Several months ago, Mr. Blue and I decided we should make a “To Do Before We Have Babies” list. I lovingly refer to it as the DINK (Double Income No Kids) To-Do List. Many people have a checklist of things to do before kids like buy a house, change jobs, etc., but those tasks are not the variety you’ll find on our list. The DINK To-Do list is primarily a reminder of all the fun things that we want to be intentional about doing and enjoying as much as possible before I get pregnant and we have a baby! Some items on the DINK To-Do List can certainly be done pregnant or with a newborn, but they seem like they would be easier and more enjoyable now.
A few weekends ago, Mr. Blue and I headed up to one of our favorite Texas cities, Dallas. Mr. Blue grew up in and around Dallas, and I lived there prior to our wedding. Anytime we head back to the Big D, it’s a good time full of our favorite friends, restaurants, and events. It was the perfect chance to check some items off the DINK List!
Here’s a peek at a few items on our list and our progress to date:
1. Go on one more big trip before baby.
We haven’t quite got this one checked off the list, but we will soon be heading to sunny Florida and Puerto Rico for one last baby-free trip. Our itinerary is full of non-pregnancy/baby friendly things, like a hotel over a salsa bar, an adult-only hotel, a sailing adventure with snorkeling and an open bar, kayaking the bioluminescent bay at night, and trekking through the rain forest. We can’t wait for our adventure, which also coincides nicely with our first month of official baby making. Hello, Conceptionmoon!
2. Drink lots of red wine.
While Mr. Blue and I are not huge drinkers, we enjoy a weekly happy hour or an occasional drink with dinner. What I love most of all is the lovely, relaxing warmth of a glass of red wine. I’m a self-proclaimed red wine junkie (not to be confused with an actual connoisseur), and it’s something that I will really, really miss when I’m pregnant. Throughout our Dallas weekend, we made sure to get extra doses of red wine at … well, almost every meal, but especially when we joined some of my former coworkers at a great wine joint in East Dallas called Times Ten, where I enjoyed some guilt-free imbibing.
3. Attend more sporting events/non-baby friendly events.
There’s something about the ballpark that just makes me feel full of rainbows, lollipops, and sunshine. Mr. Blue was a Texas Rangers fan in utero, and he lives and breathes the Rangers. This means I always have a great idea for birthday presents, and our trip was partly to use some tickets I gave Mr. Blue for his birthday. When I lived in Dallas, we went more often, but now that we’re six hours away, it takes a lot more travel and effort to make a game. I know many trips to the ballpark will happen with our kiddos in tow, but braving the Texas heat and crowds to watch a baseball game just doesn’t sound fun when I think of doing it pregnant or with a tiny baby. Besides, can you even go to a baseball game without drinking beer and eating some seriously heartburn inducing food?? Answer: not in my world.
4. Use our new camping gear we got for the wedding. Camp somewhere we can do some hiking.
Big. Fat. FAIL. But, the summer is still young, so hopefully we’ll get some camping in before morning sickness or a newborn turn me into Medusa.
5. Go see a movie at least once a month.
Another big FAIL. I think we’ve seen one movie since we talked about this list several months ago. What is wrong with us? Movies while pregnant (read: when I have to pee even more than I do now) or with a fussy newborn just isn’t going down in the Blue house. We definitely need to work in a few more trips to see a movie or play soon.
6. Each of us go on at least one more guys/girls weekend.
A few weekends ago, I went to see one of my girlfriends who lives in the Texas Hill Country. It was such an amazing weekend! We had a lot of wine and tacos and went to every antique and home decor store within an hour radius: basically, we did everything I love! I know that when our kids are a little older it will be easier to get away for a girls’ weekend, but I wanted to enjoy one more completely carefree weekend with one of my besties before having to worry about a little one. As for Mr. Blue, he and his boys are busily planning a camping trip at the end of June, so we’re actually doing a pretty good job of making time for trips with friends.
7. Lose the newlywed weight we’ve put on.
This is definitely the most “not fun” thing on our list. There’s no way I can say we’ve entirely succeeded, but it is something we’re trying to be more conscientious about. A full post will be coming soon about our efforts. We aren’t seeing much weight loss yet but are definitely feeling a bit healthier again.
8. Eat at all of our favorite non-baby friendly restaurants.
I’m really hoping to be the kind of parent that still can enjoy an occasional dinner out with the kids, but there are some places that I just can’t see taking little ones. Romantic places, tightly packed places, lots of breakable things, and no kid-friendly food all fall on my list of places I should really enjoy now while I’m not chasing a toddler.
