For the past six months, we’ve been on a seemingly endless loop of two unending conversations around our home, revolving around two big questions:
- Is there a “right” or “wrong” reason for having another kid?
- How much uncertainty is too much?
Not easy questions, of course. Questions with “answers” that seem to shift based on mood, or something we read that day, or the position of former-planet-Pluto in the sky at high noon.
I mean, not really that last one, but you get it.
As with all things in life, what is one ‘right’ reason for me may be a ‘wrong’ reason for you. But is there a universally accepted element that screams YOU MUST HAVE ANOTHER CHILD? Or, maybe more glaringly, YOU MUST NOT? I decided to poll some mama friends because my partner and I exist in this never-ending circle of “maybe we should!”
A few themes emerged from this crowdsourcing experiment and they have very little to do with the actual reality of having a baby and more to do with the foundation of the relationship/partnership of the two people seeking to have another kid (or…not). Namely:
“I think it just depends on the family what the right reasons may be… I’ve certainly never seen kids in an unstable marriage save a marriage or end well ever. I’ve seen marriages fall apart over kids, never saw the opposite. I’m far from an expert, but kids are rough and I feel your marriage needs to be rock solid.”
and:
“I think reasons vary by family, and the reasons that may be right for one family aren’t enough for another. For example, I think a very wrong reason to have a child is to try to fix an ailing marriage/relationship.”
and finally:
“I have never seen “saving the marriage” kids successfully save the marriage… babies are not an effective tool to save a relationship.”
Every single mama I asked noted that – we can all agree – what’s wrong for one family might be right for the other. That doesn’t leave me any better off, but there are a few very impactful comments that share what ‘right’ and ‘wrong’ look like for some families, including:
“I definitely think that what’s right for one family could be wrong for another. I think one aspect that doesn’t get discussed a lot in the debate on whether to have more is the health of either or both parents. For myself, this is a major determining factor….the risks go up dramatically for me with each subsequent surgery and pregnancy. So part of my decision making process involves how the potential health risks could affect not only my pregnancy and new child, but also my ability to take care of [my current child]. I don’t want to compromise my physical parenting abilities for [my current child], which is a major possibility.”
One friend’s comment really resonated with me, and seemed to capture much of what I feel on the days when I feel more strongly that I’m ready to have a second child:
“Many people want have more kids to give their child a sibling while my desire to have another is completely unrelated to [my current child] having a sibling. I just really want to experience pregnancy, a newborn, and childhood over and over, and experience raising a new different human.”
As with the mama just above, my desire for doing this whole amazing biological thing again is STRONG but, for me, is met with strong resistance when I consider that I just now feel like I’m getting back to who I want to be, mentally and physically. I am finally having more time to be social, and active, and do things like read again! I often wonder if waiting ‘so long’ to consider having another- William will be three this year – has colored my view. If we’d had a second one sooner, more back-to-back, I wouldn’t have had time to adjust to my new normal of life with one little person and my partner. Adjust to a world where I can go to yoga three times a week, and run a few other nights a week, and see my friends a few times a month. When last minute social engagements are fun rather than daunting because I know my kid can hang for a few hours while we do that adult conversation thang.
The idea of starting all over again – the hard overwhelming sometimes barely survivable difficult to describe fourth trimester, the teething, the sleeping through the night (OR NOT!!!) – feels so.freaking.exhausting. I read that sentence back to myself and I know – that’s selfish. There are so many reasons to have another kid, but sometimes they don’t seem…big enough.
My partner and I come back to a third, smaller question – one that another mama friend shared in her own words:
“We’ve likely chosen not to have another child because neither of us can pull the trigger and say, “I definitely want another child.” Other women I’ve spoken to have taken this ambiguity as a sign that they should have another, their reasoning being that neither partner can state, “I don’t want another child.”
I can’t say we don’t want another one. Instead, we ask ourselves: “Will we always wonder ‘what if we HAD raised a second child?'” Add that question to the all the ‘right’ reasons we should have another kid – we love being parents, we can financially provide for a second child while also mostly maintaining the lifestyle we’d like to lead, we would love for our son to have a sibling, and beyond – and we’ve settled, I think.
