I am 39 weeks and change. A time when nearly any pregnant woman is oh so ready to get the show on the road already. Rather than just what I imagine is the typical discomfort and anxiousness, I feel the added stress of a ticking clock because I’m hoping to do a trial of labor after cesarean (TOLAC). Maybe what I feel is normal 39-week stress; I wouldn’t know as I have never been this pregnant before.
A little back story for those of you who weren’t around for my first pregnancy. I am lucky to be the mama of two delightfully mischievous twin boys. They were mono-di twins–meaning they shared a placenta but had separate amniotic sacs. Because of this, we always knew that I would not be permitted to go beyond 36 weeks. Baby A was breech, which would typically be an automatic c-section, but my MFM was experienced in breech delivery and gave me the option of a c-section or a induction (but would only use Pitocin, no Cervadil, etc.). After much thought and research, we opted to attempt the induction though we knew that it was fairly likely to end in a c-section. At the time I was slightly effaced but not dilated at all. After 10 hours of Pitocin, I was not dilated at all–not even a single centimeter. My medical team, Mr. Blue, and I decided it was time to proceed with a c-section. I have no regrets about that decision. There was evidence after their birth that one twin had stopped getting sufficient nutrition from the placenta, and I’m very thankful for my surgery that produced two healthy babies who only needed short NICU stays.
Meeting my Elliot and Finn for the first time. A quick kiss for both and then off to the NICU!
So here I sit, knowing they only want me to go to 41 weeks before having a repeat c-section. Induction isn’t an option for the most part. Drugs like Cervadil and Cytotec significantly increase the risk of uterine rupture, so the only things my doctor will do is augment my labor with very conservative doses of Pitocin if labor stalls, or break my water if I’m at least 2-3 cm dilated to try to get labor started. Basically, my body has to be well on its way or in active labor already for me to have a shot. Oh, and it has to do that in the next week and a half or it’s a date with the OR for me.
The fear I can’t shake is that my body just doesn’t do this, that it just doesn’t dilate. I tell myself over and over that being induced at 36 weeks and failing to dilate isn’t the same as going into natural labor when you are term. I tell myself that eventually this baby WILL come out. But that brings me back to my old friend the calendar, and with each day that is crossed off, I’m one day closer to having to have a repeat c-section. Yes, I know eventually my body would go into labor, but what if I am one of those oh-so-lucky ladies who just always carries past 41 weeks? If that’s the case, I run out of time, and I’m not comfortable refusing a c-section against my doctor’s advice.
At 37.5 weeks, I was 60% effaced and starting to soften, but only had a “dimple” in my cervix. I was actually pretty hopeful at that point. It sounded like a decent amount of progress to me at 37 weeks. After a horrendous week full of multiple rounds of contractions that would last about 2 hours and then disappear, I was really hopeful to have made some decent progress at my next appointment (2 days shy of 39 weeks). Wah wah wah. No progress. Nada. Nothing. Still 60% effaced and only a “dimple” in my cervix. I felt so defeated. My OB gave me three options as I cried in the exam room: (1) schedule a c-section anytime the following week; (2) give it another week and see if I’ve made any progress at my 40-week appointment and then decide what to do; or (3) commit to going 41 weeks, and if my cervix is still the same then have the repeat c-section at that time. He told me this is always the hardest time for people hoping to have a VBAC because you know you can say the word and end the wait and pregnancy misery, and you don’t know if waiting will get you the result for which you’re hoping.
I told him I knew I wanted to go to at least my due date, and we would think about what to so from there. So many Hellobee-ers encouraged me in a thread I posted that you can go from nothing to baby very quickly and to not give up. It was so encouraging and helped me decide I wanted to give myself the full 41 weeks, if necessary.
Even though I was so encouraged by that, every day that I don’t go into labor, I battle the stress of the calendar and question if my body will ever go into labor in the time frame I have been allotted. I am really trying to remind myself to trust my body and this baby to know when it’s the right time and stay positive in general. It’s easier said than done so far.
Now, it’s time for me to go on my merry way to continue trying every wives’ tale ever told in hopes that something will make my body and this baby get things going in the next 10 days. I’ll definitely be disappointed if I don’t get to at least try for a VBAC, but at the end of the day, I want my sweet baby boy happy and healthy in my arms. I can come to terms with the alternative, but it sure would be cool if he’d do his mama a favor and come on his own!
Send me some labor vibes & any encouraging stories you can spare!
coconut / 8279 posts
sending you labor vibes!
even if your body doesn’t dilate, it doesn’t mean that it’s wrong.
my bestie wanted to avoid an induction at all costs. she did hypnobirthing, had a midwife, hired a doula, did acupucture, went to a chiropractor, used evening primrose, red raspberry leaf tea, bounced on the birthing ball in addition to DTD, long walks, spicy foods, etc. she went to 42 weeks, 1 day and her midwife suggested castor oil to avoid pitocin/cervidil. it did the trick, sent her right into labor! – but she never dilated past 3 and had a csection.
wishing you the delivery of your dreams, but please don’t feel bad if it’s just not meant to be, sometimes it’s not up to us. and that’s okay, too.
pomegranate / 3779 posts
Good luck! I hope that this little one comes soon and that your labor experience is everything you hope it will be.
apricot / 364 posts
I was the opposite for both pregnancies…walked around for 3 weeks at 3/4 cm both times before having to be induced because never had contractions. Hopefully you’ll just go from 0-10 in a hurry and get your hoped for delivery.