With that in mind, we went to one of my all time favorite restaurants for an early birthday celebration with Female Soul Mate and her husband. Female SM is not only turning 30 a week before me, but is my in real life TTC buddy, so we had lots to celebrate. Tillman’s Roadhouse in the Bishops Arts District of Dallas is one of those trendy places that mix chandeliers with white forms of animal heads. It’s somehow a little swanky, vintage, and western all at the same time. Very Young House Love of them. My favorite part of Tillman’s is the table side s’mores. They bring homemade marshmallows, wafers, and chocolates to your table complete with a flaming pot for you to roast your own s’mores. Yum. But definitely not where I’ll be taking my one year old.
There are so many ways that our lives will change when we start TTC and have a baby, but in the mean time, we are just trying to enjoy our final weeks and months as DINKs. Here’s to enjoying all the wonderful things about not being a parent while dying to be a parent! [Raises delicious glass of red wine]
Did/Do you have a “DINK To-Do” list? What was on it? To all the pregnant/mama bees, what would you suggest that people try to enjoy and do more of pre-baby?
nectarine / 2152 posts
I love this!! I’ve been thinking about stuff like this the past three months of TTC, like ‘Yay, I can drink wine tonight at dinner with the girls’, etc but it would be a good idea to make a ‘couples’ list to involve DH, thanks for the suggestion!
pomegranate / 3225 posts
I was just thinking of how scared/excited I am to leave DINK status yesterday! I love this list, although we are past the red wine drinking stage
pomegranate / 3414 posts
We did not have an official DINK list but once we found out we were pregnant the first time DH spent some time mourning all the things he wanted to do but now wasn’t going to be able to do. I now spend a lot of time mourning the things I think we could still do but he won’t agree to.
As for item #4 on your list-you might be surprised that you can still go camping/hiking even when pregnant (depending upon if and how bad of MS you get). I am not a tent camping type of gal but agreed to do it once with DH (I was about 4m preg with our first at the time). This pregnancy we went camping this past week-end at 6m preg but stayed in a 5th wheel camper instead of a tent.
blogger / wonderful cherry / 21628 posts
Traveling was definitely on our DINK list.
honeydew / 7504 posts
Concerts was our big thing. We both love going to concerts and know that once baby comes, they won’t fit into the budget or the schedule. We banged out some of our favorites earlier this year while TTC. Baby’s first concert? Foreigner! I was 4 weeks pregnant!
GOLD / wonderful grape / 20289 posts
I didn’t have a list. People told me to see movies, but I didn’t believe them. Boy was I stupid!
guest
We didn’t have an official list… but we did take a 3 week trip to Thailand that we called our ‘per-responsibility’ trip! We knew after babies it would be a while before we could save that much money and time off for a big trip. Traveling hasn’t really slowed as our little guy has flown 4 time in his 21 months and gone on numerous more road trips but no passport for him yet. And these trips are different after baby unless we can convince Gramie to come along.
Otherwise we’re pretty much baby goes everywhere parents. He went to his first bar at 6 days old. We took him camping right before his first birthday (could have done those a lot more – but I only camp 1x/yr – it was a music festival). Took him to a concert (in a bar type place) at 7 mos (ear muff headsets are great!). The first year it’s SUPER easy to bring them where-ever. Second year – not so much!
honeydew / 7916 posts
This inspires me to make a list…maybe not a DINK list, but definitely a to-do list. We had kind of a last hurrah in Marrakech and London just before starting TTC, since although we’d like to take a baby overseas I don’t know how long it’ll be before we can do trips like that again.
guest
We have a toddler now – we never had a to-do-list before, but here is what i miss most: 1. sitting in a cafe for brunch / or breakfast and read magazines – for more than a stroller-nap-period 2. go shopping. 3. read books. i used to read books in bed at night, now i just fall asleep. also daytime book reading is out of the question. sundays on the couch with a good book, coffe and cake? sounds like heaven now! (i hope i don’t scare anyone, since these things seem so normal in comparison to travelling the world
yet they aren’t for me anymore…
GOLD / wonderful apricot / 22646 posts
LOVE THIS LIST! As we were catching baby fever, DH and I planned our 1 year anniv trip to CABO purposely because we had a feeling that we’d start our TTC journey shortly thereafter… (anniv in sept, ttc started in nov!)… we’re so glad we went! And in the months since our bfp (march)… we’ve made lots of movie dates and just got back from a last min babymoon getaway, just to get our time in while we still can!
cherry / 170 posts
The good news is we’ve done all of those thing (some w/ kids, some relying on a sitter) except camping (not my cup of tea regardless) with both of our kids.
–Miriam, MT Little G (2.11) and Ladybug (7 mo)