I love how organic those types of situations are. I have a heart for people, all people. I think meeting and seeing all kinds of people and children is what I would love to grow up in. I want Baby Pencil to experience these wonderful moments and also the hard moments. I want him to not only be physically healthy, but also mentally strong. It can be tough surviving these big cities, but I have high hopes that the pros outweigh the cons. And Los Angeles just seems like home to me!
guest
I relate to a lot of what you wrote in this post, as a fellow suburban-raised kid who fully intends to raise my 12 month old in a city. And that includes seeing/interacting with homelessness. However, I have to say it really feels wrong to me to post a homeless man’s picture on a website without his knowledge or consent. I also think it’s bad taste to call him “our starbucks homeless man…our 7-11 homeless man.” Please consider your words and actions more thoughtfully next time. Based on this post, it seems you’re treating the homeless as novelties, not real people.
persimmon / 1230 posts
@mrs.pencil – Thank you for this blog post; I loved reading it! We are consciously raising our son in a city, too (Baltimore), and although it can be hard at time, I believe it’s totally worth it. I really appreciated how you mentioned that you try to normalize homeless people for your son and encourage him to greet them. What a great lesson! And frankly I’d never given much thought to L.A. before reading this (probably I’m biased since I used to live in San Francisco), thanks for educating me about what the city has to offer!
pineapple / 12053 posts
I loved living in the west side through college and for several years after. I had a love/hate relationship with it toward the end, but now that I’ve been out of there for a while, driving down streets in Brentwood and San Mo still reminds me of home. I loved how walkable everything was, even when you really have to drive a lot of places too! But such easy access to all sorts of cultural icons, food, people, etc. are things I miss living in the burbs and I’m hoping to find a better balance for our long term living plans!
guest
I loved this post! Thanks for sharing. Did you ever consider raising your baby in NYC? Did having family in SoCal clinch it for you?
guest
We live in the SGV and when house hunting, we decided to stay in the SGV because of the schools. Out of curiousity, what do you plan to do when Baby Pencil goes to school?
blogger / eggplant / 11551 posts
Love the shot of D and the floral diaper bag
Great reasons for living in L.A.! But umm… can you venture just a wee bit down south… mmkaythxbye!
blogger / apricot / 335 posts
@Katrocap: Yes, I first heard about normalizing certain things about city living through older couples of mine who had grown up kids… but things definitely changed once I had a baby! I have to convince myself every now and then that it’s worth it, haha.
@birdofafeather: I totally agree that this area will always feel like home now! And I’m hoping to find the perfect little area where it can feel like burbs but I live right in the heart of the city. (I think you know there are random pockets like that!)
@jen: We did consider that! It was kind of scary since we had zero family in the east coast, but then living in the west coast I realized I never really saw my family anyway, haha. I do get jealous when I see photos of daily NYC living with babies because it looks sooo amazing!
@noelle: There are awesome awesome schools right by us! There’s a 10 out of 10 rating schools right by my current place. I love how diverse the nationalities are in each of the elementary schools too!
@Mrs. High Heels: HAHA I know you are dying for me to come closer! It’s hard though, you sell the burbs pretty well too!
coconut / 8279 posts
oohh I love LA! If I could get my husband on board we’d be there in a hot second.
We’re in Boston and love the city for all of the reasons you mention – diversity, problem solving skills, things to do, even weather here!
I grew up in the ‘burbs as well and always felt trapped in the middle of nowhere. The way our son loves the city makes my heart sing
grapefruit / 4671 posts
I love this post! For all the reasons you mentioned I am loving raising an NYC kiddo.
coffee bean / 32 posts
Wow this post really resounds with me as well! For all the reasons you mentioned and more, I’ve chosen to raise my boys in a city as well (first NYC and now Chicago).
We’re headed to LA as a family for the first time in October and can’t wait to check out LA! The Getty looks amazing! Thanks so much for sharing!
grapefruit / 4731 posts
NorCal Person here… I love LA except for the traffic!!
The one big draw to SoCal for me… is always get the impression that it has WAY better food than NorCal.
Great post!
blogger / apricot / 335 posts
@rachiecakes: Aww if you ever come out here, let me know! We can definitely explore the city together!

@plantains: I’m so jealous! I would love to raise my kids in NYC! I am hoping Baby Pencil goes to Columbia
@Eugy: Hope you guys have fun! The tram ride up to the Getty is also really fun for them!
