Weight has always been a tough subject for me. When I got pregnant with Little Oats, I was 200 lbs; considered ‘obese’ on most of the BMI charts. Thanks to PCOS and a mild obsession with carbs and processed sugar, my weight hadn’t budged in at least a year. I was told to limit my pregnancy weight gain as much as possible; something that deeply bothered me. I had hoped, that for once in my life, I could ignore that number on the scale and know that any pounds added were because of a baby.
During the first trimester, my morning sickness was truly awful. From week 6 to week 16, I was queasy all day and unable to keep anything down before about 11 am. The vomiting was bad enough that it ruined the enamel on my teeth and I wound up with 7 cavities. So imagine my surprise when I was down to 192 lbs at my 16 week checkup. Months of Weight Watchers didn’t do what morning sickness did for me.
I gained weight slowly but steadily over the rest of my pregnancy, and at 41 weeks I had only put on about 25lbs. I was proud of this weight gain; it was enough to sustain a healthy pregnancy, but not enough that I wouldn’t be able to lose it afterward. Starting out ‘overweight,’ I had been cautioned about potential risks, and I was grateful to have avoided gestational diabetes, pre-eclampsia, and other things that CAN be associated with large amounts of weight gain.
I was surprised again when I went to my two-week postpartum appointment at the midwives’ office and all twenty five ponds were gone. My body was a completely different shape than before — rather than carrying my weight in my upper body (boobs, stomach), I carried what was left around my middle and hips. Though the weight was gone, none of my clothes fit, and none of the styles I used to wear worked with my new body type. Everything was flabby and floppy, and though I was lighter than I had been pre-pregnancy, I certainly didn’t feel better.
As I nursed around the clock, took Little Oats out for walks all spring and summer, and made a conscious effort to get in shape, weight continued to come off. By ten months postpartum, I was down to 186 lbs, the lightest I’d been since starting to TTC in 2011. I was finally starting to feel good about my body and how my clothes fit.
And then came what I scathingly refer to as The Backlash.
Suddenly, pushing the stroller and being mindful of what I ate wasn’t cutting it anymore. The weight loss first stalled out, and then reversed entirely. When I started back to work in August, the long days of sitting at a desk started catching up to me. Nursing twice per day instead of 4, 6, 8 times left a mark as well. In the scramble to pack a lunch in the mornings, I ended up with a lunchbag full of processed carbs and little protein. Coffee, a nice treat while on maternity leave, became mandatory for functioning, and it was often full of sugar.
Between the hormone shift, a major decrease in nursing, and the return to a sedentary lifestyle, all progress I had made was gone. By the time Thanksgiving rolled around (the start to holiday-binge-eating that seems to be unavoidable at my house), I was back up to 198 lbs, and I was feeling truly awful. And when I felt awful, I ate more. Then I felt awful for eating more. So I ate. It was a vicious cycle, and I knew that it had to stop. If I wanted to sustain a second pregnancy any time in the near future, I knew my body had to be healthy.
I’ve heard from several new moms that this Backlash is a common occurrence. The baby weight all but disappears, and then when you’re least expecting it, piles back on again (often just in time to start trying for the next baby). But just because it’s common doesn’t mean I’m going to sit back and let it happen to me. Thanks to my naturopath, a ton of reading and researching, and a new Fitbit from Mr. O, I have an action plan for the new year. I know it’s cliche to jump on the ‘New Year, New You’ bandwagon, and honestly, it just happens to be the timing of this whole thing. I know I want another baby. I know I want to feel more comfortable with my body before we try for another baby. I’d really like my clothes to fit again. And a new year (plus weeks of holiday eating) mean this is the perfect time to start.
Here are five things I’m going to do to get my body back in gear:
1. Take 10,000 steps a day. This doesn’t seem like a lot of activity for those of you who are…well…active. But for me, even sticking with this basic FitBit goal, I’ll be getting more exercise than I have in months.
2. Drink 2L of water daily. I am notoriously bad for going days without drinking water. I could down 4 cups of coffee without blinking, but water is always a struggle. So another goal is to up my water intake; I know I’ll feel better.
3. Get 100g of protein. By focusing on the protein in my meals, I’ll avoid carbs and get the nutrients my body really needs. I’m thinking of Greek yogurt, protein powder smoothies, and plenty of lean meats.
