Hellobee

How far along: 25 Weeks

Weight gain: up 12 pounds

Due date: April 23rd (my first was 2 weeks late, so I’m trying to be flexible on that date :))

Birthplan: Hoping for a VBAC but with my family history, not expecting one

Sex: Girl

Name: Zoe Elizabeth. My husband and I have been together since we were 14 and thought that we would end up with all girls. We have had this name picked out since we were 18/20 years old. Combine that 10-year-old name with the miscarriage from early last year, and it feels like we have been waiting for this particular baby for an eternity.

I thought it would be fun to do a little comparison between the two pregnancies with the rest of the pregnancy observations.

First trimester: Utterly exhausting. The difference was less nausea and a ton more emotional than the first time around. I was a hormonal crying mess anytime I thought about an experience I might get emotional about. Having been pregnant before, I knew how much I needed to eat and how often, cutting down on the nausea. I was nervous about this pregnancy in the first trimester, wanting to hold this pregnancy close and protect it, while also being fearful of getting too hopeful or attached.

Second trimester: Glorious second trimester, oh how I love thee!! Fantastic with both pregnancies, feeling like myself 85% of the time and having a fun little bump to show off. This pregnancy has been marked by a dramatic increase in excitement in a new baby and reduction in the fear and nervousness of new life.

Movement: Both times I didn’t feel real movement until about 17 weeks and this one has been a crazy dancer. I have been watching her movement and am just blown away by how much I can see. I think it may have something to do with starting this pregnancy at a lower weight and gaining less weight thus far.

Readiness: With Eli, I planned so much and researched baby items, getting his room ready as soon as possible. This baby, I just keep putting it all off. We are talking about some big changes coming up in our future, hopefully within the next 6 months if not sooner, that would involve moving to a different state, a different job and me not working. Since we have our life so up in the air, all of my nesting instincts have been channeled into cleaning out our house and trying to design it in a sellable state.

Pains: My hip pain with pregnancy either showed up earlier this pregnancy or I’m just paying more attention, but I’ve been seeing a chiropractor every couple weeks since week 19 as opposed to starting at 32 weeks last time.

Prenatal care: I am with an ob practice this time around and wow is it different. With Eli I had midwives and planned a water birth. I’m hedging my bets that I’ll end up with another c-section and wanted to have familiar faces around this time. I miss the midwives. I miss the gentle care and the holistic approach. I miss having someone sit down when they come into the room and talk to me and not feel like I’m being rushed.

.  .  .  .  .

This planned and hoped for pregnancy has mainly just been different in that the fear is far outweighed by excitement. I can’t wait to have her here with us, and to watch Eli get to know his baby sister. Those first few days with a new baby were so magical, soft and holy that I am just really really looking forward to going to that time again. My pregnancy with Eli was this great big group affair. I had no idea what was going on, had no clue how we would manage and was looking to everyone, friends, family, coworkers to help me out and guide us along. This time, this pregnancy feels like it’s more “ours” and less “everyone else’s.”