Hellobee

Mr. Dolphin and I are passionate about traveling; Mr. Dolphin even got a tattoo when he graduated high school that translates to “wanderlust.” The travel bug really hit me when we spent our entire second year of law school abroad in London and traveled extensively throughout Europe and Morocco. Since returning stateside, we have continued to travel abroad quite a bit and have been to about twenty-five countries together, plus an additional dozen or so countries that I travelled to myself for work. Ideally, we’re hoping that we might find a way to move abroad again, but we want to be sure we are done having babies first (after two high risk pregnancies, I’d prefer to be with a team of doctors that I’m already comfortable with if we do decide to try for a third).

One of my all time favorite trips with Mr. Dolphin: Iceland 2012.

One of my biggest fears about having children, was that we wouldn’t be able to travel anymore. After having Lion I had a small meltdown, worrying that we didn’t have the budget to travel. Even putting the budget aside, Mr. Dolphin had concerns about bringing a baby on long plane rides and going through multiple time zones. We were determined to make it work, though, because traveling and experiencing new cultures is so important to us.

We started small by taking Lion on a trip when he was three-and-a-half months old to Chicago/South Bend when we went to a football game at our alma mater. Since that first trip, Lion has become a seasoned traveler, crossing multiple time zones so we could visit family on the West Coast and accompanying us to Europe. He’s been to several different states and five countries outside the US.

The sheer size of everything at the Diocletian Palace in Croatia impressed Lion.

Sometimes, our families have questioned our decision to take Lion (and soon, Panda) on these adventures when “they won’t even remember the trip.” I loved Mrs. Bee’s post on things her kids have learned while traveling abroad and wanted to share a dozen reasons we like traveling with young children even if they won’t remember:

For Us

Many of the reasons we travel with Lion and Panda even if they won’t remember is because of the benefits to Mr. Dolphin and me as parents, as a couple, and as individuals passionate about experiencing new things.

Babymoon to Israel and Jordan at 24+ weeks pregnant with Lion! 

1) We will remember: It’s true that Lion and Panda will have no memory of the trips we take them on now. However, Mr. Dolphin and I will remember! My mom has fond memories of the Disneyland trip we took when I was three where I apparently wanted to ride Dumbo all day; I have no recollection of this, but she does. I know that I will fondly remember Lion pointing out the window of the waterbus in Venice, impressed by the sheer fact that we were on a boat; of his first taste of taramasalata in Greece, which he loved; and of him following cats around in Montenegro, pointing excitedly each time he saw a new one, exclaiming “Cat! Cat!”

Running around outside the walls of the Diocletian Palace in Split, Croatia.

2) We get to see the world through the eyes of a child: I love to see how Lion experiences the world around him and while we can certainly do this in our own city, it is nice to be in completely new surroundings. Things that are ordinary for an adult can become magical for a child. Traveling also gives us time to slow down so that our kids can enjoy the everyday things we might otherwise rush past when we are home, like when Lion wanted to hang out with the pigeons in Greece.

Lion squatting down to be on the same level as pigeons.

3) It helps us understand that our lives and hobbies have changed, but we can still enjoy the same activities in a different way: After taking Lion on a couple of trips, I felt much better. Traveling with Lion made me realize that while our lives have changed, we could still share in our favorite hobby—and, better yet, we could share it with someone who shared with us a new way of looking at the world in a way that only a child can. We can’t hit every single site we want or spend all day in a museum anymore, but we can still hit the highlights and enjoy new cities in different ways. By being forced to slow down, we also notice more of the small details that may otherwise have gone overlooked.

The stroller took a bit of a beating on all the cobblestones and off-roading we’ve done during our travels.  Totally worth it.

4) We all get a break from most obligations and can enjoy a true vacation: It’s no secret that our families sometimes question why we travel internationally instead of taking a trip back to the West Coast. While we absolutely adore our families and want to encourage a relationship between our children and our parents and siblings, let’s be honest: those trips are not restorative and are not a vacation. Because both of our parents are divorced, we have four sets of family we need to visit, plus our brothers and friends when we go back to the West Coast. When we took Lion to California at nine months old, it was an exhausting whirlwind visiting my dad and stepmother, my mom and brother, Mr. Dolphin’s mother, Mr. Dolphin’s maternal grandfather and uncle, Mr. Dolphin’s father and stepmother, aunt, uncle and grandfather, and then spent time with a couple of my friends before taking a red eye back to DC. Lion started to cry on sight of his carseat and continued to do so for weeks because he had been moved in and out of the car so many times over the course of six days. When we’re on vacation with kids, Mr. Dolphin and I will to scale back our usual activity, work around nap schedules, and be more adaptable to how the kids are feeling. However, when visiting California or Seattle, there is a sense of obligation. We don’t get back to the West Coast as often as we would like, so whenever we are there, we feel like we have to see our parents, stepparents, siblings, and friends, resulting in a very exhausting trip.
 