4. Take my supplements. I’ve spent a fortune over the last year on naturopathic consults and supplements, and I have completely stopped taking them. I know that getting back into a routine will help, and my body will thank me for the extra vitamins, minerals, and hormone-balancing help.
5. Cut the sugar. My kitchen table right now is piled high with Christmas baking, gumdrop cake, boxes of chocolates, 3/4 of a Terry’s Chocolate Orange, and a box of Jelly Bellies. Every single one of these things is tempting me, and every single one of them will just send my insulin-resistant body deeper into a funk. So I’ll have a bite of gumdrop cake, take the chocolates to my neighbour, and save those Jelly Bellies for my next road trip.
Do you have any health-related plans for the New Year? Did you experience the postpartum Backlash?
blogger / pomegranate / 3044 posts
Kudos to you for writing this! I’m so uncomfortable talking about my weight but also experienced the backlash gain. I lost a bunch when D was first in the nicu but started gaining when he went back the 2nd time and then being home with the kids I am now the heaviest I’ve ever been. I’ve been getting up early to workout and just in the last two days I’ve started barely loosing (for the first week and a half my weight didn’t budge). I hope this new year is full of good habit for both of us!
guest
My husband just lost 40 pounds in 5 months — dropping from 230 to 190 — simply by dramatically reducing the number of carbs in his diet. No calorie counting, and he didn’t even start exercising until he hit his target weight (190). He used to eat a bagel for breakfast, cookies as snacks several times a day, and lots of potatoes, pasta, bread, etc. Now he limits himself to a “cheat” — say, a small personal pizza, or a serving of fries — 4 times per week. The first few weeks were hard — he was dizzy and light headed as his blood sugar normalized. But now he eats less, has more energy and feels great.
This might not work for everyone, but my husband saw it work for several of his friends, which is why he tried it, and a lot of research has shown that carbs are the enemy, not just sugar. So cutting sugary food items alone might not be enough if you’re still eating bread, pasta and potatoes regularly — as most Americans do.
I will also not that my husband is not a huge fan of vegetables, so he didn’t simply replace the carbs with veggies. Here’s a sample daily meal-plan:
1) Breakfast: Small *plain* yogurt with apple or banana. Orange juice.
2) Snack: Apple or banana
3) Lunch: A wrap sandwich, or rolled cold cuts w/o bread.
4) Dinner: Salad, chicken parm
coconut / 8279 posts
@Mrs.Oatmeal & @Mrs. Tiger: same boat! I lost all the weight when J was 9 months but over the past 2 years I’ve gained and I’m at my heaviest non-pregnant weight. It takes so much more effort now than it ever did before to keep it off
I’m totally on board for 2015 new healthy habits. I joined a gym with babysitting & ordered a beachbody (PiYo) challenge.
Happy 2015 – this is our year!
pear / 1696 posts
I have so much respect for you for writing this post! I’m def in the same situation, wanting to ttc for number 2 but know I need to get into better shape. I think you have inspired me to use my fitbit again!
Also the only thing that ever helped me quit sugar: https://iquitsugar.com
cantaloupe / 6730 posts
Damn backlash. Something happened around 6-7 months where I was starving all the time, so I got used to eating more. Then LO stopped nursing as much (I assume as she got better with the solids) and I didn’t change how I ate. Disaster. Sigh.
kiwi / 511 posts
Thank you for writing this, you are so very brave for putting those numbers out there.
I had the back lash, I was so excited when 2 months after giving birth I fit back into my “regular” clothes and they were a bit loose. Well here were are 2.5 years later and I am still living with the backlash. I am trying to focus on the fact that while I am heavier than I want to be I was able to stop the back lash and sustain.
It is crazy cold here this week and I hate to exercise (no really I do I don’t get those happy endorphins that many do that make exercise fun or good or whatever) so it is really a struggle for me. Prior to baby this is what worked for me and what I am starting again. I try to get an 45-60 a day and with a 2.5 and 4.5 year old that is tough. I take a mid morning walk at work around our building but inside (2 laps =10min) and then at lunch I take about 30-35 min walk outside (except when the temps are in the teens or lower or snowing/raining then I do it inside and it is usually less than 30 min) and then a mid afternoon walk (again 10). It helps break up the day and I get exercise in. When I go home I need to start working in some light weights particularly for my arms, but I will start that next week. I want to ease back into this so I have a hope of sustaining it.
