On the morning after the election, I told the girls very casually that Donald Trump had won and waited for their reactions. I didn’t want to make a big deal out of it, although it clearly was a HUGE deal, and I was basically a zombie after having fallen asleep with my phone in my hand and discovering the news at 5 a.m. HJ, who is 8 years old, just looked at me and said,

“But Mommy, Donald Trump says mean things.”

“I know…” I said. And pretty much stopped at that.

I wish that I had responded with just the right words that would explain and reassure and do everything we want our parents to do when we are confused, but I was truly at a loss for words.

So HJ took her own spin on the news by shrugging it off and saying, “Well, Hillary Clinton won our school election.”

The day before, the girls had proudly voted in their mock election, with Lila, my kindergartner, mainly choosing Hillary because “she is a girl,” obviously.

After school, they had excitedly come with me to vote for real, watching me mark off my choices in the voting booth, helping me scan my ballot, and picking up their “I voted” stickers.

But other than election day, I had been pretty negligent about talking to them about the candidates and the big issues at stake. With the girls only being 5 and 8, I guess I assumed that it wasn’t really on their radar. My mistake there was that they were already hearing snippets here and there on the news, at school, and among adult conversations.

Particularly for HJ, who is now in third grade, the kids were actually talking about the election quite a bit. I heard a few things from the parents at the bus stop, like this joke that they were telling each other:

“Both Trump and Clinton are on the same plane. The plane comes crashing down. Who is saved?”

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The punchline?

“America.”

The other mom and I both had the same reaction — how sad that this is the state of American politics!

I don’t know how much the girls fully understood other than that they wanted to see a woman president and that Donald Trump was mean, but I suppose at some simplistic level that essentially summed things up!

After the results of the election were in, I heard various things from parents at different districts. Some schools were actively encouraging students to process their feelings about the election and reassuring them that they were safe and their families were safe, especially in areas with a more diverse student population that included many immigrant children. Some principals sent out letters to all the parents in the district, affirming their inclusive policies. Some parents asked whether counselors would be made available. Other parents were upset that school funds and school time were being used and wanted everyone to just move on.

Another mom and I talked about how we were avoiding Facebook the day after, but when I went to check the posts later in the week I saw that the election posts were still coming. I tried to keep an open mind, but still found myself surprised by the strong emotions being expressed by many people on both sides. On the other hand, some parents were actively trying to combat the negativity by posting on lighter and funnier topics, or trying to do something positive by taking the kids with them to volunteer.

The truth is, I am worried about the future. I am worried because although my husband and I were both born in the United States, we are still a minority and our children will still be seen as a minority because of their appearance. I am worried about the refugee families in Chicago that my children have gotten to know. I am worried because I have daughters, and because they hear things and absorb things from the culture that are negative and demeaning.

Overall, though, I’m trying to keep perspective and trying not to despair. Many people have reminded me how lucky we are to live in a democratic country, where we are free to make choices every day, where we are currently safe from war and famine, and where our girls have the opportunity to grow up and know that they can become the president of their country one day.

As Hillary said in her concession speech last week, “And to all the little girls who are watching this: never doubt that you are valuable and powerful and deserving of every chance in the world to pursue your dreams.”

As a mom to two young daughters, I’m taking those words to heart.