@Raindrop: Once you get a good idea of which streets you can go to (and at what time) you can avoid the traffic! I plan my activities around the traffic – like I go to the nearest stuff to walk on foot at the end of the day when it’s the craziest. Generally I don’t leave my 1-2 mile radius after 3pm! Because things are so close, I don’t feel trapped or ever find myself caught in traffic EVER. It can happen!
guest
I get what you’re saying (and agree with) a lot of what you wrote in this post, but talking about “our” homeless people is downright offensive. They aren’t novelties to be gawked at, nor should their pictures be posted online without their knowledge/consent.
blogger / apricot / 335 posts
@B: I totally agree with what you’re saying, and this is exactly what I mean. This man is not to be gawked at, but a member of our community and we have a relationship with him. I think as someone who considers herself an artist it is Ok to have pictures that portray someone in a perspective where are describing their own personal life, just as I would for anyone. (I did consider asking him if I can take a picture, as well as the Starbucks guy, but he was talking to himself in a loud fit and didn’t get a chance). I value and respect every person in my community and am thinking about what to say when baby Pencil asks why a man is sleeping on the grass. By the way, this man is not necessarily homeless, I am not using this picture to portray homelessness but to display a contrast of different people all sitting at a Starbucks together as a community.
guest
I agree with B, I cringed when I saw the picture from Starbucks. I don’t really buy the explanation that he isn’t necessarily homeless because you posted his picture right when talking about the homeless people. I understand the point you were trying to make, I just don’t agree with stopping to take a picture.
apricot / 373 posts
I totally agree with B and E. I get what you are saying: living in a large city like Los Angeles exposes us to a wide range of people from different racial, cultural, socioeconomic, etc backgrounds and statuses. That exposure helps us start to address big questions about complex issues like racism, homelessness, poverty, etc. However, I think that it is really weird to start to talk about the people you see as “our Starbucks homeless man,” in the same way that you might mention “our local Starbucks” or “our 7-11.” I feel deeply silly having to say this — since it is so obvious — but people are not objects. (And what does that mean for you to say that someone is “your homeless man?” Perhaps you mean that he is part of your community?)
As to the photograph of the man at the Starbucks: if you didn’t stop to get his consent for the photograph because he (and I’m assuming you are referring to the man in the chair, not the barista!) was “talking to himself in a loud fit,” I think it’s safe to assume that he was not in the position to give consent (and perhaps it was not appropriate to publish his photograph). Again, it seems to speak back to the idea that this man is being treated like an object: he is the only person photographed in this post who has his face shown (or who is not far enough away to have the features obscured).
Anyway, I imagine that none of this was your intention — but, again, living in such a diverse city starts to make you more and more aware of things like this! I am also living in Los Angeles, on the westside, and I am really happy to be raising my son in this area.
(The traffic, of course, sucks.)
blogger / apricot / 335 posts
@mole: I do see what you’re saying too and I wish I could talk in person so you could see how I actually view the homeless situation in our city. I hope we can just agree that we disagree on how to exactly word and phrase the whole concept that I actually do have a heart for homeless people. I know that in my heart that to be true regardless how people think I am presenting it. But since this topic is about living in the city (and not whether we think it is ok to take public pictures of people) I hope we can close this topic on peaceful terms. It would be like opening a can of worms of a controversial topic which I did not mean to open! Nobody really knows who we all are and we all have different ways to expressing the exact same thing. (We all have a heart for people in general, right?) but I appreciate your guys’ point of view and I have had many conversations about this in person (text and online is the worst communication!) so if anyone wants to discuss in person I am more than willing!
grapefruit / 4455 posts
Interesting perspective. I like to go into the city and experience that but in the end I think I like the “quiet” of the suburbs..which are nothing like even small towns in other places!
grape / 87 posts
I’m raising my 6 month old in NYC and I agree with so much of what you’ve written. There are just so many opportunities here that you cannot find in the suburbs.
I think one of the things missing from city life is that community, close family, and friends support that is easier to find in the suburbs. Several neighborhoods in NYC are trying to rectify that by artificially creating such networks. People leaving the city because it’s easier to raise a child in the suburbs often cite this lack of “family” help and support. These artificial networks may circumvent this issue.
blogger / apricot / 335 posts
@2littlepumpkins: Honestly… I get really really tempted every single time I visit the suburbs! After reading the country post, I wanted to pack my bags and live in the country too, haha. The suburbs are sooo much easier and seems safer. I think there are just so many different pros and cons, it’s really hard to say which is “better.” But obviously where your job is plays a huge role, and for us that’s in the city… for now!
@Megatherium: I totally agree! I’ve been trying extremely hard to find a “real” community within walking distance but it has been pretty difficult. You just need to find ONE other mommy who’s in the same position as you – wanting that everyday-just-dropping-by type of friendship – and then it gets easier from there. I’m surprised at HOW many other moms feel the same way! Most families that are still in the city are here because (as I mentioned above) it’s because of someone’s job. I don’t want a long commute for my husband because that’s more time spent away from the baby. But yes… as long as you have 1 city mama friend, it makes it a looot easier!
pomegranate / 3225 posts
word. Thanks for all the tips of fun things to do in LA! We recently moved from the east coast to San Diego and I feel like it’s another world! Can’t think of a more family friendly area then So Cal!
blogger / cherry / 204 posts
I love LA, we would love to raise our kids there, we talk about it all the time, I’m just dying to get back in the west coast! Loved this post!
blogger / apricot / 335 posts
@kml636: Wow east coast to San Diego must feel SOO different! I heard SD was a great place to raise a family!
@Mrs. Pom Pom: Come back! But I know it’s so hard to do the cross country move… but if you do, give me a holler!