The feather that tipped the proverbial scale for us, right there. It’s time to try for a second kid.
(I think! Ha!)
What say you? What was the right reason for your family to expand or stay the size you are now? Is there a right or wrong reason?
cherry / 237 posts
My two are 3.5 years apart, and though we were pretty much always sure we’d have two kids, I felt very strongly the same pangs of regret over losing my autonomy *again* when I just felt like I was getting it back. I will say that those feelings did color the pregnancy for me, making me feel impatient and a little frustrated with the process, but they also gave me the motivation to get back to myself much sooner than I did with my first pregnancy. What took a year and a half with my first (getting interested in physical activity, making time and space for myself as a person, seeking out hobbies and interesting activities) took practically no time the second time around.
cherry / 141 posts
I sort of knew I would have a second pregnancy and we even decided when we would have the discussion about having a second. We liked the idea of having kids 3 1/2 years apart. We prayed about if we should have another. After one particular service my husband and I looked at eachother and we knew we were suppose to have a second.
When we decided that we were ready to give it a go we fell pregnant (luckily) right away. Our kids are 3 1/2 years apart almost exactly. Now we are DONE. Our second actually turned out to be the easier child but we were more stable as partners as well. We knew more of our quirks and really took the extra effort to support one another. The support is so integral and I can’t imagine having a second or third or etc if the support wasn’t there.
persimmon / 1281 posts
“We’ve likely chosen not to have another child because neither of us can pull the trigger and say, “I definitely want another child.” <— this is us right now. We're not closing the door for good but at this point our DS is 19 months old and neither of us feel like someone is missing from our family. No vasectomies are happening quite yet but we're definitely happy with how things are right now.
kiwi / 549 posts
When my Granny died suddenly 9 years ago, I watched my mom and her 4 siblings come together, supporting each other. And that’s what did it for me. I knew I wanted kids, and I wanted them to have siblings to be there with them after I was dead and gone. So having only 1 was always a non-starter for me. But now that we have 2, the question is whether to have a 3rd.
guest
I thought our son would be an only child for a long time – it took me two years to recover from that fourth trimester, which is just so so draining. Our daughter is now 19 months and I feel like we just crossed back into the fun zone where we can really enjoy each of our kids. I personally find that first year or year-and-a-half with a baby to be really hard and had to remind myself that we would turn a corner eventually frequently with my daughter. But we did and all is well…but we are 100% done!!
clementine / 911 posts
@Portboston: That’s where we are right now too. The main reason I consider a second child is to provide my daughter a playmate and sibling and all the childhood memories and experiences that come along with that relationship. But is that fair to the second child and a good enough reason? When the 3 of us are spending time together, I don’t feel like anyone is missing.
persimmon / 1281 posts
@krispi: exactly. I can’t justify having a second to provide DS with a friend because I’m not close with my sibling (and never have been). So if we decide in a second, we have to want it for us.
papaya / 10343 posts
We debated and I really struggled with it. Mostly for the reason you stated— I’m just starting to feel like an autonomous person again and do I really want to get dragged down into the muck of pregnancy and babyhood again? Ultimately I realized everything on my “con” list would be resolved in 5 years max. Everything on my “pro” list was life-long. So we decided to look at it like graduate school. Kind of a pain in the ass, expensive, sometimes downright painful… but ultimately worth all the hassle lol. (I’m 14 weeks so lets hope I don’t regret this reasoning….)
pomegranate / 3393 posts
Thanks for this post. This is something I really struggle with. I just turned 38 and my son is about to turn 4. It just really seems like the clock is ticking. There are so many good reasons not to have another child- finances, space in our house, how easy everything is now and how fun our little family of 3 is- but that doesn’t stop my powerful urge and desire to do it all again, at least one more time! I loved pregnancy, the baby days, all of it. I haven’t wrapped my head around the concept that it might never happen again. But I’m in the middle of a degree program and I have no time for anything- how could I give a new baby the attention it deserves? Back and forth, back and forth!