Also I just stop buying snacks, luckily my kids don’t really ask for them. And when I do buy them I keep them in the freezer and my DH is a big champion and supports my choices, so if I say lets have ice cream he is the scooper and can limit the portion size so I can still have something now and then.
And one of the biggest things, I stop keeping change in my purse so it is very difficult to hit the vending machine at work. They do make it easy since they take debit and credit cards but the thought of a vending machine charge for a candy bar or chips on my bill is a great motivator to just say no and chew a piece of gum instead.
clementine / 750 posts
This happened to me as well. I gained a good twenty pounds once I stopped nursing and at the same time my job got super stressful. I had last all the baby weight so I was at one of my heaviest weight ever when we went back into fertility treatment and get pregnant again. I’m hoping to have a healthy gain this time again, but so far due to nausea issues I know I’m eating too many carbs and snacking to much but if I get too much of an empty stomach I get sick. Ugh I will have a lot of work to do after this baby comes next summer and no idea how I will do it with two kids and working full time.
GOLD / apricot / 341 posts
I have totally experienced the backlash too. I’ve attributed it to the hormone shift and everything that happens when babies start solids and nurse less. It was worse after my second baby and now with my third, I weigh as much 8 months after giving birth to her as I did when my first was born! I gained 22lbs with my first and lost 20 after. Gained 21 with my second but only lost half of that. Also: 3 babies in 40 months = not alot of recovery time at all. Now we are done having babies and I am both dreading and looking forward to refocusing on getting my healthy fit body back! Good luck in your journey!!
nectarine / 2210 posts
This post is a bit eyeopening for me, especially since the first half rings so true for me. I only gained about 25 lbs during my pregnancy, although a lot of that was due to changing my eating habits because of gestational diabetes. And now about a month after my daughter’s due due I’m back at my pre-pregnancy weight. Of course I’ve been eating crap like crazy since I now can, but hadn’t really thought about how things will change in the months to come. Definitely something to be aware of.
persimmon / 1178 posts
My backlash hit at about 20months postpartum.
As someone who has pcos and experienced life long yo-yo-ing before settling into a solid ‘medium’ (through VERY conscious effort) for the 10 year before pregnancy, weight loss after pregnancy was a dream come true. I was thrilled that my body apparently found a new, thinner normal post-partum, with no stress on my part….I was actually kind of smug about it, thinking my semi-healthy lifestyle finally paid off and my pregnancy had somehow booted pcos out the door. I bought all smaller clothes (oh, the waste!). And then, BOOM. Backlash. 10 pounds in one month and then a steady pound here and there since then.
Thank you for posting this. I have felt a lot of shame (and shame about my shame). I thought this ‘backlash’ was unique to me and it helps to see it has happened to other people.
guest
I couldn’t agree more. I gained less than 20 pounds with my TWINS and I felt amazing the month or so after they were born. But not, 16 months later nothing fits and I feel awful. But I’m so tired, who has time to work out with two babies to take care of?
pomegranate / 3032 posts
are you me? I could have written this post almost word for word. I thought i was doing so good when i found myself 10lbs below my pre pregnancy weight after a very stressful winter 6 months postpartum. Then it started creeping back on and i’ve gained 15lbs. I have no idea how to change my routine to fit in exercising, there just doesnt seem to be enough hours in the day, but i am working on my eating habits and trying to drink more water
pomegranate / 3053 posts
I can’t say that backlash hit me except when I gained 10 lbs after I stopped nursing my first. I think this is pretty common after weaning b/c our bodies are not burning those extra calories anymore and still eating the same amount. I knew better with my second so I weaned him so slowly I never gained weight after we stopped. Part of it could be due to the stresses of packing and moving with both boys and a dog overseas by myself b/c my husband had to go first. However, I’ve never been able to lose the weight I gained trying to conceive with my first. I was told not to diet when TTC so I happily ate and gained 15 lbs and it’s still with me about 6.5 years later plus that 10. I did sort of start a new year exercise routine early in December. I joined a yoga studio that offers a variety of classes. I could never bring myself to consistently go to the gym and found my place in yoga, hot yoga or Bikram style yoga since they don’t have any Bikram studios here where I live. I practiced Bikram for years before I met my husband. I started and stopped and here I am starting again. So far, it has helped with the hip problems I encountered while pregnant with my second. I’m sure therapy would have healed it but yoga has been great. I haven’t lost any weight but I do feel stronger and more energetic than I was before. I’m hoping to drop some weight through yoga and just adjusting my eating habits. I have also started “juicing.” I put them in quotes b/c I am not consistent and I don’t replace meals with juicing. It’s more of a supplement for those days I eat not so great food.
