“Busy is a choice. Stress is a choice. Joy is a choice. You get to choose. Choose well.” – Ann Voskamp
I’ve noticed lately that almost every single time someone asks me how I’m doing, my answer is a dramatic sigh and one word: “busy.”
Mr. Garland and I both work full time, we attend church regularly, we both have extracurricular duties at work, and we have a toddler. I blog and exercise regularly, and I participate in an online continuing education program that lasts until next spring. Mr. Garland has several hobbies that keep him busy in the evening as well.
Our days are full. There’s a lot happening.
But lately, I’ve felt like I’ve been letting the “busy” consume my day and I’m not finding the moments of peace. I go through entire days where I end up in bed at the end of the night and can’t think of a single calm moment I had that day. It’s a horrible feeling, and I’m done with it.
A perfect quiet moment
I recently spent some time chatting with a janitor at the high school where I work. She shared with me that due to some staffing issues, she has been working from 7:30 in the morning to 11:30 at night each day. In addition to this, I later found out that she cleans 4 different houses on the weekends. She has two daughters, one of them still in high school. She was tired, she was frustrated, and she was stressed. But she still paused to take a moment to say that she was so blessed to have a job and that she truly does love what she does. When I ask her how she’s doing each morning when I arrive at work, she always has a smile and kind words about how great she’s doing. Always.
And I think I’m busy?
I’ve become fed up lately with the culture of busyness and the way that we as a society spend so much time stressed and running around and not enjoying the little things, so I’ve been making a concerted effort to find moments of calm in my day. I’ve started making my bed every morning – because it takes two minutes and it makes me smile. I’ve started letting go of having a clean house every night and spending more time relaxing with my family. I’ve let go of projects that were stressing me out – if they don’t have to get done, they can wait. I’ve said no to things that I would normally say yes to out of obligation. I’ve started to jot down the best quiet moments of my days so I remember how wonderful they are.
Every day should be filled with moments like these.
I’m purposefully and intentionally working on finding calm in my life and slowing things down. When I am less busy, I am happier, and when I’m happier I am a better mother, partner, and person. So starting now, I’m done choosing busy. I choose joy. I choose calm. I choose happiness.
How do you work to find calm, peaceful moments in your days?
grapefruit / 4712 posts
Love the picture of you reading to your LO. Where did you get that book? My DH would love that!
pomegranate / 3595 posts
Thanks–I really needed this today!
pomelo / 5628 posts
Being a high school teacher in October really is busy! I find bedtime to actually be one of my favorites. We have a set routine so we always read, sing and snuggle. 90% of the time, I’m happier afterwards.
blogger / nectarine / 2043 posts
I think it’s OK to be busy – life is busy. It’s when we start wearing it as a badge of honor that I think we’re going overboard. I don’t know how to not be busy, honestly – idle time, when it does happen, freaks me out a little bit. But I’ve been trying to be mindful of busy-ness that’s necessary and busy-ness for the sake of busy-ness. A clean house can wait. A work email can be answered another time. When my kid comes over and wants to play, we play and everything else is irrelevant.
coconut / 8279 posts
I’m happiest when I’m busy – so I guess I find the joy in the chaos and fortunately my son goes right along with me.
grapefruit / 4731 posts
*claps* I liked this.
I only plan at most one thing a weekend so we have one day of resting or a day to just do what we need to do (clean sometimes) without excuses. It is not appealing to me to be busy all the time.
That being said. There are a lot of people that like to be busy and find joy in that.
apricot / 409 posts
Thank you for this post. Thats been me lately (cue dramatic sigh and busy). This was a good reminder for me that what I do and how I feel about it is a choice. And I give alot of props to your janitor for having a positive attitude despite the very long hours and stress.
grapefruit / 4717 posts
Thanks so much for the reminder!
blogger / apricot / 378 posts
@MrsRcCar: Thanks! You can get the book on Amazon! It’s a favorite around here. http://www.amazon.com/Goodnight-Aggieland-Mark-Cimbrey-Brannan/dp/1450706258
apple seed / 4 posts
I have a print of this quote hanging on my kitchen wall: “Stop the glorification of busy”
It helps me to remember to slow down, but to also not take pride in being busy. Constantly being busy doesn’t make me better than anyone else. The opposite of busy is not lazy. It simply means I do not fill my life with the unnecessary.
grapefruit / 4923 posts
thanks for this. i run around after getting home from work to take care of tasks so that i have less to do after the kids go to bed, but i want to slow down and try to enjoy the short time i have with LO #2 before he goes to bed each night. gotta work on being okay with saving the chores for later.