Hellobee

 Part 1

Tuesday, 4:00 pm

We arrived at the hospital just after 4pm. There were several excruciating speed bumps on the way to the hospital. I refused to let Mr. S leave me at the door and insisted we go together to park the car. I had nearly a dozen contractions between the parking garage and L&D. At the entrance to the elevator, I let a woman and her young daughter go up without us. I didn’t want her daughter to hear or see me working through contractions; I tackled each one with as deep an “mmm” sound as I could manage, since a higher pitch noise made my whole body tense.

When we got to L&D, I stood in the middle of the hallway having one contraction after another. Between contractions a nurse asked if I wanted room 4 or room 11. I chose room 11 on the Western side of the building because the sun was setting and I love napping in the afternoon light.

I had not progressed any more from 3cm when my midwife Karen checked me. The baby was incredibly low. She offered me Nubain to sleep and get some rest, but I refused. We had previously discussed how Nubain can take the edge off and help you rest, but when it wears off the contractions will have increased in intensity without your experiencing the increase gradually. So when you feel the contractions again, they can be too much to handle and the slippery slope of needing more pain meds begins.

Karen went home at 5 because she had carpooled with someone who needed a ride home again. She promised to be back in two hours. I labored standing while signing papers and getting checked in. I continued to drink. The nurse passed me a gown to change into, but I declined and kept my yoga pants, long sleeve t-shirt and cardigan on. I got an IV line in my hand and started my first bag of antibiotics. I sat down in a rocking chair and was hooked up to the fetal monitor. I continued to drink water and Gatorade and even though I wasn’t the least bit thirsty, and had been drinking at least one 16oz bottle of water an hour; I was dehydrated. I increased my drinking.

6:00 pm

At 6pm a nurse came in to set me free from the IV bag and to tell us there were a few blips on the fetal monitor, so after calling Karen, they decided to leave me on the monitor until Karen returned. I removed it every 30 minutes or so to go to the bathroom. We got into a great groove where with each contraction either Juli, my doula, or Mr. S would press into the palm of my right hand while the other pushed down hard on my shoulders. We got out my travel neck pillow that I had thrown in my bag at the last minute, and I was able to doze for a minute between each contraction. Juli had rope lights around the room and soft music playing like you would hear during a massage. All the other lights were off and no one except Karen and one night nurse ever came in our room.

7:30pm

At 7:30pm Karen returned. The monitor looked fine so I was unhooked and free to move around. I stayed in the rocking chair and Juli went to get food. I asked for chicken soup, but the cafeteria was closed and all she could manage was a few sandwiches, some chicken salad and baked lays. Someone fed me chicken salad and I ate a granola bar. And I drank.

Mr. S started to have to accompany me to the bathroom. We are not bathroom accompaniers. We had to have a short “get over it” discussion since I could not stand or sit on my own anymore. I would stand from the rocking chair, hang on his neck while Juli pressed my palm, walk a few feet, have another contraction, have another in the bathroom, and then was usually able to get up quickly enough after using the bathroom that I could hang on Mr. S for the most intense of my contractions. It was such an ordeal, but I just didn’t want IV fluid.

9:00pm

I continued to drink. At 9pm Karen came back to check in and I was 5cm. She handed Juli a pair of those massive postpartum undies and a giant pad and said that my water was going to break any minute. It never did.

10:00pm

I went back on the fetal monitor for about a half hour around 10pm and then took it off myself at 10:30. Juli prepared the shower and I got in around 10:45pm. I sat in the shower with the hot water on my belly for a long time before standing with the water running down my back, until I couldn’t stand any longer. All the while I had my right hand out and Mr. S was applying pressure whenever I shook my hand. He was soaked and cold. I kept telling him I loved him and that he was “so good at this.”

Wednesday, 12:00am

Just before midnight I was still 5cm, and Karen strongly encouraged that I get an epidural so that my body could relax and dilate. I couldn’t keep my head up anymore and standing was becoming nearly impossible; I just sat in the rocker with my eyes closed and my head on the neck pillow, rocking through the contractions. My ultimate goal was to avoid a c-section and even though I wanted an unmedicated labor, Karen was concerned that I wouldn’t have the strength to push the baby out if I didn’t get rest. I looked to Mr. S for reassurance that it was ok to get an epidural; he averted his eyes. I looked to Juli and she assured me that I could do whatever I wanted to do. They let me talk it out even though in the back of my mind, I knew I was ready. I called my mom and cried.