apricot / 315 posts
The same thing happened to me – I just never realized that others experienced it too! I really let go of a healthy diet & exercise plan while nursing my daughter, and experienced the backlash around the 1 year mark. I’ve been to yoyoing all year about 10-12 lbs, and after a miscarriage I feel like I’m finally taking it seriously again. I’m taking a yoga class once a week, got a replacement fitbit for Christmas, and gave away all the Christmas goodies, restocking the house with healthy snacks/foods that I know I love. The pull of sugar is so strong though! It’s the hardest part for me… I can’t go cold turkey because then I binge. Limiting what’s in the house while allowing myself a cheat once a week seems to be helping.
grapefruit / 4988 posts
I am going through this now at 15 months post-partum. I lost all the baby weight plus 10 pounds more while eating as much as I wanted (albeit on an MSPI elimination diet) when I was nursing/pumping, but since we’ve dropped to 2 nursing sessions per day and I’ve been able to expand my diet again, I’m still more hungry than usual due to nursing but the pounds keep creeping back. I’ve gained close to 10 pounds in 3 months and I can’t figure out how to make it stop. The holidays certainly didn’t help. Glad to hear I’m not alone. I’ve been feeling pretty low about it lately. I already eat pretty well (fairly low-carb and low sugar) so it is tough to find places to improve.
persimmon / 1178 posts
@catlady: we *generally* eat healthy, too. I cut out my nightly brewskie in hopes it would help and we eat vegan pizza on pizza nights, now, and I would say anything sugary like candy or cake is a 2-3 servings a week, max.
But I do like bread and chips…
Also, wanted to add that my backlash wasn’t caused by decrease in nursing- I don’t think. At the time we had been doing 4ish x a day for a while and cont. to do so for several more months. I actually quite nursing in part w/ the hopes the weight would magically disappear.
Anyway, my upset has more to do with finding myself experiencing body shame after working so hard to get to a healthy place in my 20s.
I’m too f-ing old to let the size of my panza determine my mood for the day, for the love!
So I have been trying to focus on fitness instead of weight-loss and it helps.
May the force be with you, ladies, and thanks again for sharing this blog @Mrs. Oatmeal,
grapefruit / 4291 posts
Yep, pretty much the same story here, minimal weight gain during pregnancy (10kg) and by the time I was 3-4 months pp I was down another 7kg from my pre-pregnancy weight and the skinniest I’d been for six years! I started putting the weight back on at around 9-10 months pp and my weight plateaued out at around 18 months pp (but back at my “usual” weight so at least my clothes for again!). For me it was a combination of not enough exercise and still trying to eat the huge number of calories I needed to eat in the early postpartum days.
And now here I am, 28 weeks pregnant and about to hit the same cycle all over again
blogger / honeydew / 7081 posts
I am so happy that this resonated with so many of you- and am really sorry at the same time. I really struggle with sugar/carb cravings…so I’m hoping to find a solution for that.
Good luck, everyone!
olive / 56 posts
I’m 21 months pp and once i stopped nursing around 7 mos pp, the pounds crept on. Then I went back to work. Last fall, I trained for a sprint triathlon and ran a few races but even my usual fitness level and tracking my food isn’t helping me
It’s as if my metabolism went on strike (which my dr pretty much confirmed “it’ll just take a little bit of extra work” my PCP told me). Damn our bodies for the tease – i was down to my pre-baby weight which was the lowest I’d been since I graduated college.
Damn our bodies for you know, not adjusting to the new normal. Great post and so very relatable