A rare photo of all three of us (four if you count 24-week-old Panda) during babymoon #2.

5) It helps keep our relationship as husband and wife healthy: Travel is so fundamental to Mr. Dolphin and my relationship. It is one of our favorite things to do and share. Whenever we’ve felt like we were burning out at work or not spending enough time together, travel has been a way for us to recharge and reconnect with each other. It is one thing we do to help keep our relationship healthy because we disconnect from work and other external pressures, completely turn off our phones and spend time with each other. Being able to experience new things in another country is great for our relationship.

A selfie from the top of the Eiffel Tower ten years ago on our first international trip together.

6) Practical considerations: What would we do with the kids if we didn’t take them with us? We don’t have a babysitter that we use and Lion is very shy. He would be terrified if we left him and isn’t at an age where he would fully understand that we are coming back. He’s not familiar enough with our family since they live so far away, so we can’t rely on them to watch the kids. And honestly, I would miss the little ones if I were gone for long enough to take an international trip.

For the Kids

Just as there are significant benefits to traveling with kids for Mr. Dolphin and myself, there are plenty of advantages for Lion and Panda.

This was a trip where almost everything that could have gone wrong went wrong, but we still had a great time!  This trip solidified my desire to travel the world with children.

7) They get new experiences: There’s a difference between experience and memory. For us, it’s enough that the children will get to experience new things. Even if they won’t remember that trip to Italy or Guatemala, the experiences they have as young children will help shape how they react to future experiences. Travel will help shape who they are and change how they see the world around them.

Walking around in Cusco, Peru.

8) Travel nurtures cultural sensitivity and awareness: We want our kids to understand that there are many different cultures and while there are dominant and secondary cultures in the United States, there are so many that we don’t experience if we don’t travel. We hope that through travel, our children will learn to embrace differences and inclusiveness. While we certainly try to encourage cultural awareness at home, too, through books, museums and festivals, there is something so powerful about the immersive experience of travel.

A photo from a work trip to Brunei in 2013.

9) It encourages an adventurous heart: I want our children to be adventurous and willing to try new things. I hope they learn to try food that they’re not used to, take different forms of transportation, and explore unfamiliar terrain. I want them to embrace the unfamiliar rather than fear it. Perhaps with travel, one day they will adopt this Mark Twain quote as their motto: “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”

Lion enjoying the iron gates of an old fortress.

10) They will learn to be good travelers: By traveling at a young age, we hope that they will learn to be good travelers and appreciate that on airplanes and public transport, they must be aware that they are sharing the space with other people. We want them to be able to get through airport security with ease, to be calm when travel goes awry, and to learn to sleep in new environments. We also want them to learn to be entertained while confined in relatively tight spaces. We hope that they will learn to be good travelers because the experiences at the destination are well worth the travel.

Enjoying a beautiful hike in Montenegro.

11) Traveling cultivates patience: In the DC area where it often seems that there are a disproportionate number of A-type personalities (myself included), impatience pervades the culture. We try to teach our children patience in a variety of ways, but leaving even briefly, is a helpful reminder that much of the world does not operate at the fast pace as DC. Beyond that, travel requires waiting in line for tickets, waiting to board a plane, and waiting in airports during layovers. Mealtimes in many other countries are much more leisurely, a lovely experience in itself.

Playing with cars in the airport while I waited in line for 2.5 hours to be rebooked and rerouted after our flight was cancelled during last year’s Lufthansa strike.

12) We all spend quality time together and can nurture our relationships: Just as travel is restorative for Mr. Dolphin and my relationship, so does it allow for quality time with the kids. When we are home, too often our daily lives are filled with deadlines: rushing to get the kids fed and dressed then off to daycare; rushing through dinner so we can get to bathtime then bedtime; cleaning the house on the weekend so it is not a complete disaster come Monday morning; checking work e-mails and responding to them at all hours due to the 24/7 culture of the digital age. Traveling with our kids allows us the time to disconnect from our usual obligations and really connect, spend quality time together and appreciate each other.

No Dolphin travel albums are complete without a picture of our traveling Koala!

Travel is so important to the Dolphin family and we love having the opportunity to share this activity with our kids. I hope to share some of the tips we’ve discovered on surviving long flights and layovers with babies and toddlers, deciding whether to adjust to a new time zone, how we’ve used miles/points and other travel strategies to get where we want on a tight budget and more in future posts!