GOLD / wonderful coconut / 33402 posts
Good luck!!
grapefruit / 4441 posts
Good luck! Hope baby comes soon!
pea / 8 posts
Good luck! It sounds like you’re doing a great job keeping a positive attitude and perspective. I highly recommend red raspberry leaf tea
Also, would your doctor consider sweeping your membranes if you have dilated a bit? Every woman responds differently, but this was highly effective for me with both of my pregnancies.
blogger / pomegranate / 3201 posts
Lots of love! I am also hoping for a vbac and I really hope things go smoothly for you!!
persimmon / 1472 posts
Sending lots of love and positive labor thoughts!!!
I know exactly what you mean by going against the calendar – it is impossible to not count down the days when you are running against a clock. DD1 was born via c-section after 16 hours of labor and 3 hours of pushing due to a brow-out posterior position. She was wedged in there and not budging! My midwife let the OB on-call see if they could try the vacuum or forceps but she was so stuck they said it was not recommended. When I became pregnant with DD2 I immediately knew I wanted to try for a VBAC. Some of it stems from residual disappointment from not being able to push DD1 out even though I went labored and pushed but mostly because I, too, wanted to believe my body could birth a baby naturally. At my 37 week appointment, I begged my OB to do an internal exam because I neeeeeded to know where my body was at. To my surprise I was already 3 cm dilated! I was so excited and hopeful, telling myself I was certain I would be able to attempt a VBAC. Then the 38 and 39 and 40 week appointments came and went, with all three appointments showing I was 4 cm dilated but no contractions. None! At the 39 week appointment my OB told me that I should schedule the c-section for 41 weeks as a back-up. I was so upset after that appointment. Having a set date to run against was mentally challenging! I tried everything in the book – walking, bouncing on the ball, evening primrose oil, red raspberry leaf tea, dtd, stairs, etc. By 40+3 I told DH this was it – baby was stubborn and I will have a repeat c-section. And I cried. I know the baby will be safe regardless of delivery method but I felt defeated. On the morning of 40+5, we dropped DD1 with my parents and DH took me out for a nice breakfast. There, while waiting for our table out on the sidewalk (for an hour!) I started having contractions! DH claims I was determined to eat those fancy pancakes and thought it was hilarious that I was having contractions through the wait, ordering, and eating. We ended up checking into the hospital by 3pm that day and DD2 was born just after midnight on 40+6 one day shy of my scheduled c-section! My OB had to break my waters around 5 cm due to stalled labor but that was enough to push me the rest of the way. Hopefully this story will give you some encouragement!
By the way, I love that pic of you with your twin boys. So sweet!!!
blogger / cherry / 204 posts
Sending good vibes your way! I think it sounds like you are really in a great frame of mind about everything, I can’t wait to hear the birth story!
clementine / 849 posts
Good luck!
I was a 0 at 39 weeks, a FOUR at 40 weeks, and went into labor at 40+2!
wonderful pomelo / 30692 posts
Good luck! I hope you go into labor soon!
apricot / 453 posts
I was in a similar boat at my 39 week check (w/ my 2nd baby) hoping for a VBAC. They told me to schedule a c-section but we could cancel it if I went into labor on my own. Which I did at 39 weeks 4 days. I had some minor contractions at 39 weeks 3 days but went away and then baby was ready the next evening. Keeping you in my thoughts
Oh and had a successful, fairly easy, VBAC.
blogger / pomelo / 5361 posts
@rachiecakes: Totally agree about it not meaning I/my body am a failure if it doesn’t work. Good to remember!
@theknest: @littleveesmommy: thank you both for sharing your stories! They were really encouraging to me.
kiwi / 558 posts
Sending you lots of good labor vibes for your VBAC to happen!! Also you look amazing in your photo!!
guest
I’ve been there. I ended up having a successful VBAC, 5 hours before a scheduled repeat C-section at 41 weeks. He waited until the last minute but he came, all on his own. Good luck!
blogger / pomegranate / 3491 posts
Sending you all the labor vibes (except for the ones I’m keeping for myself
). Xoxoxo
cherry / 248 posts
Sending good vibes your way. I have 4 year old mono di twin boys who I delivered vaginally at 36 weeks 4 days. I was very lucky that my water broke so I knew I’d go into labor though contractions didn’t start right away so with my next pregnancy I was worried that I wouldn’t know when I was on labor. My boys’ delivery went well but I had an epidural since I had to deliver in the or in case of an emergency c section if twin b flipped. Luckily I was able to delivery both vaginally but in hindsight my recovery was harder with the r diurnal and all the fluids from the iv. Plus having been on bed rest for 7 weeks prior to delivery.