2:00am

It took nearly two hours for the anesthesiologist to arrive after making the decision to get the epidural. During those two hours I had the most intense contractions! The anesthesiologist was incredibly chipper and chatty. Apparently he lives three blocks from us and insisted we go see his massive holly tree with all its Christmas lights. We did a few nights later. I used the bathroom one last time before getting a catheter and the epidural. I dropped my one and only “F” bomb during a contraction I had while lying in bed – NOT an ideal labor position for me! They had me roll from one side to the other to get the epidural to take evenly, a fear I had from a friend’s horror story. Karen returned to her office to sleep since I was her only laboring mom that night. I texted my mom.

3:00am

An hour later Karen returned to break my water. The fluid was clear. She inserted a foley catheter to measure the intensity of my contractions. We turned off the lights and Mr. S and Juli somehow figured out how to make the couch into two beds. Mr. S was on the floor and Juli was on the bed. I tried to rest, but every few minutes I needed something. I felt invigorated by the sudden dulled pain. I wanted water, chapstick, something to eat. Poor Mr. S got up every time before Juli gently told me to go to sleep. I slept lightly, but kept hearing the cries of newborn babies entering the world down the hallways of the packed-to-capacity hospital.

3:30am

Karen came back to start a drip of Pitocin to increase the intensity of my contractions. I panicked, asked that they give me the minimum dose, and fell back to sleep.

6:30am

Karen came back to check me. I was 9cm and the baby was at a +1 station. We decided that I would rest for a little longer and increase the Pitocin to help me labor down for another hour. We all fell asleep again.

7:50am

A nurse came into the room, turned off my epidural and started to move things around to prepare for delivery. I was 10cm and the baby was at a +2 station. I asked if we could sleep longer. Juli and Mr. S tidied up their beds and cleaned up my gazillion water bottles. I had a little more granola bar and some Gatorade. Karen left to get suited up.

8:10am

I called my mom and cried, saying “they want me to push and I’m scared.”

I started to push with the nurse’s assistance before Karen returned. After three pushes, she had me stop to wait for Karen. She turned the mirror so I could see baby Stroller’s head. It was amazing, but I asked her to turn it away. Karen returned and noticed some slight meconium, so the NICU team was called. I remember Karen saying to the nurse, “tell the NICU team to come to room 11. Walk, don’t run.” and I started to push again.

Mr. S stood up near my head, holding my hand. I asked Karen to put the mirror back so I could see. Juli was on my right and the nurse on my left. I would push at each contraction, exactly how I had practiced pushing during the previous weeks (it’s TMI for the interwebs, but use your imagination; it apparently made my pushing highly effective). I would close my eyes and push for the count of ten, then open my eyes and look at the mirror. At one point someone said, “open your eyes!” and I watched my baby enter the world. Baby Stroller was out in 9 pushes.

Karen held baby Stroller up, but the umbilical cord was in the way so Mr. S didn’t know what sex to announce. I heard Karen whisper to Mr. S “it’s a boy” and then Mr. S repeated “it’s a boy!”

Karen asked, “what’s his name” and I whispered to Mr. S, “can it be Christopher,” my father’s name. He nodded. I said, “Maddox Christopher.”

Because of the meconium, baby Stroller had to be passed to the NICU team who was standing in the corner, waiting out of my sight. His cord had to be cut right away; we couldn’t delay clamping as we’d planned. He also had to go straight to the warmer to be assessed rather than placed on my chest. But we delayed putting ointment in his eyes and his Vitamin K shot, and he was back within a minute or two. Baby Stroller was placed on the center of my chest and he began the breast crawl to my right side. Within an hour he had found my breast and was nursing. It was amazing to see him instinctively move toward my breast and start to nurse. Mr. Stroller and I both cried.

We both remarked that he looked beautiful and not nearly as smushed and ugly as we’d expected. I asked the nurse if every parent thinks their baby is beautiful. She said that ours was truly a beautiful newborn. I think she says that to every new mom.

Maddox Christopher was born Wednesday, December 14 at 8:48 am weighing 7lbs 5oz and 20.5” long. Total labor 34 hours, 27 unmedicated, 100% perfect.

I forgot to call my mom.