I never realized that I could worry this much about one little person. I knew my life would change when Baby H arrived, but I didn’t know that I would worry/stress/search online like a crazy person about every little thing.
Yes, that’s right, if you looked at my online search history for the past 4 weeks, you would see some of the craziest things. Thus far in Baby H’s life, Mr. H and I have obsessed over the following topics:
- What does a strong umbilical cord stump smell mean?
- How much weight should a newborn lose after birth?
- How much weight should a newborn gain each day?
- How long will it take for my milk to come in?
- How can I make my milk come in faster?
- How do I take a baby’s temperature?
- Why hasn’t my newborn pooped in 4 days?
- What does bright green baby poop mean?
- Why is my baby spitting up at night?
- How to do I get a fussy newborn to sleep at night?
- Why is my newborn’s nose stuffy?
We’ve had a lot of little things happen in the past month of having Baby H in our lives. Fortunately, everything has been minor and we haven’t had any true scares with her health, but when things gravitate away from what is considered “normal” we get completely freaked out. It seems like we figure out one thing only to tackle the next situation that comes our way.
At our first pediatrician appointment when Baby H was 4 days old, we found out that she was down a full pound from her birth weight. She was also showing signs of dehydration – dry lips and mouth and a hoarse cry. My milk simply hadn’t come in yet, so we had to supplement with formula for 2 days until she was able to breastfeed. She pooped the day we started the formula and then we didn’t get another poop from her for 5 full days. We were terrified that something was majorly wrong, and were searching online like crazy while waiting to hear back from our pediatrician (our conclusion: combination of formula and breast milk in her system threw things off). It’s amazing how excited two people can be about poop – we rejoiced when she finally had a big poopy diaper!
But, of course, we went from worrying about no poop to worrying about the poop that we were seeing. All the books and websites say it should have been a mustard-like yellow color, but we were seeing some very green poop! With online searching, we found that this could mean she wasn’t getting enough hind milk, or she had an intolerance to the dairy I was eating. Or, well, it could mean nothing. After debating cutting dairy out of my diet completely and paying close attention to how she was nursing, we spoke with our pediatrician at our next appointment who assured us that newborn poop could be any range of colors and not to worry about it.
I wonder what parenthood would be like for us without the ability to do internet searches around the clock. I’m sure we’d have an arsenal of parenting and child development books, and would call our parents and pediatrician much more frequently with questions. However, at 3am when Baby H is fussing like crazy, it’s much easier to look online for tips on quieting her down than waking up my mom to ask for suggestions.
On the flip side, while internet searches offer convenience, they can overwhelm you sometimes with even more worry than you had before you started. Medical articles highlight a wide range of any and every health problem that might occur in relation to the symptoms you’re looking up. At 3am this can cause a world of worry that keeps you up all night. One night I was so paranoid because Baby H was spitting up that I stared at her as she slept in her co-sleeper until the sun came up, while searching online for what could be causing the spit up. Having that much information at your fingertips can be both empowering and debilitating.
I hope that as we continue with parenthood we’ll learn to relax a little bit more. Of course we want to be aware, informed and proactive parents, but we also need to draw the line between caring about our baby’s well-being and worrying over each and every breath she takes.
But seriously, with a face like this, how can you not worry?!
Do you “run” straight to the internet and obsess over each and every problem your baby may have?
pomegranate / 3225 posts
This is so true. I’m pregnant and google searching everyday! Sometimes I think things must have been less stressful to live in a world where we didn’t have information at our fingertips… sometimes I’m relieved though.
hostess / wonderful persimmon / 25556 posts
Awww.
I honestly don’t know how I am going to react when our girl is here. I don’t worry too much about things going on with me or my husband. Even pregnant, once I got past that first trimester, I stopped Googling stuff, figured everything was okay, my body knew what it was doing. With a fussy newborn who can’t express what is wrong? I’m really nervous about that!!
Love that face.
pomegranate / 3414 posts
I learned during my last pregnancy that the internet can be both friend and foe. After my LO arrived I had the luxury (I guess) of being restricted to how many times I went up or down the stairs and since I spent most days downstairs and the computer was upstairs I didn’t search too much. With this pregnancy, I find that I often look first to the internet to see what others have said and then if I don’t feel that adequate I’ll call my doctor. Not sure what I’m going to do when the baby comes since we now have a computer hooked to our TV downstairs so the internet will be at my fingertips (despite stair restrictions).
I often think we would be better off if we didn’t have all this information at our fingertips because the world was so much simpler when I was growing up.
grape / 89 posts
I know exactly how you feel. Ive been paranoid about every little thing. Our LO lost a full pound too and had to be re-admitted to the hospital because of jaundice and eating issues. He is completely fine now, but I run to google like a neurotic first time mom with every little thing. When will the worry end?
blogger / pomegranate / 3300 posts
I didn’t worry do much. I also didn’t use the Internet much. I learned my lesson when I was pregnant. I looked up twin to twin transfer when we were diagnosed and I was a mess until they were born.
Instead of Internet searches is used the book “Caring for your baby and young child. Birth to five years”. It’s put out by the American Academy of Pediatrics. It was a great reference for health concerns, what is ok and when you need to go to the doctor, milestone averages and other basics for child care
Now that I am on my fourth baby I hardly look at it any more. I figure I did pretty good with my other three so I don’t worry too much. It’s perfectly normal to worry and want reassurance that your baby is ok. It will lessen over time and you will start to get into a groove of what’s normal and what’s out of the ordinary for your baby. I hope the 3 o clock fussiness goes away soon. That’s always tough.
pea / 11 posts
As much as I rely on the internet for all sorts of info I have a feeling that my mother will be more useful than Google when the time comes. She’s got the relevant information and the ability to keep me from going totally nutso…
clementine / 889 posts
I tried to avoid internet searches and asked my stepmom who is also a nurse. She was my first line of defense to avoid pestering the pediatrician will a plethora of crazy-new-mom questions.
blogger / nectarine / 2010 posts
I’m so guilty of consulting Dr. Google for everything! The other night I was searching “night waking 5 month old.” I found a whole bunch of people whose babies don’t STTN at 5mos old. Not really necessary reading at 3:30am. Guess what he did the next night? STTN just like he has for the past several months. When will I learn to just roll over and go back to sleep when he does?!
guest
my son is 12 days old and I too find myself googling at all hours of the day. Mostly about feeding. Nothing like convincing yourself of the worst at 2am! I also, cannot seem to leave him in his bassinet by our bed. So, he has been cosleeping with us, on my chest. Ha. I used to say that I would “never” bed share. Ha. But, he is just so precious, and if he is on my chest the I am not staring at him every 3 minutes wondering if he is still alive, or spitting up, or giving feeding cues.
GOLD / squash / 13464 posts
One of my good friends is a pediatric nurse practitioner and she’s also due to have her baby 4 months before me. I’ve already warned her that she will be getting constant calls/texts from me. I’m not too ashamed to send you a picture message of my baby’s poo and ask you if it looks normal!! : )
blogger / wonderful cherry / 21628 posts
I try to never consult Dr. Google because I always freak myself out! I wonder if that will change when I have a LO.
hostess / wonderful honeydew / 32460 posts
so cute! I didn’t obsess much, but my LO didn’t do anything to make me stress really.
GOLD / wonderful grape / 20289 posts
Usually I start my research on the internet. I’ll look things up, then as here for real people advice, and still call the doctor. I figure I might as well cover all of my bases, but of course 99% just listen to what the doctor says.
Wishing I would have listened to my doctor about treating LO’s diaper rash…. but I’m trying (but failing) to find something that works with cloth diapers.