My second pregnancy went great and i worked up until the day i delivered. At 37 weeks i was 3cm dilated so i was hopeful it would be soon but then 38 weeks and i was still 3cm. Then 39 weeks my ob stripped my membranes and 2 days later i delivered. I had contractions on and off for two weeks and that day after stripping my membranes i had them pretty strong all day but not consistent. I went to bed and woke up at 2:30am thinking this is it. I woke my husband and told him to shower so we could go soon and called my doctors service. By 3:51 ammy husband was parking the car after dropping me off at the door till the hospital and I was now in labor. We got to labor and delivery and i was at 7 cm. They quickly transfered me to a delivery room and I wanted an epidural but as they were prepping me my water broke and I just needed to push. My daughter was born at 4:53 am. My doctor didn’t make it in time. Some resident ran in and delivered her. Needless to saw it was quick but i must saw my recovery was so easy this time. I felt great afterwards. After twins this was so much easier on my body. Hope it is for you too.
guest
our CNM – certified nurse midwives who practice in the hospital, didn’t do checks before people go into labor on their own for the specific reason that they do not actually tell you anything someone can stay 2 cm dialated for weeks or go from 0 -10 cm really quickly. Don’t put much stock in the checks.
apricot / 288 posts
I had my water broken to induce labor for my vbac and it worked like a charm. Give your body the longest amount of time your doctor thinks is safe to see what happens in your own. pm if you have any questions. Good luck.
pomelo / 5220 posts
good luck! Sending you lots of labor vibes!
pomegranate / 3225 posts
Good luck! Cant wait to hear when he is born. Hope your vbac is successful!
guest
This isn’t an old wives tale… Have sex! As uncomfortable as you are, semen helps with cervix ripening, so give it a try! I have heard of this working to kickstart labor in many situations!
pomegranate / 3053 posts
Whatever happens you know you’ll make the right decision for you and your baby when the time comes. Good luck and I do hope you get your VBAC. I have to admit that I was too afraid to do it so you’re brave to even want to.
honeydew / 7295 posts
I hope you get your wish! Most babies do seem to come before 41 weeks but if yours doesn’t you’ll at least know you tried everything.
guest
I’m 39 weeks and thinking of you!
guest
Good Luck! I totally know what you’re going through. Had a c-section with #1 (fetal distress) and throughout pregnancy #2 was told I was a good candidate for VBAC. I didn’t feel that strongly about it but wanted to try especially since if we decide to go for #3, wanted to set us up for as natural birth as possible. At 39 weeks I felt great. By my 40 week check up, I started to feel so much stress and anxiety of how it would all play out. Ultimately ended up scheduling a c-section for 41 weeks. The night before surgery my water broke at 11pm. Went to hospital thinking we would just proceed with scheduled surgery, but my OB and all nurses were so supportive of trying for VBAC. Had epidural at 8am, started pushing at noon and #2 arrived at 1pm. In a way, you’re lucky because you’ve had the c section experience, so you know what to expect if it goes down that road. But you’ll hope for a VBAC and a healthy baby no matter what. Our bodies are amazing at what they can do!
pea / 23 posts
Hoping for the very best for you! Hang in there and just keep telling yourself that everything happens for a reason.
I carried my first (daughter) for 41+ weeks and went into labor with her on the day that I was scheduled to be induced. I labored for 24hrs and only made it to 1cm dialated. I had a C-section and it turns out that her cord was in a true-knot. If I had delivered her vaginaly that knot would have pulled and she likely would have suffered lack of oxygen and at least some level of deficeit. Because of my c-section and the expertice of my OB, I was blessed with a healthy perfect baby. I went on to have mono-di twins 19months later by C-section at 38weeks. (My doctor didn’t feel that a twin VBAC was a safe option so soon after a cesarian) and we were again blessed with twin boys that didn’t even need a NICU stay!
So, please remember that sometimes the best that you can do is keep an open mind and pray that whatever happens, you will end your journey with your own health and a healthy little bundle to be showered with love!
blogger / pomelo / 5361 posts
@Bunches: I was actually praying something very similar to that last night. Great reminders. How was the age gap between your twins and singleton? Ours will be 22 months apart.
pea / 23 posts
@Blue: Singleton then 19 months later the twins came. Because it was a high risk mono-di pregnancy my doctor advised against a VBAC. If I had had twins first and then a single pregancy, I would’ve wished to try for a VBAC for sure though!
papaya / 10560 posts
Hey friend! You are looking precious! It will be the best possible outcome whatever happens. Praying you get what you hope for. Things can go from nothing to something so quickly. The end is always the hardest!
grapefruit / 4770 posts
Hope you’re hanging in there.
coffee bean / 27 posts
I know I am late to the party on this one, but I wanted to send you good vibes. Hang in there mama. I know how stressful it is, and how miserable the last few weeks of this crazy waiting game can be. Good luck with your journey to meeting the next member of your family!